Health: Today, in school my shoulder was killing me from a softball injury....

By Offended - 19/02/2009 07:09 - United States

Today, in school my shoulder was killing me from a softball injury. I went to the nurse's office and asked "Can I have some ice?" They responded with "Why, what happened to your face?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 331

You deserved it 2 994

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 19/01/2015 22:07 - Canada - Brampton

Today, while walking to work, I sneezed so violently that I slipped on a patch of ice and hit the ground hard, badly spraining my shoulder. I lay there in agony as a pair of bystanders just stood there, laughing their asses off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 629

You deserved it 3 130

Not helping, dude

By Anonymous - 03/07/2022 18:00 - United States

Today, a girl in my glass was complaining that her neck hurt. I thought if I forcibly turned her head side-to-side, it would instantly fix it like in the movies. It didn't. She was in so much pain, she couldn't even talk, and had to go to the hospital. FML

I agree, your life sucks 155

You deserved it 2 760

By elite - 19/01/2012 21:59

Today, at school, I was scheduled to give a presentation to my class. As I arrived, my teacher said to me, "You're bleeding from the 120th pimple on your left cheek." FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 482

You deserved it 4 356

Benched

By fmlprobot - 04/06/2009 23:48 - United States

Today, my baseball team had a game and one of our best players was injured sliding into first. I'm pretty fast so when the coach called my name I grabbed a helmet assuming it was finally my chance to get in the game. Turns out he just wanted me to get ice. The entire team couldn't stop laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 411

You deserved it 4 676

Roommate From Hell

By bigbuldge - 17/09/2019 00:01

Today, my roommate whipped my face with a frozen chicken cutlet. My cheek is now the size of the chicken cutlet, and now he won't drive me to the hospital because it's "too funny to look at." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 704

You deserved it 178

By hurts.to.pee - 19/01/2012 05:14 - United States

Today, I explained to my dad that I think I have a vaginal infection. I asked if he could take me to the doctor. He responded by saying, "Just shove some ice up there. It'll go away." FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 210

You deserved it 3 795

By Anonymous - 06/01/2010 21:15 - United Kingdom

Today, it was snowing. I slipped on the ice and fell in the middle of the road, dislocating my left shoulder and knee. As I was screaming in pain and trying to stand up, two boys on the pavement threw snowballs at me while everyone in the cars just drove around me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 207

You deserved it 2 829

By Drew - 26/04/2016 02:21 - United States - Newark

Today, at school, I wore a back brace because I have fractured vertebrae. During first period, a girl tapped me on the back to ask me a question. It made a "knocking on wood" sound. She looked at me like I was a freak. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 302

You deserved it 1 181

By Silent - 18/10/2018 17:30

Today, at the orthodontist, the nurse was checking my teeth. She asked me a question while her finger was in my mouth, and when I stupidly tried to reply, I bit her finger. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 142

You deserved it 447

By bcoper - 20/02/2010 14:03 - United States

Today, I was in pain due to overdoing it at the gym yesterday, so I thought a hot shower might help. Not only was there no hot water because of my sister's hour long showers, but I slipped getting out and hit my head. Now the pain is worse. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 393

You deserved it 3 273

littlec_fml 0

Tuesday 17 March 2009 20:18

no the ice is for that burn she just gave you

blah_blah_shity 0

Friday 20 February 2009 9:52

i laughed out loud for that one hehe.

Comments

karissaaa 0

Friday 10 April 2009 4:52

x( awh. lol, yeah i say stuff like that aall the time..just ignore it...i mean her xD

byteolu 0

Sunday 7 August 2011 8:24

Hey

TheUnnamedOne 0

Tuesday 14 April 2009 5:29

LMFAO!!

topbanana22 0

Wednesday 3 June 2009 0:38

omg lol!!! sux 4 u but u just got OH SNAPPED!!!!

ziqi92 0

Saturday 13 June 2009 23:30

damn u really got BURNED...!

ohhsnapp 0

Sunday 28 June 2009 22:52

ahahahahha. wow. that sucks.

Guitarist45 0

Sunday 1 November 2009 6:27

PWNED!!!!! nurse WIN!!!!!!!!

reniel 0

Friday 18 December 2009 17:52

LOL !! this made my day.

theawesome 0

Wednesday 17 February 2010 16:18

dude, YOU JUST GOT OWNED!!!

Katee0_o 6

Friday 5 March 2010 3:46

I know its wrong to laugh at other people... but HAHAHAHA!

OasC82 0

Sunday 21 March 2010 5:19

That's a sign.

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Today, while paying for dinner, my card declined and my date immediately left. The waitress then ran my card again successfully. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 246

You deserved it 211

Today, I discovered that I won't be able to wear the dress with a low neck line that I bought for my cousin's wedding, because my older brother thought it would be funny to mix a scented body-wash that he knows makes my skin break out in hives, with my regular one. My chest looks like a pizza. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 371

You deserved it 2 850

Today, I stopped to gas up. The pump wasn't taking my BP rewards card, and it said to go see the cashier. I went in to ask what's up, where the cashier politely pointed out that I was in a Shell gas station, not a BP. FML

I agree, your life sucks 475

You deserved it 2 008

Today, I was riding my newly trained horse. I've recently been suffering from bad gas, and ended up farting so violently, it spooked my horse into bucking me off and running away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 249

You deserved it 5 529

Today, my wife is furious at me because she made a memory box for our kids, with objects linked to milestones, silly memories, holidays and so on, and try as I might I couldn’t identify a single damn one of them, except for a paint sampler from the time we repainted the whole house in one weekend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 203

You deserved it 433

Today, after coming back from deployment, I found a homeless guy had broken into my house and made it his home for the last 5 months. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 180

You deserved it 2 726

Same thing different taste

Not helping, dude

Benched

Roommate From Hell

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