Miscellaneous: Today, like every other day for many years, I have a phobia of...

By Elisa_LmR - 03/01/2014 23:28 - France

Today, like every other day for many years, I have a phobia of bananas. This evening, the phobia came to a head when I had a nightmare in which I was stabbed to death by a gang of walking bananas. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 548

You deserved it 8 630

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Same thing different taste

By Twomanybananas - 23/01/2017 16:00

Today, I found a banana on my bed. It was black and shriveled because I accidentally left it there after I thought I finished the whole bushel I bought last week. I've been sleeping in my bed all week and didn't notice. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 614

You deserved it 3 885

By aelia_oups - 31/12/2012 22:09 - France - Taverny

Today, as I have been for 10 years, I'm allergic to fruit. After an argument with my mother, she yelled, "Here, have a banana and go kill yourself!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 334

You deserved it 7 539

Why so serious?

By DwarfFrog - 18/06/2012 11:38 - United States

Today, my grandmother threatened to kill herself with a banana. She then got angry with me when I didn't attempt to get the banana away from her. My mom punished me because I didn't take the situation seriously enough. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 442

You deserved it 3 390

By Anonymous - 30/01/2010 13:16 - United States

Today, I was walking to school. When I was about halfway there, someone put a gun to the back of my head and told me to give him all my money. As I slowly turned around, I saw it was my dad putting a banana to my head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 426

You deserved it 5 579

By Operation Yewtree here I come - 26/09/2014 20:40 - United Kingdom - London

Today, I was sitting on a bench at the local park, eating a banana. A guy old enough to be my grandfather walked by, turned to look at me, then said "Young man, I wish I were that banana." He walked away, and I almost blacked out choking on it in shock. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 368

You deserved it 4 214

Meme life

By Anonymous - 02/02/2023 22:00

Today, I tripped on an actual banana peel and fell over in front of my crush. I'm pretty sure that's the closest I'll ever come to being a meme. FML

I agree, your life sucks 664

You deserved it 143

By Anonymous - 29/04/2012 09:45 - Canada - Thompson

Today, at a concert, I got into a fight with a man in a banana suit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 331

You deserved it 22 268

By Jaws - 10/02/2011 16:09 - France

Today, I got slapped in the face by my girlfriend with a banana skin, because I finished up the chocolate cake. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 776

You deserved it 38 591

Face Your Fears

By Broc'n dreams - 06/02/2017 16:00 - New Zealand - Auckland

Today, I woke up screaming "FUCK OFF!" because I had a dream that someone threw broccoli through my window. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 520

You deserved it 784

By Anonymous - 19/11/2017 01:30

Today, I actually slipped on a banana peel, cartoon-style, breaking my kneecap and dislocating my hip. I will never hear the end of this. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 124

You deserved it 364

rockne93 17

Saturday 4 January 2014 5:25

Orange you glad you aren't afraid of bananas, guys?

WFFLPWND 10

Saturday 4 January 2014 5:25

You must peel very bad... (I'm so sorry I have to)

Comments

SebbyFangirl1124 5

Monday 6 January 2014 6:08

You're afraid of bananas?

Chiikan 3

Monday 6 January 2014 8:13

(Banana in Pajamas) B2: Are you what I'm thinking, B1? B1: I think I am, B2. B1 & B2: IT'S WALKING TIME!!!

connordennen 4

Monday 6 January 2014 12:56

Ring ring ring ring ring ring ring, BANANA PHONE!!

GodSight 2

Monday 6 January 2014 16:37

My question he is that, when they stabbed you - did they stab you with a banana?

effbombbunny 3

Monday 6 January 2014 18:56

banana phobia? what the hell? you are so weird lol. cosidering you are primate that is weird as hell. #darwinism #evolution

azyjazy713 11

Monday 6 January 2014 19:44

Sounds like you need a peanut butter gun

BratOfInsanity 7

Tuesday 7 January 2014 20:24

its okay! my biggest fear is hermit crabs! you're not alone! :)

sanecatlady 13

Wednesday 8 January 2014 1:03

Whatever you do, don't go on Maury to get help for your phobia, if that awful show is even still on the air. What they do is actually show huge close-up videos and then bring out the very thing that the guest is terrified of and the audience laughs hysterically while the phobic runs screaming off the stage. I don't get why they would even come on the show to begin with if they knew what was in store for them... must be fake.