Maybe OP isn't an adult?

Lots of kids do son

Sweet mother of jesus, I hope they never get a splinter.

i thought they used cucumbers

@55 they put condoms on the wood

I cringed reading this comment. Funny but, I shudder to think of how that would feel.

#55, that's never a problem because the wooden ones are usually varnished very thoroughly, especially the ones that have been handed down for generations.

Effie walks in on this, "that Is mahogany!"

77--handed down for generations?? 0.o sweet mother of pearl, I wouldn't want something that's been in my crusty grandma's vag...

Exactly! What kind of woman could possibly resist long, hard, solid mahogany?!

#91, don't worry, by the time your granny's vag got crusty, she wasn't inserting Woody anymore. She was just using the tip to massage her clit. Hope that helps.

118--helps? Well, it helped bring up my lunch, if that's what you mean. Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm going to find something mahogany or pine and shove it through my eyeball. Not in that way. Pervs ;)

OP obviously lives with her mother, so I assume she is a child. Thus, bringing her boyfriend over should definitely end well. :/

Yeah you're right, i dont think much before i speak/type

Nothing like the sound of my mom screwing Woody in the morning....

51 - Woody's seeing your mom too? He must be getting around. I bet Buzz is probably jealous.

Its woody wood picker!

*woodpecker.