Animals: Today, I woke up on a friend's floor with a massive hangover...

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By drunk - 06/03/2010 07:38 - Australia

Today, I woke up on a friend's floor with a massive hangover after her party last night. My friend, who was next to me, barfed all over me. She then told me that while I was drunk last night, I made out with her dog as well as two of our other friend's boyfriends. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 284

You deserved it 40 980

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By marz88 - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, a friend of mine got a bit drunk, but said she was fine and didn't feel drunk at all. I took her keys anyway and said she could sleep on my bed, while I slept on the floor next to the bed. I was rudely woken up in the middle of the night to her rolling over and vomiting on my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 107

You deserved it 7 253

By Inconnu - 18/06/2011 05:13 - France

Today, I was holding my drunken friend's hair while she threw up in the toilet at a party. She said, crying, "Y'don't have to do this..." I told her that that's what friends are for. She replied, "Yeah, but I did sleep with your boyfriend..." FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 606

You deserved it 3 866

By Anonymous - 29/01/2019 16:00

Today, I am now sleeping on the floor because my friend got super drunk at a small party then peed herself in her sleep. I was sleeping beside her and my clothes smell like pee. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 167

You deserved it 240

Chain reaction

By Anonymous - 03/05/2023 13:30 - Australia

Today, I got drunk and spewed all over my lounge room floor. My dog ate it up, also got drunk, and also eventually spewed on the floor too. FML

I agree, your life sucks 203

You deserved it 1 147

By Med - 13/11/2012 12:02 - Netherlands - Groningen

Today, after clubbing with my girlfriend, we went to her place. She then threw up on the floor, and went to clean herself up. When she came back, she'd forgotten that she'd just thrown up. She blamed me for puking, and kicked me out. It was 4:00 am and a 3-hour walk home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 808

You deserved it 2 978

By justafriend - 28/05/2017 00:00

Today, I went to a bar with a close friend. She got drunk and was feeling sick, so I carried her to my car to take her to her house. Some stranger accused me of drugging her and tackled me with her in my arms. She threw up on me, and he took off running without an apology. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 266

You deserved it 390

By allennn - 14/03/2010 14:56 - France

Today, I went to a party, and the girl I really like started telling me how much she likes me and how she thought we would be good together. I was so drunk I threw up on her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 929

You deserved it 38 557

Tasty

By Anonymous - 22/05/2020 20:00

Today, while picking up my extremely drunk girlfriend from a party, she insisted on attempting to make out with me. She threw up in my mouth mid-kiss. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 799

You deserved it 299

By mushroomtop - 23/09/2017 23:15

Today, I woke up extremely hung over on a friend's couch after a night of heavy drinking and partying. To my horror, I discovered that, in my drunken state, I'd allowed said friend's six-year-old daughter to trim my hair. I now have a bowl cut. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 915

You deserved it 3 541

By gingerbread - 18/12/2017 18:00 - Armenia - Yerevan

Today, I got a little too drunk at my best friend's birthday party and threw up in the pub bathroom. I wiped everything up, composed myself, and went back to the party table before promptly throwing up on myself in front of the whole pub. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 000

You deserved it 3 729

Muffinish 0

Saturday 6 March 2010 15:53

you deserve it for getting shitfaced.

BeeSkwaird 0

Saturday 6 March 2010 15:57

"Two of our other friend's boyfriends" and "two of our other friends' boyfriends": huge difference.

Comments

malachy32 1

Friday 29 July 2011 22:23

thats disgusting and bs

wolfsgirlx0x 0

Thursday 18 August 2011 5:19

hilarious, but just pretty much a ****.

LiceDownUnder 3

Thursday 21 June 2012 1:01

Thats what you get for being a jersey shore wanna be...

carolynchan 0

Wednesday 4 July 2012 3:24

this, kids, is why you drink responsibly

Jessiegirl122 7

Tuesday 16 October 2012 22:35

In that exact order?

dannnngthatsux 19

Tuesday 10 March 2015 0:54

Ok folks. I don't love my animals like this but I know people who kiss their animals on the lips, it's not that bad. Two guys that have girlfriends? Yeah, that's pretty bad. And unless the dog bit her to make her stop, it wasn't abuse. Gross but not abuse.