Kids: Today, I went shopping with my new "It's true, I'm a Ninja" shirt...

By Anonymous - 08/11/2010 01:13 - United States

Today, I went shopping with my new "It's true, I'm a Ninja" shirt on. Suddenly an apple comes and hits me right in the eye. A little boy runs up to me, yells "You aren't a Ninja! A Ninja would have caught that!", and runs off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 326

You deserved it 65 370

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Same thing different taste

Do it again!

By immy504 - 30/11/2011 05:39 - United States

Today, at my job as a waitress, I fell, landed on my ass, managing not to spill the drinks or drop the food in my hands. A little boy yelled, "NINJA WAITRESS!" Everyone at work has been calling me that all day, and purposely been trying to trip me to see if I could do it again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 316

You deserved it 5 939

By Lame - 10/07/2011 00:19 - United States

Today, I was robbed by a guy wearing a ninja turtle costume. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 932

You deserved it 6 793

By ahuman - 29/09/2013 05:10 - United States

Today, I saw two kids having a fistfight in the street. I ran over to stop them, and one ended up hitting me in the eye. I now have a black eye over what turned out to have been a fight over who was going to get the last slice of pizza. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 767

You deserved it 9 771

By Anonymous - 02/05/2013 06:29 - United States

Today, a friend and I were walking around a festival when out of nowhere a giant bug hit me in the face. I went into instant ninja mode, screaming and flailing. When I stopped, I realized it was just a leaf and everyone was staring at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 071

You deserved it 17 885

By notarobber - 15/05/2013 07:20 - United States - Los Angeles

Today, I was wearing a black shirt, black pants, and a black beanie at a grocery store. I came around a corner, bumped into a woman and she screamed, "Murderer." I was immediately thrown out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 713

You deserved it 10 115

By bbbkingsey - 23/07/2009 07:10 - United States

Today, while walking through the park, a little boy came running up to me and hit me in the nuts with a stick. I fell on the ground and looked up just in time to see his mom giving him the thumbs up with a smile on her face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 883

You deserved it 4 373

Fight Club

By Nose bleed - 16/04/2014 02:48 - Canada - North Vancouver

Today, I was eating an apple in class. When I went to take a big bite, my teeth went right through the apple, causing me to scrape the apple right up my face. My nose then started to bleed. I'm now known as the girl who punched herself in the face with an apple. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 315

You deserved it 7 816

By cganon - 21/09/2010 12:44 - United Kingdom

Today, I was in a store when a child looked at me and said to his mother "look at that tall man!" His mother replied "he's an evil giant isn't he, darling?" I then mimed being an evil giant to make the kid laugh. His mother slapped me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 688

You deserved it 5 029

By jessica - 17/02/2009 23:56 - United States

Today, I was working the register at a local grocery store. A kid about 5 years old was having trouble zipping his jacket. I reached out to help him and he started screaming "No bad touch bad touch!" and kicked me in the knee. Everyone looked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 069

You deserved it 9 529

By Braxam - 15/06/2011 16:42 - United States

Today, I was walking to class, when a kid came up behind me and smacked me in the face a few times until I fell to the ground. I rolled over and he said, "Oh shit! Wrong person, my bad." FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 586

You deserved it 3 641

marinus_fml 19

Monday 8 November 2010 8:37

You deserve it for thinking you're a ninja!

HeroOfWar 0

Monday 8 November 2010 8:38

Ydi, the kid was right.

Comments

LaFHlax 0

Saturday 13 November 2010 3:46

the kids right! :P

Elizabeth123654 0

Saturday 13 November 2010 5:02

that was you???? LOL nice to see ya again, dude!

hazzardtomyself 0

Thursday 18 November 2010 3:46

i'm not gonna lie, i really wanna meet this kid now. he just made my night.

janabanana18 0

Friday 19 November 2010 22:07

omg imma so try that next time!!! hahaha

AvaJacks10 6

Saturday 20 November 2010 15:57

dude, i have that shirt...

amberladora 0

Sunday 21 November 2010 14:26

well don't wear a ninja shirt if your not a ninja. makes sense

chunkymunky666 0

Wednesday 1 December 2010 9:11

PWNED by an apple

k9obsessed 5

Wednesday 22 December 2010 4:32

Lmao that reminds me of the Superman jokes Dane Cook does. "I hate it when people wear superman shirts. You're not superman! It's like, you see a person walking down the street wearing a superman shirt and shoot em in the chestplate. If they start bleeding..'I guess not...' If you bleed when someone shoots you in the chestplate, you shouldn't be wearing a superman t-shirt, you should be wearinga shirt that says 'I bleed when you shoot me in the chestplate.' "