Health: Today, I went to the drive-through and ordered 5 cheeseburgers....

By Anonymous - 09/08/2010 13:24 - United States

Today, I went to the drive-through and ordered 5 cheeseburgers. I told the cashier that some of them were for my girlfriend. I don't have a girlfriend, and I ate all of them by myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 367

You deserved it 54 313

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Same thing different taste

By hamburglar - 11/08/2016 18:46 - United States - Irving

Today, I ordered two double cheeseburgers from McDonald's and asked for one of them without pickles so they would think I was ordering for two people. Both burgers were for me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 525

You deserved it 8 504

Keeping up appearances

By waterpistolriot - 23/10/2020 11:02 - Austria

Today, I ordered food for delivery. I actually made it sound as if there were other people at home so I had an excuse for ordering so much. I don't think they bought it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 464

You deserved it 855

A bit much

By Anonymous - 27/08/2019 18:00 - United States

Today, I ordered takeout. When I looked in the bag, I saw they'd included four sets of plastic cutlery. In other words, someone at the restaurant packed my order, then estimated that there must be at least four people eating such a large meal. I was eating alone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 527

You deserved it 982

By drummahboi99 - 04/12/2011 01:29 - Canada

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me while placing her order. I work as a Drive-Thru cashier at McDonalds. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 526

You deserved it 5 216

Classic

By Anonymous - 11/03/2021 16:30 - United States - Enterprise

Today, I ordered a large stuffed crust supreme pizza for myself. When I picked it up, I asked for extra plates and napkins so the cashier wouldn't know I don't have any friends. FML

I agree, your life sucks 671

You deserved it 558

By Anaconda - 07/03/2017 14:00

Today, I ordered a plain cheeseburger. The cashier was confused, so I explained, "Just meat and cheese." When I got my food, my burger didn't have a bun. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 497

You deserved it 1 937

By Anonymous - 13/03/2013 23:22 - United States

Today, I invited my girlfriend to go eat out, hoping to put her in a really romantic mood. She decided to tell her friend, who then invited herself and another couple along. I ended up being made fifth wheel, and had to sit alone at an adjacent table. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 389

You deserved it 4 321

By IJustWantedCheez - 27/09/2016 17:37 - United States - San Antonio

Today, while on break from work, I went to the cafeteria and bought cheese cubes. One of my coworkers, who is usually very pleasant, asked to try some and I said yes. She ate all the cheddar cubes in the bowl, which are the only ones I like. I wasted $3 for someone else to eat my food. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 021

You deserved it 3 043

By Tired Hungry Geek - 27/10/2015 04:40 - United States

Today, I was exhausted after a long day at work and didn't feel like cooking so I went to a drive thru. I placed my order, went to the window and paid. I then drove off without my food and didn't realize it for a couple of blocks. I was too embarrassed to go back and get it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 681

You deserved it 10 327

By LonelyPorkChop - 18/12/2013 09:30 - Australia

Today, rather than buying one pork chop big enough for myself, I bought two smaller chops just so the cashier wouldn't think I was eating by myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 044

You deserved it 8 761

arhanes 0

Monday 9 August 2010 19:48

why even lie about it. doubt she cared

happyk 0

Monday 9 August 2010 19:53

The cashier might have thought they were for other people anyways. Why would the cashier care? It's none of her/his business.

Comments

cagedglobe 0

Tuesday 10 August 2010 3:44

dude you sound really fat like some guy that plays video games all day eating donuts

RadioOctopus 16

Thursday 1 December 2011 9:02

lol idiot

moon21_fml 0

Tuesday 10 August 2010 4:05

eat more fruit and veggies.

lancegonyeau 0

Tuesday 10 August 2010 4:13

who is the lucky one who gets to wipe your ass

hcovballer247 0

Tuesday 10 August 2010 4:18

I bet the cashier could care less how many burgers you bought, she just wants your money so that she can earn an income.

alex200256 0

Tuesday 10 August 2010 4:23

I feel your pain. :( FML.

x3molover 0

Tuesday 10 August 2010 4:29

I agree with 9.. btw, how can you even eat FIVE cheeseburgers?? I can barely even finish one without feeling like I'm about to puke

sheenakc 0

Tuesday 10 August 2010 4:40

HaHaHa! what a loser! hahaha! oh my sweet gravy! oooh but seriously, thats, thats just sad.

raininsnow 0

Tuesday 10 August 2010 4:41

you kinda made it obvious by making an excuse.

AbbyLOVE 0

Tuesday 10 August 2010 4:49

U should stop eating 5 cheeseburgers if u dnt want 2 get bigger than ur couch ;)

Arosamond 7

Tuesday 10 August 2010 5:29

This is a lonely FML. ): I agree, your life sucks.

Keywords

Awkward Miscellaneous Embarrassing Sleep Work Dating Love Am I overreacting? Annoying Parents Health Mental health Furniture Kids Gross Friends Fight Public freakouts Drugs Neighbours Cops Medication Relatable Animals Dogs Teenagers Gamers Ironic Video games Job interview

The Top

Today, at a job interview, my interviewer bent forward and I admired his ass. When he turned, I couldn't tell if he caught me or not. At the end of the interview he shook my hand in congratulations of getting the job, then said, "Yes, I do work out." I have to see him every day now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 531

You deserved it 32 698

Today, I really wanted to spend a night of passion with my lover, so I'd arranged to meet him in a very classy hotel, gave him the room number, and waited for him in a super-sexy outfit. There was a knock at the door, so I opened it slowly and enticingly, assuming it was him. It was room service. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 406

You deserved it 11 953

The Top

Today, I was rubbing one out in the shower. I guess I got a little too excited, because as I came close to climaxing, I had a serious asthma attack and had to wheeze for help. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 748

You deserved it 12 425

Today, I started my research project on horror stories and people's fascination with them. I did some research and wound up reading H.P. Lovecraft. On the upside, I can now pee more easily. On the downside, it's likely to be in my pants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 979

You deserved it 4 552

Today, my coworker tried to justify the overturn of Roe vs Wade by saying she had 3 kids and was able to do it. Yes, she was also married to their father for a few years, and when they divorced, the kids lived with him while she couchsurfed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 193

You deserved it 314

Today, I was pissing in a urinal and I had the urge to sneeze. Unable to hold it, I sneezed and hit my head on a metal beam supporting the urinal. In complete disarray, I had to step back from the urinal while pissing and managed to spray the floor, the wall, and the person next to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 63 353

You deserved it 7 770

Today, I tried to get my license. To get that, I needed to show proof of school enrollment. I graduated early, so they told me to get a copy of my diploma. I went to school, and they told me that I would need a valid driver's license to access my diploma. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 152

You deserved it 3 103

Today, I went to my uncle’s funeral. Later, I found out that his irresponsible idiot of a daughter had COVID, knew she had COVID, and not only showed up anyway, but didn’t bother to wear a mask, and went out of her way to go around hugging people. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 187

You deserved it 239

Same thing different taste

Keeping up appearances

A bit much

Classic

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