Kids: Today, my 3-year-old missed the toilet. In the time it took me...

By Anonymous - 17/04/2017 08:00 - Australia - Moonee Ponds

Today, my 3-year-old missed the toilet. In the time it took me to get paper towel to clean it up, my one-year-old decided it was the perfect puddle to play in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 191

You deserved it 605

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 08/04/2017 12:00

Today, I was cleaning the litter box and found a large clump. I later found my 3-year-old peeing there instead of in the toilet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 757

You deserved it 604

By jbhadafuckedupday - 15/03/2018 01:30

Today, my 3-year-old came to me very excited because he had gone to the bathroom by himself for the first time. What he did not tell me was that he had shit on the floor, and when I went into the bathroom to check, I slipped on a turd and knocked myself out on the sink. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 093

You deserved it 450

Potty drama

By NeverEndingBathtime_ - 03/08/2017 20:00

Today, my two year-old is being potty trained. He got the gist of it and actually did #1 and #2 in the potty and after our little celebratory dance, I went to get him a cookie (which took me two seconds). I come back to see him covered in shit and pee because he tried to go empty the potty himself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 747

You deserved it 1 093

That's not a child, that's a bio-hazard!

By Anonymous - 08/01/2018 09:00 - United States - Thomasville

Today, I took a shower while my two-year-old slept. In the 30 minutes it took me to shower, get dressed, and go back to his room, he had woken up, taken his pants and diaper off, and smears crap all over himself and his bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 780

You deserved it 818

So sweet

By Mom of 3 - 07/10/2018 15:30

Today, I was washing dishes while my 2-year-old was napping… or so I thought. When I finished and went to check on her, I found she'd taken off her diaper and smeared poop all over the carpet. She must have been up a while because it was everywhere. I spent the next hour scrubbing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 955

You deserved it 435

By TiredMommy - 20/04/2017 18:00 - United States - Southbridge

Today, my 2-year-old son figured out that if he takes his pull-up off and DOESN'T go on the potty, he can pee all over things. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 570

You deserved it 518

By Dafawk - 19/06/2016 20:54

Today, I took my two-year-old out to dinner. During dinner, our son went to the bathroom three times. As we were getting ready to leave he kept saying he had to go potty. He had gone multiple times, so I thought he would be fine. As he stood up, a giant turd fell on the floor in front of everyone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 299

You deserved it 6 509

Shitty situation

By Anonymous - 21/11/2022 22:00

Today, I had explosive diarrhea. I got off the toilet to change my 3 year-old's poopy diaper. He was being stubborn, so I was going to go back to the toilet, which is when he laid down. I thought I could do it. I couldn't. He ran around diaperless as I ran back to the toilet with liquid shit running down my leg. FML

I agree, your life sucks 952

You deserved it 182

Shidding and farding

By Anonymous - 07/09/2021 08:01

Today, I was babysitting my friend's two year-old daughter. Within 15 minutes, she had crawled out of her crib, taken off her diaper, and smooshed her poop in between the cracks in the floor. I put her in the tub, left to get a towel, and came back to her pooping in the tub. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 111

You deserved it 290

By peepants - 04/06/2019 14:00

Today, I was in a public restroom with my one-year old. I had no idea he could reach the lock until he opened the door and ran out. In my haste to catch him, I not only peed all over my pants that were still around my ankles, I faceplanted on the nasty, moist bathroom floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 222

You deserved it 334

RichardPencil 30

Monday 17 April 2017 0:24

That must have really pissed you off!

jtsmommy 11

Monday 17 April 2017 0:26

Been there, done that. Welcome two having two toddlers

Comments

RichardPencil 30

Monday 17 April 2017 0:24

That must have really pissed you off!

bigred121970 10

Monday 17 April 2017 4:17

????

bigred121970 10

Monday 17 April 2017 4:17

It's better to be "Pissed Off" than "Pissed On"

jtsmommy 11

Monday 17 April 2017 0:26

Been there, done that. Welcome two having two toddlers

jtsmommy 11

Monday 17 April 2017 0:26

*to

RichardPencil 30

Monday 17 April 2017 0:30

*Welcome too having Thieu toddlers. YWIA

Glowworm56 26

Monday 17 April 2017 1:30

Sounds like it was a piddle of a puddle to play in.

mattyiscool123 26

Monday 17 April 2017 3:46

Shut up

bigred121970 10

Monday 17 April 2017 4:16

Leave it up to the little kids to do something bigger kids would rather die than do.

pjsr 32

Monday 17 April 2017 4:18

You need to get a litter box in there

Bearsmomma 30

Monday 17 April 2017 10:13

That made me lol on a level unnecessary. Idk why. Very funny!

Argotdroom 21

Monday 17 April 2017 15:20

Two boys? Urine trouble!

RockPrincess26 16

Monday 17 April 2017 20:36

CinemaSins: "Kids." *ding*

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You deserved it 518

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You deserved it 2 587

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I agree, your life sucks 406

You deserved it 111

Today, I went by myself to do a birthday party in a park, dressed as Elsa from Frozen. Everything was going fine until another Elsa and an Anna showed up to a nearby party. The kids then decided I was a fake and pulled my wig off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 052

You deserved it 2 619

Today, I called 911 and got taken to hospital via ambulance after a suicide attempt. When I called my mom, the first thing she asked was, "How much is the ambulance going to cost?" FML

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You deserved it 998

Today, after months of unemployment, I finally started at a new job. The building burnt down on my very first shift. FML

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You deserved it 637

Today, my boyfriend asked how I could go to the bathroom and leave my tampon in at the same time. He didn't realize there are two separate holes. He's 28. FML

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You deserved it 5 009

Same thing different taste

Potty drama

That's not a child, that's a bio-hazard!

So sweet

Shitty situation

Shidding and farding

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