Birthday and Drugs: Today, it's my 18th birthday. I called my parents and they told...

By alrightsheryl - 28/03/2009 16:40 - United States

Today, it's my 18th birthday. I called my parents and they told me that they found weed in the guest house, so they called my boarding school to drug test me. It wasn't my weed. They didn't even say, "Happy Birthday." FML

I agree, your life sucks 70 618

You deserved it 4 899

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 16/08/2019 06:00

Today, I came home to my parents holding my marijuana. They told me that I had the stupidest hiding place ever, and that I was, "not only a pothead, but a dumbfuck pothead." FML

I agree, your life sucks 689

You deserved it 2 638

By lehonX9 - 06/06/2015 09:11 - Germany - Hanover

Today, my mom found my weed stash and went berserk, grounding me and saying she's going to have my bedroom door removed. Less than an hour later, I found her laughing and smoking the same stash with my dad in the backyard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 816

You deserved it 9 725

By Armstrong - 18/04/2015 23:55 - United States - Brownsville

Today, I found out that the only reason my parents have been letting me hang out with my friends so late is so they can search my room for drugs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 548

You deserved it 3 468

Sweet Sixteen

By Anonymous - 17/09/2021 13:59 - Netherlands

Today, it's my 16th birthday. My parents forgot about it, and planned a weekend out of town. I was alone on my birthday. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 082

You deserved it 97

Stoner

By Alyssa - 13/02/2012 00:01 - United States

Today, my parents were out, so I lit up my first ever joint. I got so stoned out of my mind that when my dad came back home and asked what the smell was, I said a stray cat had left an upper-decker in the toilet. He found the joint in my room, and now I'm grounded for the rest of the school year. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 849

You deserved it 83 228

Such a narc

By hatetheroommate - 16/04/2009 18:43 - United States

Today, I called the campus police "anonymously" while my roommate was away and told them about her weed stash because I was tired of her smoking in our room all the time. She had taken her weed to a friend's and got off scot-free. I have a hearing Monday for the Adderall they found in my desk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 788

You deserved it 130 310

By ironyisabitch - 02/06/2012 05:43 - United States - Rohnert Park

Today, my parents grounded me for finding their stash of weed. The irony is killing me right now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 336

You deserved it 3 084

Legalize it

By Anonymous - 25/07/2021 15:01 - Mexico - Mexico

Today, after arriving, I was told that there will be mandatory drug tests for everybody at my work. Yesterday, I did joints at a friend's party, as it was her birthday. I'm fucked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 419

You deserved it 1 474

By ugh - 01/12/2015 03:52 - Canada - Lethbridge

Today, my mother went through my bag and found what she thought was rolling papers. I was yelled at and called a stupid pothead with no future. They were facial blotting papers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 656

You deserved it 1 584

Bad influence

By BigSister - 13/09/2009 18:19 - United States

Today, my 15 year-old sister came home at 4 a.m. totally stoned. My parents treated her really nicely and woke me up. I'm now grounded until I go college for being a bad influence. I volunteer at schools to talk about drug abuse. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 048

You deserved it 3 400

DeeJayD 0

Saturday 28 March 2009 20:35

Wait a minute. You're at boarding school. It was in the guest house. What's wrong with this picture? Your parents are either just assholes, or phenomenally stupid.

dudewithface 0

Saturday 28 March 2009 20:21

happy birthday :)

Comments

australiaaaa 0

Saturday 28 March 2009 21:13

#19, maybe he was calling to arrange plans for his birthday or something. not necessarily trying to get birthday wishes.

ellebell 0

Saturday 28 March 2009 21:15

one day you'll be able to hold this against them :)

Vehicle 1

Saturday 28 March 2009 21:17

Happy Birthday! That *completely*, *completely*, sucks!!!

Fails_at_life 0

Saturday 28 March 2009 21:18

there is a reason you're in boarding school. YDI ya **** up, i don't blame the parents

jules96_fml 0

Saturday 28 March 2009 21:26

they sound like my awful parents! oh btw Happy Birthday :/

shaBAMalex 0

Saturday 28 March 2009 21:30

Since when is calling your parents on your birthday "fishing for compliments"? Maybe he/she wanted to talk to them, or make plans, like #21 said. The author never said he was calling them just to get them to wish him a happy birthday. :P

Domino7 0

Saturday 28 March 2009 21:35

Kinda have to go with #15. If you're in boarding school, either your parents really hate you or you did something to get there, like, say, smoke weed. If they're that suspicious, there is probably a reason. Oh, and happy birthday.

alex_vik 0

Saturday 28 March 2009 21:45

...A ******* guest HOUSE?

MukyDaCookie 0

Saturday 28 March 2009 21:50

Happy Birthay weed in the guest house though? If it was yours, why wouldn't you take it with you?? Ah well, forget em. After the test, get blazed out of your skull and give them a call :P

ladida12 0

Saturday 28 March 2009 21:58

Okay seriously. You people have obviously never heard of a legit boarding school. If he/she has a guest house, they're probably pretty well off. Which means they probably sent their kid to a nice boarding school with good teachers and kids who haven't necessarily done anything wrong. And maybe this kid wanted to go! I begged my parents to go because I didn't like my hometown school. It's college office sucked. I did nothing wrong and I go to one of the best schools in the country, so chill. My parents love me. They sobbed when I left. Some parents just want the best education possible for their children. If that be Andover or Exeter or St George's instead of Hometown High School, so be it. Also, half of you guys are complaining about how rich the kid is. Guess what? It's not his or her fault and its NOTHING to be ashamed of!