Love: Today, it's my anniversary. I've been a single cat-lady for exactly...

By catlady - 09/01/2012 16:56 - United Kingdom

Today, it's my anniversary. I've been a single cat-lady for exactly one year. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 778

You deserved it 8 508

Thanksgiving: Turkeys and Skids
Family meals that turn absurd, because Thanksgiving is also about laughing at little disasters. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 07/05/2013 20:17 - United States - Canton

Today, I turned 35. Because I'm still single, my sister bought me a cat to help start my "inevitable collection." FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 075

You deserved it 6 430

By Anonymous - 18/10/2010 16:01 - United States

Today, it's my two year anniversary with my wife. She's celebrating the day with her new boyfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 095

You deserved it 3 398

Happy New Year to all the cats out there

By HappyNewYearsToMeAndMyCat - 01/01/2015 05:25 - Canada - Victoria

Today, I'm celebrating New Year's with my cat. I made her a cake. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 274

You deserved it 6 890

Check out Hank Pecker's Chadvice

By electronjames - 09/06/2024 17:00 - United States - Fredericksburg

Today, it's now exactly one year until I turn 30 and I’ve never been with a woman before. I know that it’s over for me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 341

You deserved it 242

By Nicole557 - 03/11/2011 10:56 - United States

Today, after a year and a half, I finally admitted to myself that I'm in an abusive relationship. Not with a person though. With my cat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 509

You deserved it 10 499

By Nick Nameous - 01/01/2009 06:22 - United States

Today, I celebrated the new year. Alone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 236

You deserved it 5 316

By garfwebba - 03/01/2010 01:17 - United States

Today, it's my birthday. My boyfriend didn't get me a present. He did, however, get me a card from our cat. He signed it "Have a purrrrfect birthday." Then he left to go to work. I was alone all day long. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 480

You deserved it 6 631

Sounds wonderful

By Loner - 05/12/2021 14:00

Today, I spent the thirty second consecutive day in a row seeing no one but my cat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 814

You deserved it 239

By CatLover<3 - 18/06/2013 23:27 - United States - Cibolo

Today, I tried to explain to my cat why I was single, but then I realized why. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 524

You deserved it 21 931

Sick move, bro

By jlw1998 - 25/04/2016 04:36 - United States - Dallas

Today, I bought my girlfriend a cat. I now have a cat and no girlfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 494

You deserved it 4 510

noncomposmentis 6

Monday 9 January 2012 18:53

Better stay single than to be in an unhappy relationship.

Savra_fml 17

Monday 9 January 2012 19:20

That is a terrible attempt at a joke, spelling, and grammar.....all in one.

Comments

geod69 8

Monday 9 January 2012 22:47

I'm a dog man

Akharr01 5

Monday 9 January 2012 22:52

I'm so happy for you!! But how does your cat feel??

attaboy368 20

Monday 9 January 2012 22:53

Did your cats get you anything nice to celebrate the day?

eatsleepjb 8

Monday 9 January 2012 23:01

At least it's only a year...some people have been cat ladys for their whole life!

eatsleepjb 8

Tuesday 10 January 2012 0:26

*ladies..yes I beat the grammar natzies to it!

eatsleepjb 8

Tuesday 10 January 2012 2:00

Wow fail lol ***Nazis

Jewnut 0

Monday 9 January 2012 23:06

I like being single

kitkatknicknack 12

Monday 9 January 2012 23:55

I don't :P

Nolnah 14

Monday 9 January 2012 23:15

you guys gunna have ice cream cake?

kimmi41509 10

Monday 9 January 2012 23:23

I love cats :3

Chloeee1995 1

Monday 9 January 2012 23:29

Pshhh that's not an FML! That's a like!

silentspilla 0

Monday 9 January 2012 23:38

bitch u fukn crazy, EHARMONY that shit so ur cats rnt as pathetic as u r

Christianf95 5

Monday 9 January 2012 23:51

Keep your head up. Things will get better

Keywords

Miscellaneous Embarrassing Awkward Sleep Work Love Dating Annoying Am I overreacting? Health Parents Mental health Furniture Kids Friends Gross Public freakouts Fight Neighbours Cops Drugs Relatable Medication Animals Dogs Teenagers Ironic Video games Gamers Zoom

The Top

Today, I brought home my new boyfriend, who happens to have an eyepatch. Despite repeatedly telling them not to, even threatening punishment, my daughters, ages 9 and 11, would not stop calling him "Cyclops." He’s mad at me for this. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 055

You deserved it 365

Today, I had to quickly back out of a Skype call between me and three coworkers because my fiancée came home from work in tears. When things had calmed down, I re-entered the call to find them unaware I had returned, saying how glad they were I had left because they all secretly despise me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 876

You deserved it 2 095

The Top

Today, I went to a barbecue and noticed a girl that I had be interested in. When I walked up to ask how she was doing I noticed she had some BBQ sauce on her face. Jokingly I licked my thumb and reach to remove it. It turned out to be a scab from a pimple she had popped earlier. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 621

You deserved it 59 154

Today, I got the ending to Breaking Bad spoiled for me by a cashier while I was buying the final season box-set. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 897

You deserved it 4 280

Today, I realized that I've been using the wrong name for a coworker for the past 6 months. I just found out their real name when I saw their name tag. FML

I agree, your life sucks 302

You deserved it 749

Today, I drunkenly hooked up with my friend. Two weeks before Valentine's day. She expects me to buy her a present because we've known each other for a while, and apparently thinks it's more than a drunk hookup. FML

I agree, your life sucks 360

You deserved it 1 842

Today, I came home tired and hungry from work. I put my feet up and sat down with a big bowl of chips and salsa. I thought I must have been really hungry because my regular no-name salsa tasted way better than usual. I looked down to examine the jar. Looks like I like the taste of mold. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 033

You deserved it 13 942

Today, while making my daily offering of turd to the porcelain throne, I took out my phone and started playing a game. I suddenly felt a tickling sensation on my leg, and I freaked out as I saw hundreds of ants had emerged from behind the toilet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 436

You deserved it 4 360

Same thing different taste

Happy New Year to all the cats out there

Check out Hank Pecker's Chadvice

Sounds wonderful

Sick move, bro

Top comments

Comments