Money: Today, it's been three weeks since my dad finished growing what...

By Anonymous - 29/08/2014 16:16 - United States - Port Lavaca

Today, it's been three weeks since my dad finished growing what he calls a "Jesus beard" and gone out asking for donations and claiming to be Jesus Christ. I've been trying and failing to get a job for 2 years, and he's already raking in cash from gullible idiots. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 193

You deserved it 3 972

Thanksgiving: Turkeys and Skids
Family meals that turn absurd, because Thanksgiving is also about laughing at little disasters. More…

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Same thing different taste

By username - 17/11/2014 03:52 - United States - Elkhart

Today, my father told me to "go get a job". He has been unemployed for 3 years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 974

You deserved it 3 250

By Anonymous - 22/02/2010 16:38 - United States

Today, my dad screamed at me because I've been "spending too much money". He's been out of a job for 4 months and I've been giving him 300 dollars a month to help pay for bills... and his beer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 728

You deserved it 3 426

Clueless

By Anonymous - 11/06/2024 13:00 - United Kingdom

Today, after my dad got frustrated at me last month for not having a job and completely taking over my job searching, claiming it’s not that hard and he’d show me how it’s done. Since then, not one company has called or emailed him back and he doesn’t know why. Welcome to job searching in 2024, Dad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 533

You deserved it 86

It's fine, I'll walk

By assholedad - 11/02/2015 21:00 - United States

Today, I asked my dad to please shave his awful beard, because I'm a laughing-stock at school for being picked up each day by a guy whose face looks like Bigfoot's ass. He agreed, and 10 minutes later was sporting a pedo-stache. It's going to be a long year. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 366

You deserved it 11 037

This needs further details!

By Anonymous - 03/12/2021 11:01

Today, I was conned out of £50,000 by my own father, who everyone thought had been dead for 3 years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 992

You deserved it 197

By BulldogHoops - 12/11/2012 05:12 - United States - Broken Arrow

Today, I decided to buy a meal for a homeless man who was being shunned at an intersection. When I went to hand it to him, I realized it was my dad, wearing a tattered old shirt and pretending to be homeless to make some money. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 418

You deserved it 2 438

Viking issues

By Anonymous - 15/09/2022 09:00

Today, after I spent 3 months growing my beard and hair so I could go for the Viking look, my mom told me I look almost eerily identical to the registered sex offender who lives 2 streets away. Out come the clippers, I’m going full bald. Three months wasted FML

I agree, your life sucks 959

You deserved it 260

By thesixth - 02/03/2016 18:53 - Kenya

Today, being jobless and all, I tried calling my dad for a job after my many years of pride. He invited me to an interview to compete against 10 people, probably more qualified than I am. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 067

You deserved it 7 221

By idontunderstand - 07/05/2018 19:00

Today, my father has been unemployed for 8 of my parents' 25 years of marriage, and my mom still supports him. I've been unemployed for three months and my mom is kicking me out. The difference is, I'm actually applying places. He just plays video games. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 755

You deserved it 322

By alanh69 - 26/08/2014 19:12 - United States - Woodward

Today, I asked my dad to give me a haircut. After 20 minutes of "fuck"s and "shit"s, he gave up and just shaved my head bald. I pull off the look so badly that two people I don't even know have already told me I look like a psychopath. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 310

You deserved it 6 409

Welshite 39

Saturday 30 August 2014 0:26

Just wait until he starts selling bottles of water and claiming it's wine. That's really when the money will start flowing.

gjikvtj 18

Saturday 30 August 2014 0:40

"Laughed so hard my sombrero fell off and I dropped my taco" for those out of middle school

Comments

crunchycheeto99 11

Saturday 30 August 2014 0:32

Either this will motivate you or make you feel like shit..

DaBayst 15

Saturday 30 August 2014 0:32

They're probably just giving him money out of pity because they think he's insane.

DogeMan 14

Saturday 30 August 2014 0:33

Grow a beard and claim ur one the of duck dynasty guys lol

CobraLazerFace 21

Saturday 30 August 2014 1:12

Why would want to throw money at already rich people? Wait... I've figured out Mitt Romney's campaign strategy

skyeyez9 24

Saturday 30 August 2014 21:16

And you don't Obama is rich as well?! ALL politicians have money.

firstbasemaster 15

Saturday 30 August 2014 0:34

The nerve of some people

allisurd 17

Saturday 30 August 2014 0:35

Is he dressing and posing as Buddy Christ? If not, he's missing an opportunity there.

pinkchocoa 15

Saturday 30 August 2014 3:19

Dress up as mother mary

sammyjanette 17

Saturday 30 August 2014 0:42

If someone falls for that in the information age then they deserve to be swindled of their money.

Aleys_fml 21

Saturday 30 August 2014 0:43

OP you clearly have either not made good efforts while looking for a job or you've set your standards too high. There are plenty of jobs available in the U.S. They might not all be glamorous jobs but any job is better than no job. Fast food places and supermarkets are a great place to start looking for a job. And you can then set your standards higher and look for a better job while having an income.