Miscellaneous: Today, I went to my local coffee shop. I soon witnessed the girl...

By bitchimgay - 22/07/2012 16:48 - Canada - Montreal

Today, I went to my local coffee shop. I soon witnessed the girl making my drink apparently dislodge a wedgie from her ass-crack and then sneeze into her hands. When I confronted her, she loudly accused me of "visually molesting" her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 124

You deserved it 2 335

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Family meals that turn absurd, because Thanksgiving is also about laughing at little disasters. More…

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Same thing different taste

Creepy

By Finn - 05/07/2016 06:49 - United Kingdom - London

Today, I went to grab a coffee at a new café in town. While sipping my coffee, I noticed a man staring at me through the window. I thought he was browsing the menu before I looked up mid-sip to him staring at me in the eye, sucking on his finger. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 494

You deserved it 976

Not cool

By Wet - 21/06/2023 15:00

Today, a woman started breastfeeding her infant in a restaurant. Disgusted, I told her to take it to the bathroom, as I was eating. In response, she squirted me with milk then went back to ignoring me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 235

You deserved it 3 942

By anonymous - 01/02/2016 06:07 - Canada

Today, I saw an elderly woman struggling to reach the top shelf in my local grocery store, so I went over and asked if she needed help. She then accused me of flirting with her and had me escorted from the property. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 057

You deserved it 1 460

By Anonymous - 05/04/2013 16:26 - United States

Today, while working the drive-through, a woman ordered a large coffee with four creams. I handed her the coffee, and she took a sip. She then hurled it at me, screaming, "I said four creams, not five!" and sped off, leaving me drenched in hot coffee. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 991

You deserved it 3 034

Child labor

By great parenting pal - 11/08/2020 02:01

Today, I was dining out with friends. I saw a mom instructing her young child to go to empty tables and take whatever cash had been left. I discreetly told the manager. He confronted the woman and pointed right at me. As she was being thrown out, she tossed a very heavy mug at my head. It hit me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 305

You deserved it 264

WTF? FML!

By ricky the sage - 05/10/2013 00:04 - United Kingdom - Coventry

Today, I was on the bus, heading to work, when the girl beside me started yelling at me, claiming I was staring down her shirt. I did no such thing, but the driver nonetheless stopped the bus and made me get off, all under the withering glares of the other passengers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 441

You deserved it 3 380

Nice

By Anonymous - 27/07/2024 09:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I was at a coffee shop, trying to get to know the cute new barista. I wanted to compliment his nice eyes, but I got nervous and blurted out, "You have nice elbows!" He stared at me, confused, as I quickly grabbed my coffee and left. Now I can't even imagine going back there. FML

I agree, your life sucks 163

You deserved it 419

By CoffeeStained - 10/11/2015 15:54 - United States - Richmond

Today, I set my cup of coffee down on the stall floor to take care of my business. A hand reached under the stall door and took my coffee. I yelled to give it back, calling them obscene names. Moments later, my fresh coffee came flying over the door. I'm burned from my head to my legs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 409

You deserved it 10 135

Surprise!

By Anonymous - 21/01/2010 05:30 - United States

Today, I was drinking from a water fountain. I bent over to sip the water and felt a HUGE slap on my ass. Completely confused, I turn around to see some guy with a horrified look on his face. Apparently he thought I was his girlfriend. Then I saw his girlfriend standing behind him, giving me the evil eye. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 742

You deserved it 2 832

By walmart: first time, last time - 12/05/2013 16:37 - United States

Today, while I was out shopping, a fairly hideous-looking woman stormed up to me and accused me of ogling her, saying, "As if I'd ever date you!" Less than a minute later, she'd somehow managed to bully me into falsely admitting to it and apologizing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 180

You deserved it 14 775

Redoxx_fml 22

Monday 23 July 2012 2:21

What. The. ****?

rhaemese 9

Monday 23 July 2012 2:22

That, is disgusting.

Comments

Redoxx_fml 22

Monday 23 July 2012 2:21

What. The. ****?

rhaemese 9

Monday 23 July 2012 2:24

My thoughts exactly.

hockeyoceancity 13

Monday 23 July 2012 2:50

9- Your thoughts were actually, "that, is disgusting."

DJP0N3 0

Monday 23 July 2012 3:12

Cant tell if trolli g or serious

Futacy 29

Monday 23 July 2012 3:15

WTF!? She's accusing you? She's the one who dug her hand in her pants right in front of you to pull her panties out of her ass!

rhaemese 9

Monday 23 July 2012 3:28

26 my thought was initially what the ****, but someone already said that. Afterward that is disgusting came to mind.

StoryOfTheYear 14

Monday 23 July 2012 3:54

She has the worst case of wishful thinking I've ever heard of.

Redoxx_fml 22

Monday 23 July 2012 4:42

26-Stop visually molesting 9

airforce987 20

Monday 23 July 2012 7:51

The sad part is, I'm not even surprised that something as absurd as "visual molestation" could be accused of someone in this day in age. People today are so ******* uptight and paranoid about sexual abuse, so much so that even looking at someone the wrong way is one step short of being illegal. It's just ******* disgusting, the absurdity of it all.

starman02 12

Monday 23 July 2012 8:19

Totally agree airforce987

tjv3 10

Tuesday 24 July 2012 1:33

Well I hope you either asked for a refund if you already paid or if you didn't pay first I hope you left

FiFiLovee 26

Tuesday 10 September 2013 4:25

And then you bitch slapped her for being a moron right? -.- Not only is she a unhygienic pig, but she seems to also be a rude ****.

rhaemese 9

Monday 23 July 2012 2:22

That, is disgusting.

hockeyoceancity 13

Monday 23 July 2012 2:53

9- Your thoughts were actually, "That, is disgusting."

THE_A_TEEN 27

Monday 23 July 2012 3:39

Like no way! I could have never figured it out on my own. Thanks for the help, Captain Obvious!

IAmJad 18

Monday 23 July 2012 22:23

I know. A manager needs to be spoken to.

natalie_sucks 9

Saturday 13 September 2014 21:49

You're rude as ****.✋

paolayupp 6

Monday 23 July 2012 2:23

I visually molest my baristas all the time too.. They don't mind it though.

MikeonFML 17

Monday 23 July 2012 3:32

Reminds me of hall pass...mm I took mental photos as well

OLIVIAx33 6

Monday 23 July 2012 5:05

Reminds me of the lady with the cold sore

Youngnut18 6

Wednesday 25 July 2012 9:00

Haha does anyone else notice OP name was "bitchimgay" ?

qwtf 14

Monday 23 July 2012 2:23

I hope she wasn't handling your order.... Btw love the name XD

redbluegreen 40

Monday 23 July 2012 2:26

She was.

bengermin 5

Monday 23 July 2012 3:21

Um.. Baristas don't exactly touch the coffee, how could her germs get into your drink?

Booch1117 4

Monday 23 July 2012 3:22

OP's name sounds like something the based god would say.

outoftown 26

Monday 23 July 2012 4:13

#40, A barista behaving like this is a health hazard. Butt = E. coli, to name one.

outoftown 26

Monday 23 July 2012 4:23

#40, Oh, and don't forget the sneezing into hand. And this is what she is doing in front of one customer. Wouldn't trust her hygiene with any food/containers.

DontClickOnMe 28

Monday 23 July 2012 2:24

That's nasty, but at least you saw what happened, so now you know not to drink the coffee. If she won't make you another one after she washes her hands, then you should see if someone else can make it for you or talk to a manager.

sugarmommy 4

Monday 23 July 2012 2:24

at least it was only a beverage. could be worse..

ALpein 0

Monday 23 July 2012 21:17

You're an idiot.

Bluemonster3 26

Monday 23 July 2012 2:24

What a bitch

perdix 29

Monday 23 July 2012 2:26

Where do you think the "crema" comes from?

THE_A_TEEN 27

Monday 23 July 2012 3:37

From the the front, obviously. Starbucks has its own milking plant that forces people to... You know and ship the product as conveniently labeled "dairy cream".

every1luvsboners 11

Monday 23 July 2012 2:33

1) Find empty cup 2) Go to bathroom 3) Take shite in cup 4) Throw cup full of shite at her 5) Run

yankfan89 27

Monday 23 July 2012 2:50

Have you done that before?

Sarcastic_x 6

Monday 23 July 2012 3:05

Yup, that should solve everything.

jetsown08 21

Monday 23 July 2012 3:31

Actually, 23, I have indeed. It didn't end up well either. I was charged with disorderly conduct, assault, battery, and domestic terrorism. Apparently, the glowing green stuff in my feces was "radioactive" and could have "seriously hurt" somebody.