Miscellaneous: Today, like every other day for many years, I have a phobia of...

By Elisa_LmR - 03/01/2014 23:28 - France

Today, like every other day for many years, I have a phobia of bananas. This evening, the phobia came to a head when I had a nightmare in which I was stabbed to death by a gang of walking bananas. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 548

You deserved it 8 630

November 11: Memories and smiles
Historical anecdotes with a light touch to commemorate with a respectful smile. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By Twomanybananas - 23/01/2017 16:00

Today, I found a banana on my bed. It was black and shriveled because I accidentally left it there after I thought I finished the whole bushel I bought last week. I've been sleeping in my bed all week and didn't notice. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 614

You deserved it 3 885

By aelia_oups - 31/12/2012 22:09 - France - Taverny

Today, as I have been for 10 years, I'm allergic to fruit. After an argument with my mother, she yelled, "Here, have a banana and go kill yourself!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 334

You deserved it 7 539

Why so serious?

By DwarfFrog - 18/06/2012 11:38 - United States

Today, my grandmother threatened to kill herself with a banana. She then got angry with me when I didn't attempt to get the banana away from her. My mom punished me because I didn't take the situation seriously enough. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 442

You deserved it 3 390

By Anonymous - 30/01/2010 13:16 - United States

Today, I was walking to school. When I was about halfway there, someone put a gun to the back of my head and told me to give him all my money. As I slowly turned around, I saw it was my dad putting a banana to my head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 424

You deserved it 5 579

By Operation Yewtree here I come - 26/09/2014 20:40 - United Kingdom - London

Today, I was sitting on a bench at the local park, eating a banana. A guy old enough to be my grandfather walked by, turned to look at me, then said "Young man, I wish I were that banana." He walked away, and I almost blacked out choking on it in shock. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 367

You deserved it 4 214

Meme life

By Anonymous - 02/02/2023 22:00

Today, I tripped on an actual banana peel and fell over in front of my crush. I'm pretty sure that's the closest I'll ever come to being a meme. FML

I agree, your life sucks 663

You deserved it 143

By Anonymous - 29/04/2012 09:45 - Canada - Thompson

Today, at a concert, I got into a fight with a man in a banana suit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 331

You deserved it 22 267

By Jaws - 10/02/2011 16:09 - France

Today, I got slapped in the face by my girlfriend with a banana skin, because I finished up the chocolate cake. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 775

You deserved it 38 591

Face Your Fears

By Broc'n dreams - 06/02/2017 16:00 - New Zealand - Auckland

Today, I woke up screaming "FUCK OFF!" because I had a dream that someone threw broccoli through my window. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 520

You deserved it 784

By Anonymous - 19/11/2017 01:30

Today, I actually slipped on a banana peel, cartoon-style, breaking my kneecap and dislocating my hip. I will never hear the end of this. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 124

You deserved it 364

rockne93 17

Saturday 4 January 2014 5:25

Orange you glad you aren't afraid of bananas, guys?

WFFLPWND 10

Saturday 4 January 2014 5:25

You must peel very bad... (I'm so sorry I have to)

Comments

dolphinlvr7 24

Monday 15 June 2015 12:52

That's from Zack and cody

fantasyworld 37

Monday 7 December 2015 22:44

Wasn't Zack or Cody afraid of bananas on Suite life of Zack and Cody?

unholyswiss 19

Tuesday 23 February 2016 5:45

I just finished making a delicious pan of banana bread. Eat away your fears, OP.

chessdude 8

Monday 4 July 2016 21:23

*cue the vietnam flashbacks*

Keywords

Transportation Poopoo peepee Cars Awkward Dentist Health Shopping My ex Love Cats Animals Work Job interview Clothes Miscellaneous Weird Vacation Holidays Family AITA Am I overreacting? Annoying Parents Funerals Relatable Harassment Engagement Food Ironic Technology

The Top

...

I agree, your life sucks 12

You deserved it 18

Today, I visited the best cafe for the fourth time in a week. I’ve tried not to flirt with the same (hot) barista, I even mentioned my partner, but we chat and joke every time, and get on well. After I said bye and left, I heard a hasty, “Love you, bye.” It's maybe a joke, but he’s a total catch, and I don't know if I can go back there now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 91

You deserved it 439

The Top

Another chance for you to pick your winner of the week. So, who does it for you?

I agree, your life sucks 467

You deserved it 132

Today, the guy I'm seeing and I were having sex. While I was having my orgasm, he looked at me and said "SHHHH!". FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 149

You deserved it 8 181

Today, I got home with my 3 best friends in tow, only to find my husband fast asleep on the sofa, porn playing on his laptop, his boxers around his ankles, and a sticky white mess all down his thigh. I am so beyond mortified I can’t adequately describe how embarrassed I am. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 384

You deserved it 884

Today, I bought a brand new flat screen TV. When I brought it home it didn't work. Furious, I walked into Best Buy and yelled at a guy in a tucked in blue polo and khakis. I asked him why it didn't work and he said he didn't know. I kept screaming. He didn't have a nametag. He didn't work there. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 801

You deserved it 130 484

Today, my dad offered to pay me $40 to wash his car. Needing money to buy a video game, I agreed, and went out in the freezing weather to do the job. I finished the task, only to be paid in Monopoly money. My dad still hasn't gotten over how "funny" his prank was. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 212

You deserved it 3 923

Today, I was developing film at Walmart. It started to get a little warm, so I began taking my sweatshirt off. A creepy old man approached me, saying "You know, usually girls like you are paid to take their clothes off." FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 580

You deserved it 4 340

Same thing different taste

Why so serious?

Meme life

Face Your Fears

Top comments

Comments