Love: Today, I went on a date with the hottest guy I've ever met. He...

By OTZ - 26/01/2010 11:30 - France

Today, I went on a date with the hottest guy I've ever met. He is also rich and successful, and would probably be perfect for me, if only he could stop bragging about it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 027

You deserved it 14 115

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Same thing different taste

Back to the comfort zone I go

By Anonymous - 24/10/2024 09:00 - United States - San Diego

Today, I tried to step out of my comfort zone and go out with a guy who’s not my usual type. He spent the whole date griping and complaining about how women never go for “nice guys” like him. When I pointed out we were currently on a date, he said, “I mean hot girls.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 650

You deserved it 101

Never again

By Catsfordays - 20/08/2015 06:02 - United States - Yucaipa

Today, I went on a date with someone I considered a real catch, my potential soulmate even. He ended up telling me about his fetish for "female smells", sang loudly in Italian in a crowded restaurant, and ate most of the food on my plate. Man, fuck dating. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 942

You deserved it 2 633

Get it on, bang a gong

By Anonymous - 12/09/2019 15:00 - Bulgaria - Sofia

Today, I'm dating the perfect guy. He's smart, considerate, charming, funny, good looking and we have a ton of interests in common. He also can't get it up. At all. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 749

You deserved it 239

By LoveSucks - 18/05/2019 21:54

Today, I went on a blind date. All my date would talk about was how he was 'really his own best friend'. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 863

You deserved it 154

Money first

By Anonymus - 31/01/2020 20:00 - Canada - Warkworth

Today, my "boyfriend" told me that he loves money more than me and would date it if he could. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 920

You deserved it 328

By newmoongirl1036 - 13/07/2015 02:03 - United States - Chicago

Today, I went on a date with a guy that I really like. At the last minute he informed me a friend would be tagging along. To keep his friend from being a third-wheel, I kept up a conversation, and managed to piss my date off. He thought I would be a better match for his friend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 986

You deserved it 3 363

By SoccerBabe42 - 26/12/2011 12:11 - Canada

Today, I went on a blind date. All my date would talk about was how he was "really his own best friend." FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 939

You deserved it 3 240

What the hell is even that?!

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - United States - Lake Forest

Today, I went on what I thought was a date. After a wonderful night with a perfect gentleman, he told me how excited he is that he's moving in with his girlfriend next week, and thanked me for reassuring him that he doesn't want anyone but her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 969

You deserved it 4 006

By Anonymous - 14/05/2016 15:48

Today, a very attractive man asked me out on a date, and I said yes. He is tall, charming and a very good kisser. I'm sure the woman he heavily made out with after I left would agree. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 779

You deserved it 995

By boohoo - 04/06/2012 12:45 - Netherlands - Amstelveen

Today, I was on a date with a very intelligent and handsome guy. I was so nervous that when he was telling me about his twin sister, I asked him if they were identical twins. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 578

You deserved it 21 061

cthulhu1138 1

Tuesday 26 January 2010 16:30

Being good-looking, rich, and having many achievements tends to raise one's ego. Deal with it or move on.

Sannekee 18

Tuesday 26 January 2010 16:32

First date? It can be the nerves? Try second date and decide afterwards....

Comments

Unstoppable15 0

Wednesday 28 July 2010 0:33

uhmm this isn't even a FML... Wow get over it

Trembelwick 5

Wednesday 12 October 2011 23:56

Big ego, small dick

Tekeler 3

Thursday 5 January 2012 15:17

Hey, flaunt what you got.

Irakli_1 27

Sunday 15 January 2012 18:35

GET over it.

carolineaxoxo 1

Wednesday 4 April 2012 3:11

That's seriously so annoying. Most guys brag way too much, biggest turn off!

Sir_Swaggington 6

Sunday 2 December 2012 6:41

Maybe he has a nice, humble business partner lol

fluffywaspluka 7

Saturday 1 February 2014 0:37

And four years later, twinkle, Shut up.

uniteandfight 9

Friday 25 April 2014 8:10

I think I mighta seen you at a restraunt...

Canis_Lupus 4

Friday 1 August 2014 9:59

You say he is hot, rich and successful, and that he is perfect for you. Based on that I am going to think you are a bit of a gold digger. YDI.

GnaR_KiLL5150 12

Wednesday 26 November 2014 22:10

Probably perfect for you based on the good looks and success I assume, sounds like he dodged a bullet if he annoyed you away...

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The Top

Today, my ex-girlfriend from several years ago texted me. We were having a pleasant conversation until she asked me to give advice. Apparently, her current boyfriend is incapable of talking dirty, fingering, and other sexual aspects. She asked me to give him advice and pointers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 636

You deserved it 1 195

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex. Feeling goofy, I thought it’d be funny to try to reenact that horrible sex scene from the movie Showgirls. I threw my body back, but completely lost my balance and smashed my head on the headboard. I ended up with a bad concussion and a huge hospital bill. FML

I agree, your life sucks 839

You deserved it 2 156

The Top

Today, my boyfriend got angry because I laughed when he asked me if he should retire from being a Pokemon Trainer. He was serious. He's also 21. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 813

You deserved it 11 829

Today, I woke up to the sound of birds chirping, had a wonderful cup of coffee, and found my son throwing up rubbing alcohol in the bathroom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 770

You deserved it 741

Today, is the third day since I opened my small coffee shop. My parents had given me a nice frame to put my first dollar from working in. I had to sneak in a dollar from my own wallet so they wouldn't know how bad business was when they came to visit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 250

You deserved it 2 835

Today, I was using a public toilet, when someone in the next stall reached under, grabbed at my low-hanging toilet paper and pulled at it at an insane speed, whispering some kind of weird chant. Then he suddenly stopped, screamed, and ran out. What the hell happened in there? FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 160

You deserved it 3 571

Today, my dad decided that he wanted to start a collection of sporks. They're filling up our car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 208

You deserved it 2 419

Today, my new office mate offered to let me smell her deodorant. This was after clipping her nails, before pulling out her needle point project, and while complaining how overworked she is. FML

I agree, your life sucks 866

You deserved it 93