Animals: Today, it was my first day working at a milking parlor. As I...

By abi_vet_student - 13/02/2009 12:42 - United Kingdom

Today, it was my first day working at a milking parlor. As I crouched behind a cow to put on an udder cluster, I looked up and gasped just in time for the cow to crap on my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 869

You deserved it 7 087

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 20/04/2011 07:27 - South Africa

Today, I'm a student vet. Part of my holiday work is to gain experience working at a dairy. A cow came on to the platform for me to inject her udder. As I was bent over, she decided to take a dump. Onto my left eyeball. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 096

You deserved it 6 208

By vetstudentdream - 15/04/2017 22:00 - Australia - Bellbowrie

Today, I found out what it feels like to have a cow take a large, flatulent shit with my arm still elbow-deep inside their rectum. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 786

You deserved it 837

I love the countryside

By disturbed - 01/06/2014 01:53 - Ireland

Today, I was hit in the face by the placenta of a cow that had just given birth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 998

You deserved it 5 708

By Anonymous - 01/04/2016 18:30 - Canada - Toronto

Today, my date took me to visit his farm. As we were walking, a wild rabbit darted past me and startled me. I tripped and fell face first into cow dung. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 731

You deserved it 2 734

Glamorous...

By KlutzyFarmGirl - 12/06/2018 14:30 - United States

Today, I went into the farm where I work. Within the first 30 minutes I slipped on a fresh cow pie and broke my ankle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 368

You deserved it 371

By anonymous - 11/11/2018 13:30

Today, I broke my glasses. How did I break my glasses? A cow kicked me in the face at work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 977

You deserved it 257

Face it!

By MooCow - 13/07/2011 03:13 - United States

Today, my best friend told me to face my fear of cows and hop over the fence in with them. This resulted in me being chased by a raging cow, and thrusting myself head first over a fence. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 598

You deserved it 15 791

By Anonymous - 30/07/2011 00:31 - United States

Today, while walking home from work, a young teenage girl ran up behind me and dumped a carton of milk on my head. She said, "The cow master baptizes you!" and then ran in the opposite direction, cackling madly. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 432

You deserved it 4 172

Nature is healing

By kat, ACT - 20/12/2009 14:37 - United States

Today, while driving, we pulled up at a set of traffic lights next to a huge truck with live animals inside. Curious as to exactly what animal, I wound down my window to see if I could hear them, just in time for the truck to take off and cow shit to fly in my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 485

You deserved it 11 674

Nightmare Fuel

By anon - 01/06/2018 01:30

Today, at work, I had a coughing fit so bad I actually shat myself. What felt like a gallon of liquid crap poured down my trouser leg onto the floor. I work in a competitive office and this happened in front of 30 spiteful coworkers who love posting pics online. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 672

You deserved it 376

Rayn4u_fml 0

Friday 13 February 2009 16:41

You gasped...as in...your mouth was wide open for reception?

revolution_fml 0

Friday 13 February 2009 16:52

Shit...literally.

Comments

kbarko 0

Friday 13 February 2009 16:09

There is no way that could be true

Rayn4u_fml 0

Friday 13 February 2009 16:41

You gasped...as in...your mouth was wide open for reception?

revolution_fml 0

Friday 13 February 2009 16:52

Shit...literally.

supafly208 0

Friday 13 February 2009 18:34

hhmm..grassy crap in my face or donkeykicked in the balls.... decisions decisions

Obsidianhawk 0

Saturday 14 February 2009 2:24

Wow, after reading this I feel so much better about my day.

FMLRabbit 0

Saturday 14 February 2009 17:11

That`s just terrible luck. F your life indeed.

sillypun 0

Wednesday 18 February 2009 2:00

you work in a milk parlor. FYL

alwaysalady 0

Wednesday 18 February 2009 22:42

Where do you live? Just curous, cuz I've never seen a milking parlor.

FlavorfulUnicorn 4

Thursday 19 February 2009 16:47

That is horrible. But still really funny.

Keywords

Awkward Miscellaneous Neighbours Wanker Lonely Halloween Party Love Jealousy Argument Family Fight Animals Cats Parents Sports Health Embarrassing Shopping Medication Anger issues Birds Weddings Pranks TikTok YouTube Dogs Cute AITA Work

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I agree, your life sucks 1 024

You deserved it 129

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I agree, your life sucks 27 033

You deserved it 3 546

It's hard to go back once you've taken matters too far... What was your worst slip?

I agree, your life sucks 341

You deserved it 678