Where on Earth do you work?

By Anonymous - 26/08/2012 23:39 - Canada - Mississauga

Spicy
Today, the office I work at put up a "No Masturbating at Desks" sign. I'm disappointed by this, not because I usually whack off at my desk, but because enough people do that there needs to be a sign against it. FML
I agree, your life sucks 33 397
You deserved it 4 294
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Top comments

alicette_fml 12

I feel bad for the guy that got caught doing it xD

217 6

Comments

cr3ativity 15

It's gonna be pretty hard now. Before, it was quite soft, or /should I say, flaccid?/ Baa- dum. Tss~

5 60
EvilPotato 14

I know the times are tough but still, masturbating on the job is like getting paid to touch yourself.

37 1
alphaskater09 9

The office I work at puts up signs like that just to mess with the new guys/girls. There was one about masturbation too.

10 2
LiterOfCola 16

Do that that* lol

1 1
klovemachine 24

That's a stiff penalty :D

14 0
GirlYouNasty 11

Who's your favorite Little Rascal? Is it Alfalfa? Or is it SPANKY?

3 1
PYLrulz 17

Cum on, it can't get any worse, can it?

7 1
Awkward_Science 2

The people that caused that sign are a bunch of whack jobs.

7 0
Barr3lR0ll 9

if you don't usually ********** at work, does that mean you sometimes do?

5 0
Googolman 29

The question is, how did they find out?

5 1
putloginhere 6

People i guess ********** at their desks. So theres a sign if you didnt understand the FML

42 4
vocaloidtiger 12

Oh, I'm sorry, did you not get the clearly explained FML that everyone else seems to have understood?

67 5
RedPillSucks 31

He needs the abridged version.

16 0
airforce987 20

WHAT COUNTRY YOU FROM? What? WHAT AIN'T NO COUNTRY I EVER HEARD OF. THEY SPEAK ENGLISH IN WHAT? What? I- SAY IT AGAIN. SAY WHAT AGAIN! I DARE YOU, I DOUBLE DARE YOU ************ SAY WHAT ONE MORE GODDAM TIME!

8 16
quite_bored 9

95, shut the **** up.

14 4
airforce987 20

Wow you all fail for not getting the Pulp Fiction reference.

7 0
lukemack 4

You people who commented on his are twats his saying what? In disbelief not because he doesn't understand

6 19
airforce987 20

WHY U DELETE MY AWESOME PULP FICTION REFERENCE!?

0 0
RochelleRedvines 8

116 ...What?

14 3
EagorLuvsBigFoot 8

No, I believe this is one of those times where people who think they're going to have first comment rush to write something completely not needed or dumb. Alas, #1 beat him to it

6 2
alicette_fml 12

I feel bad for the guy that got caught doing it xD

217 6
Hiimhaileypotter 52

But why would he be masturbating at his desk anyway? He's being paid to work, not jack off.

39 2
Mister_Triangle 21

The plot twist: their job is editing **** movies

75 0
FarSide 22

Make no mistake... by the 8th time of the work day, masturbating can be WORK.

22 1
crazyladydaisy 4

I find it odd that he said he "usually" doesn't, damn.

36 0
tabbycat2007 22

Actually he says not because he usually does it.

1 2
gingerwithsoul_fml 6

And I feel bad for the janitor that cleans the floors...

22 0
cr3ativity 15

Thats quite disappointing. On a second thought, what kind of office is there where employees have time to pull the wiener? /Just you wait, soon there'll be a sign that says "No More Sexy Times in the Copy Room"./

152 1
AbstraktThoughts 13

Apparently, the director of KONY 2012 had enough time to pull out his wiener while on the clock :p haha

32 2
MikeOxxbig 1

Every job. How long do you think it takes?

0 3
hilda_kitty 16

Honestly, I don't even know how they find the time to do that. On the other hand, I was at the cinema and I saw a sign that said "no taxidermy." No, I'm not ******** you. People do things they shouldn't be doing in public everywhere.

1 0
pcentral 17

Wrong. So many kinds of wrong. Who would even do that? Disgusting people...

110 11
menacingsprite 3

Agreed that is something private that should be done at private times.

10 3
FtP_Benihana 0

Next time your stopped at a red light, look around at some of the people in their cars, you'll be surprised.

12 2
thiscrazything 1

I guess that's why you are the head master.

11 0
jenniiienyc 5

Where would you even buy signs that say that, haha:)

18 88
cr3ativity 15

You make them? Like put in some word art, put in a picture of a water gun squirting. Then print it out.

86 0
buca100 4

I can not believe I have to actually say this: THEY MADE ONE. Wow. O.o

7 3
PhishloverA 14

#67 it does show here but that's mean. I'm sure she's a very nice and pretty girl

2 9
GVirdi 11

A mans gotta do what a mans gotta do

24 42
clueless05 12

Hey, it could have been a woman too :/

29 4
99megster 15

I don't think masturbating would be referred to as 'whacking off' if it was a girl.

5 33
Dracoboxer357 35

^ No, but Op never said the signs were put up because He was masturbating at work. I suspect there are both males and females in his office setting (safe to presume anyways), and the signs were for everyone collectively. His use of the words "whack off" was only in reference to himself not participating.

23 2
zandalee 19

Unless she bought her little pink lady finger to work... And everyone just thought that noise was an electric pencil sharpener...

22 1
Ugi 26

7 - A man can damned well wait until he gets home for hell's sake! Some things you just don't need to walk in on during the work day.

5 2
rainbowteehee 6

Yeah it could have been a women, a womens got to do what a women's got to do

1 1
Mizuy 7

It'd have been more subtle to block **** sites.

32 7
A7XCamaro 19

Then people will just go on **** sites with their phones.

21 0
laden_swallow09 34

Or just use their brains and imagine, or has that gone the way of the Betamax, too?

24 0
JustAnotherKid4U 5

Its impossible to block all the **** sites. Theres an infinite supply

11 1
zandalee 19

No one said it wasn't an entertaining world...

12 3
vocaloidtiger 12

47 ~ You're right: No one ever said that. It really is an entertaining place we live in... But nothing's perfect. Our world is far from it.

1 0
coughyochick 7

Work is stressful man. And since they can't workout halfway through the day. Whacking it is the second best thing

5 23
zandalee 19

No actually having sex with someone else in the stationary cupboard is.

18 2