Miscellaneous: Today, it was my 18th birthday. Nobody said anything. Gillette...

By Lost - 14/01/2010 15:57 - United States

Today, it was my 18th birthday. Nobody said anything. Gillette sent me a free razor though. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 291

You deserved it 3 151

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Same thing different taste

By BirthdayTeeth - 16/06/2009 11:14 - United Arab Emirates

Today, it was my 18th birthday. I got one thing: a fancy electric toothbrush from my little sister. I would say I'm happy to have something rather than nothing, except, for as long as the toothbrush works, there will be a Hannah Montana concert going on in my mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 995

You deserved it 4 249

Alexa, play "Unhappy Birthday" by The Smiths

By Anonymous - 25/04/2022 04:00 - United States - Brookline

Today, it was my birthday. Nobody said anything, not even my Facebook friends, who probably got a notification about it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 869

You deserved it 173

By same - 21/11/2015 06:39 - United States - Palo Alto

Today, my boyfriend decided to gift me soap, a razor, and deodorant for my birthday. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 798

You deserved it 6 878

By random123 - 29/11/2009 05:16 - United States

Today, it was my birthday. My boyfriend was kind enough to give me prescription strength deodorant. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 160

You deserved it 7 760

You forgetting something?

By Anonymous - 22/05/2022 20:00 - United States - North Miami Beach

Today, it was my birthday. My family usually gives me a financial gift, but didn't this time and said nothing about it. I cooked my own birthday dinner without help, then washed everyone's dishes. I got my own cake and ate it alone because they were too busy getting drunk. Nobody bothered to sing Happy Birthday either. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 140

You deserved it 154

By bdaygirl - 03/12/2009 07:33 - United States

Today, I turned eighteen. Thinking I was going to get a big present from my parents on this special day, I eagerly unwrapped my present. They got me a bag of M and M's. Last year I got flannel bed sheets. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 938

You deserved it 4 730

By dentistftw - 08/08/2009 04:06 - United States

Today, it's my 22nd birthday. The only person who remembered was the dentist who sent me a postcard in the mail. I stopped going to him four years ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 978

You deserved it 2 901

By amber - 19/04/2012 18:00 - United States - Saint Paul

Today, my boyfriend gave me acne cream for my birthday. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 737

You deserved it 4 782

By Anonymous - 31/05/2014 07:24 - United States

Today, it was my birthday. The only person who remembered was my dad who got me a phone charger for my car, which I didn't even need because he got me the same exact thing last year. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 720

You deserved it 4 061

Sweet Sixteen

By Anonymous - 17/09/2021 13:59 - Netherlands

Today, it's my 16th birthday. My parents forgot about it, and planned a weekend out of town. I was alone on my birthday. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 082

You deserved it 97

aero_fml 0

Thursday 14 January 2010 20:17

It's actually a decent razor...

pariah13 0

Thursday 14 January 2010 20:19

I got one for my 18th birthday also. how weird.

Comments

doctorr_fml 9

Thursday 14 January 2010 23:48

happy birthday dude

Aha09 1

Thursday 14 January 2010 23:50

I thought Gillette sent those at sixteen? LOL My friend told me about getting one for his sixteenth birthday last year... Happy birthday, OP! *

dullsville 0

Thursday 14 January 2010 23:50

happy birthday

boatkicker 4

Thursday 14 January 2010 23:58

Yay. Thank you!

Laxloverr24 0

Friday 15 January 2010 0:02

HAPPY BIRTHDAY ! :)

susieKiute 0

Friday 15 January 2010 0:08

omg i got one too for my 18th bday!

LauraTheKiwi 0

Friday 15 January 2010 0:10

HAPPY BIRTHDAY. :D. Surprise partay? With razor? :L

evilzara 0

Friday 15 January 2010 0:16

awww well happy birthday !!

MrPresidentBoss1 0

Friday 15 January 2010 0:25

They sent me one too. How do they know? I used a regular razor with one blade and cut my freakin lip.

MDNL 0

Friday 15 January 2010 0:28

looks like som1 wants u 2 cut urself, lol Fyl

Keywords

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The Top

Today, I came home early from work. My boyfriend and I live together. I open the door and I found my best friend watching TV on the couch, wearing lingerie. The room smelled like sex. She acted irrational and defensive, and had the audacity to ask what I was doing here. Bitch, I live here. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 837

You deserved it 143

Today, a friend asked me if I'd buy him some condoms because he's too shy to buy them himself. I obliged and whilst queuing at the till to buy them I felt someone tap my shoulder. I turned around to see my fiancée glaring at me. We don't use condoms. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 976

You deserved it 6 824

The Top

Today, my mother told me that she and my father aren't coming to my wedding if my estranged brother who stopped talking to me two years ago isn't invited. She claims they don't want to choose sides. Brother: 1. Me: 0. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 968

You deserved it 3 257

Today, my husband is in the garden smashing a tree stump with a sledgehammer because our 22 year-old daughter brought her first serious boyfriend home. He’s my husband's boss, a man-whore who has been bragging about all the nasty stuff his new girlfriend does to him in bed, unaware of who her dad was. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 014

You deserved it 106

Today, I found out why my boyfriend doesn't want me to get a full-time job, despite us needing the money. He's scared that I'll cheat on him with one of my coworkers, to get back at him for doing it a few years ago. I never knew he cheated on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 643

You deserved it 89

Today, I gave my virgin boyfriend his first ever blowjob. I was expecting we’d move on to full sex straight away, but he was weird about it. I asked what was wrong, and he was confused why men are obsessed with blowjobs, because the one I just gave wasn’t that good. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 051

You deserved it 629

Today, I got marinara sauce on my new white shirt. I went in my desk for my Tide-To-Go pen and started using it on the spot. Turns out orange highlighters look a lot like Tide-To-Go pens when you don't look closely enough. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 585

You deserved it 50 575

Today, I was sitting in my bedroom relaxing when I heard my little sister and my brother. Thinking it was cute they were talking again, I was listening. They were not just "talking", they were making plans on how to kill me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 829

You deserved it 3 240

Same thing different taste

Alexa, play "Unhappy Birthday" by The Smiths

You forgetting something?

Sweet Sixteen

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