Kids: Today, it was my daughter's birthday. She had been wanting a...

By Anonymous - 20/01/2011 03:44 - United States

Today, it was my daughter's birthday. She had been wanting a cat for a long time, so I went to the animal shelter and got an orange one. As soon as she saw it, she ran upstairs screaming, "GINGER! GINGER!" She refuses to come downstairs until I get rid of "the soulless creature." FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 053

You deserved it 8 334

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Same thing different taste

Disappointing

By Muon66 - 11/06/2021 03:59

Today, I showed my 5-year-old son a photo with a ginger cat and her 6 newborn kittens. I forgot to tell my son the cat mom is not the male ginger cat at home, despite them looking exactly same. His excitement became deep sorrow and a tantrum when he figured out that we didn't get half a dozen kittens. FML

I agree, your life sucks 385

You deserved it 608

Fatal decision

By juliette - 07/02/2015 05:13 - United States - Astoria

Today, my mom called me an attention seeker and threw a bitch fit because my cat "decided" to die on her birthday. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 791

You deserved it 2 529

By KornyKid - 21/02/2016 08:01 - United States - Citrus Heights

Today, I got a new cat for my birthday. It ate my bird right when we got home, then it ran away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 758

You deserved it 4 292

By vishuzzbabe77 - 22/08/2011 06:04 - United States

Today, I bought a Halloween costume for my cat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 443

You deserved it 41 655

By unloved - 01/10/2009 14:25 - United States

Today, during an argument with my daughter she screamed "everyone hates you!" and stormed off. I flopped down on the couch in frustration where the cat jumped on my lap. "You love me, don't you?" I asked the cat. She crapped on my leg and went to my daughter's room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 351

You deserved it 6 850

By prevostsrocklike - 11/05/2009 12:38 - United States

Today, I gave my wife a cat. The first thing it did when it got out of the box was scratch the shit out of my leg. Next, it ran up to my wife and purred. She said, "Good cat." FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 998

You deserved it 10 554

Sick move, bro

By jlw1998 - 25/04/2016 04:36 - United States - Dallas

Today, I bought my girlfriend a cat. I now have a cat and no girlfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 493

You deserved it 4 509

Mr Whiskers takes priority

By Anonymous - 07/12/2021 16:58

Today, my daughter forgot my birthday. When I asked her, she said she'd remembered my birthday, but was too busy at work to acknowledge it. However, she did have time to post a message on Facebook, wishing a happy birthday to her cat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 946

You deserved it 127

Bathtime

By BadCatOwner - 25/06/2023 10:00

Today, my 11 year-old daughter claimed I'm a terrible cat parent. Why? Because in the 4 months that we've had the cat, I haven't given him a bath. Our strictly indoor kitten lives in attack mode, and would paint the walls with my blood if I attempted it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 717

You deserved it 150

You are the chosen one

By Me. - 16/12/2022 03:00

Today, a cat appeared in my basement. I have cats, but not an orange one. I don't know where he came in from. I can hardly afford the two cats and dogs I already have, so keeping him is not an option, not to mention he could have a disease. But it's winter, and I feel like crap for having to kick him out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 983

You deserved it 242

jaeyuuji 1

Thursday 20 January 2011 9:09

I guess she hates oranges too.

gozar_fml 1

Thursday 20 January 2011 9:10

Orange cats are the best!

Comments

zaryia 4

Friday 12 August 2011 3:50

I have a little ginger can i love her. her name is orange kitty. yes i am so origional. lol you raised a monster

maverick1752 16

Friday 12 August 2011 8:13

no offense, but ur daughters a bitch

lallafral 1

Thursday 1 September 2011 18:01

What a jerk... I'm a ginger

missashzilla 17

Wednesday 7 September 2011 22:55

Haha. You have an amazing child.

realportlandian 2

Sunday 11 March 2012 8:49

You have an amazing amount of bitchiness ginger hater one day me and my people will take your soul

CupcakeNinjaXD 0

Thursday 20 October 2011 21:21

D: poor kitty!

Saturn_fml 23

Wednesday 26 October 2011 2:15

You should just dye her hair orange, give her a mirror and tell her not to make a mess when she (hopefully) kills herself.

erikadanielle 0

Wednesday 9 November 2011 2:29

Offensive :|

xxDefiantxx 0

Friday 25 November 2011 21:35

*Chris Crocker voice* LEAVE GINGERS ALONE!!

alilmonster 1

Wednesday 30 November 2011 20:34

Parent fail

dallasjlynnl 0

Monday 5 December 2011 13:47

Hey old lady **** your daughter gingers aren't ****** soulless your daughters a bitch

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The Top

Today, my wife came home from work early and told me she'd been fired. She was really upset so I told her how much she means to me and how much I love her to help cheer her up. She then told me she was caught getting it on with another employee. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 376

You deserved it 2 502

Ahoy ship's boys and girls ! Today we're heading to France. Be ready to face rain, storm and beer because Lille is welcoming us, and believe me, it's not Los Angeles. Do you all have your raincoats? -Bonjour ! First of all, present yourself ma jol...

I agree, your life sucks 14

You deserved it 15

The Top

Today, I drove to buy new sneakers to work out and lose weight. Coming out of the store, I saw someone had parked too close to me. I had to beg a stranger to back my car out for me, because no matter how I tried, I couldn't get into the driver's seat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 443

You deserved it 10 197

Today, my dad had a midlife crisis in the grocery store over his football career in high school. So he decided pelting me with vegetables and fruits would be a good idea. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 439

You deserved it 1 118

Today, I found out that I'm allergic to shrimp, when I went out for a lunch with my long-term crush after I finally got the courage to ask her out. She's really into seafood. A little while into the afternoon I started to feel itchy. She ended up scratching my back all night. FML

I agree, your life sucks 668

You deserved it 130

Today, after a night of drinking, I awoke in the early hours of the morning to a sight of my roommate playing with my penis. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 236

You deserved it 300

Today, I bought a device that plays a high-pitched sound to teach my dog to quit barking. She's smart enough to learn that as long as she barks loud enough and long enough, she can't hear it. Quite the opposite effect to what I was anticipating. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 729

You deserved it 6 777

Today, I was making out with a guy I really like. Midway through, he stopped and said he had to sneeze. After waiting several seconds, he said the urge went away and we kept making out. Ten seconds later, he violently sneezed in my open mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 905

You deserved it 5 152