Miscellaneous: Today, it's my birthday. I got a phone call from my high school...

By Snurkles - 07/07/2011 12:19 - Canada

Today, it's my birthday. I got a phone call from my high school bully, to remind me that he'll always be able to find me and do whatever he wants to me. He does this every year. I turn 34 today. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 109

You deserved it 7 087

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Same thing different taste

By hopeless - 08/04/2011 15:03

Today, is my birthday. Everyone forgot except my stalker. He rang the door bell the second it turned 12:00. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 572

You deserved it 3 998

By Anonymous - 20/11/2010 05:49 - United States

Today, it was my birthday. The only person that remembered was my creepy stalker. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 179

You deserved it 3 293

By andi0804 - 05/08/2009 01:33 - United States

Today, it was my birthday. The only call I received was from my stalker, who sang happy birthday with a japanese accent and asked if he could be my "special present". FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 881

You deserved it 3 588

Unforgettable

By Anonymous - 21/08/2020 11:05 - Australia

Today, it's my birthday, I once again had to remind my best friend of this fact, like I have every year for the past 20 years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 264

You deserved it 359

The one that got away

By Anonymous - 25/09/2019 18:00 - United States

Today, the only person who remembered my birthday was my stalker ex. He left condoms, birth control, furry handcuffs, and a lingerie set in my mailbox, with a note saying to prepare for our anniversary. We went out for a week. In sixth grade. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 159

You deserved it 161

It's the thought that counts

By Not a day over 35 - 18/06/2013 13:06 - United States - Anchorage

Today, I turned 29. To celebrate, my office got me a cake that read "Happy 38th!!" The "theme" of the "party" was 'Not a day over 35!' I waited all day for someone to tell me it was all a prank, but nobody did. I spent my lunch hour crying in my car. Happy birthday to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 687

You deserved it 5 833

By thanks - 02/05/2014 18:20 - United States - San Francisco

Today, it's my 21st birthday. I got a call from my deadbeat dad, who I thought had finally mellowed and had something nice to say. Nope; he just told me I'm 21 years a disappointment, then hung up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 003

You deserved it 3 524

By Plume - 23/12/2008 07:43 - France

Today, it's my birthday. My ex just sent me a text. I read it, happy he had remembered. He wanted me to know he has a new girlfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 652

You deserved it 2 475

By justwantsomeillusionofjustice - 14/08/2017 07:00 - United States - Klamath Falls

Today, I stumbled across my school bully on Facebook. She's a successful business owner and engaged to be married. I can't land a job and am hopelessly single. The b***h that served as the catalyst for my depression and suffered no repercussions is getting married on my birthday. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 122

You deserved it 727

Close to me

By Furnando - 06/01/2023 00:00

Today, I called my dad asking him to wish me a happy birthday. Yay. FML

I agree, your life sucks 750

You deserved it 1 157

TheEpicFoo 0

Thursday 7 July 2011 18:47

That's one determined bully.

worldcupcheer17 0

Thursday 7 July 2011 18:48

call the cops he's a creepy ass stalker lmao

Comments

poostool 5

Thursday 7 July 2011 20:09

why answer the phone?

J1hill33 12

Thursday 7 July 2011 20:10

Happy Birthday!!!

raphanne_fml 33

Thursday 7 July 2011 20:13

I hope things get better for you and yeah...happy birthday! :)

utvols11 0

Thursday 7 July 2011 20:14

cry about it. call yourself a man?

laxitup41 0

Thursday 7 July 2011 20:17

change your number

catatonicsleep 17

Thursday 7 July 2011 20:17

I think he has realized that its an empty threat and just finds it annoying that the guy still does it...

aaronruark 2

Thursday 7 July 2011 20:18

stomp out bullying tell his parents lol fyl

cinderella2122 0

Thursday 7 July 2011 20:19

call the police. This is not acceptable

shinynickel7XXX 0

Thursday 7 July 2011 20:21

I bet you were in band when you were in High school..

xxmollyxx 25

Thursday 7 July 2011 20:22

Wow what an incredible loser he is. At least be happy you've moved on with your life and he obviously hasn't.

Keywords

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The Top

Today, I was at the gym on the elliptical. Feeling proud of myself for finishing a very intense workout, I looked to my left to see that the maintenance guy fixing the machine next to me had burned more calories testing the machine than I did during my entire workout. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 579

You deserved it 5 576

Today, I met a really attractive guy outside of a club. We came back to my apartment and had sex. Afterward, we both fell asleep. I woke up and found 20 dollars on my nightstand that wasn't there before. He thought I was a prostitute, and apparently a cheap one. FML

I agree, your life sucks 74 487

You deserved it 38 932

The Top

Today, I had to pretend to give birth in a play. I wanted to make it a realistic as possible but ended up crapping myself on stage by accident. FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 177

You deserved it 29 819

Today, I realised that my husband's vows were actually the love speech from 'When Harry Met Sally'. This was made even more humiliating when I discovered that he hadn't even come up with the idea himself, he had seen it in an episode of Scrubs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 854

You deserved it 5 122

Today, our eleven year-old Chihuahua died in his sleep. Yesterday, the vet sent him home with us, saying he had mild congestion, and should be fine in a week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 994

You deserved it 81

Today, my mom called me into the living room to say that she had something important to tell me. She then explained how she and my dad had "talked things over" and wanted me to know that they accept me and love me no matter what. Apparently my mom thinks I'm lesbian. I'm not. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 146

You deserved it 3 213

Today, I went to my gynecologist's for a check-up. After the doctor checked me I went to the bathroom. It turns out the walls aren't soundproofed, because I could hear the doctor telling his assistant, "God! How did she ever find a husband?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 473

You deserved it 2 841

Today, and like most days, I spend my day pretending to be happy just so other people won’t suspect anything, then as soon as I get home I just collapse on the sofa miserable, and eventually fall asleep only to wake up the next day to do it all over again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 259

You deserved it 214