Transportation: Today, I went to a party to see my crush. He offered me a drink...

By icantdrive - 19/03/2009 04:22 - Canada

Today, I went to a party to see my crush. He offered me a drink and I declined telling him that I don't drink because alcohol makes people act stupid and crash their cars. He then saw me back into a car parked on the street and shatter my backlights as I reversed from the driveway to go home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 289

You deserved it 73 382

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 02/01/2015 22:14 - United States - Baltimore

Today, I got shitfaced at a club. A cute girl I'd met earlier in the evening offered to drive me home in my car and spend the night with me. She crashed my car and did a runner before the cops showed up. They wouldn't believe my story. I now have a wrecked car and a DUI. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 111

You deserved it 10 268

Obsession by Calvin Klein

By Carrie - 04/12/2020 20:02 - United States - Birmingham

Today, I was at a party with my crush, but I didn’t talk to him. After, I walked out to my car, and saw a dent in my car. I then noticed that the dent was exactly the size of my crush’s head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 572

You deserved it 335

By boom - 17/03/2011 21:26 - United States

Today, my crush gave me a ride home. When I opened the door to get out, he switched the gear to reverse, thinking the car was in park. I got run over by the car door. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 144

You deserved it 3 785

By Stupid Drunk - 22/12/2012 05:01 - United States

Today, I was drunk at a party and confessed my love for my crush and told her how I felt. According to my friends, I made out with another girl not long after my confession. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 070

You deserved it 49 569

By Sam - 03/12/2011 10:03 - United States

Today, my friend and his girlfriend got in a fight while drunk and he started walking home. While driving around looking for him, I accidentally hit him with my car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 037

You deserved it 9 630

By Anonymous - 18/05/2009 06:45 - Canada

Today, I was drunk and crashed on my friend's couch to sober up. On the drive home, a cop pulled me over for seemingly no reason. He kept asking if I had been drinking, to which I answered no. Finally, he told me to look in the mirror. My friends had written all over my face while I slept. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 993

You deserved it 24 005

By Noj12345 - 25/06/2009 08:05 - United States

Today, after finishing work, my friend was having a party next door and my driveway was blocked. I parked 6 houses down and went to the party for 20mins. After coming out after 3 beers, I went to move my car back to my house and go to sleep. I got a DUI for driving 30 feet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 293

You deserved it 57 196

By Lmop68 - 27/05/2009 05:27 - Canada

Today, I saw my crush waving me over from the other end of the parking lot. I ran quickly to greet him, but in my excitement didn't take note of the giant Hummer backing out. I broke two ribs and all my crush was trying to do was warn me of the moving vehicle I was about to run into. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 049

You deserved it 17 357

Oh what a night

By EmployeeOfTheMonth - 09/06/2013 23:33 - United States - Montpelier

Today, I attempted to make a good impression amongst new coworkers by volunteering to be the designated driver at my work party. What did that get me? A backseat full of puke and some idiot too drunk to remember where he lived. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 466

You deserved it 9 137

By Anonymous - 01/09/2009 15:09 - United States

Today, I met a girl at a bar. After buying her a few drinks, we decided to head back to her place. Not wanting to leave either of our cars, I followed her home. While driving, she sent me text because she missed her exit. I tried to text her back something witty and instead rear ended her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 577

You deserved it 69 630

happy_ness 0

Thursday 19 March 2009 12:04

haha. apparently you don't need alcohol.

Locket_fml 0

Thursday 19 March 2009 12:55

#7 If you are driving, then don't drink. Obviously. However the OP was being self-righteous ("alcohol makes people stupid and crash their cars"). By all means make the choice not to drink, but when someone offers you a drink, thats all you need to say - "sorry, I don't drink". There is no need to act all high and mighty like you are somehow better for not drinking.

Comments

kwbuzz23wk 0

Thursday 19 March 2009 15:10

thats what you get for being a girl... cant drive anyways, get shwasted and have a sober dude drive you home. hope you are embarassed for talkin like you are better than ppl and then wrecking your car anyways

lifesabit 0

Thursday 19 March 2009 15:12

..... wait..... hold on? Drinking DOESN'T make people act stupider and crash their cars? And a sentence DOES count as a whole speech? Wow. Calm it down alcoholics.... :p.

jSOPURE 3

Thursday 19 March 2009 15:15

#20- How very true. I drink on occasion but it doesn't make me stupid.

amykillswitch 0

Thursday 19 March 2009 15:17

umm yeah karma got you on this one. he probably laughed his way back in to that party.

legendbyday 0

Thursday 19 March 2009 15:25

******* loser

hahawtfFUL 0

Thursday 19 March 2009 15:34

hahaha! you don't need alcohol to make you act stupid and crash cars you just do it on your own!! hahaha

roflmaonade 2

Thursday 19 March 2009 15:39

please don't go to a party and decline to drink, talkin bout some "makes people act stupid". if you didn't notice, drinking and being wild(ly stupid) is the pinnacle of most teen nighttime parties and if you're against drinking then don't go? simple.