Kids: Today, my 4 year-old daughter's favorite expression became "shit...

By anonymous - 28/07/2011 05:39 - United States

Today, my 4 year-old daughter's favorite expression became "shit balls." FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 436

You deserved it 16 961

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When the campus comes back to life, anecdotes abound between the lecture halls and student parties! More…

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Same thing different taste

By shitface - 25/01/2010 10:18 - Australia

Today, I woke up to my 2-year-old daughter hitting me in the face. She had just pooped her nappy and put her hands down her pants to "feel it squish around." FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 559

You deserved it 3 440

By Noname - 04/12/2008 04:39 - France

Today, my two year old girl said "motherfucker". Everyone laughed, even her grandparents. Our family is insane. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 082

You deserved it 9 224

By applesmama - 17/09/2011 04:36 - United States

Today, my daughter spoke her first words. Her dad had been practicing with her for weeks in secret. She crawled to me and said, "I poop." FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 476

You deserved it 4 686

By Anonymous - 18/04/2014 22:35 - Canada - Concord

Today, my son said his first complete sentence: "Mommy likes shit." Not only will he not stop saying it, I have no idea who taught him to say it in the first place. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 378

You deserved it 4 861

Charming...

By Anonymous - 01/06/2018 15:00

Today, my toddler is starting to realize when she has a dirty diaper. How do I know? She walked up to me with a shit covered hand, saying "Poop Mommy! Poop!!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 370

You deserved it 405

Child's play

By Misbah Akhtar - 21/11/2020 12:59 - United Kingdom - Plymouth

Today, my 6 year-old brought me a card. On it was a turd belonging to my 4 year-old son. She got excited and grossed out, and threw it on the rug. FML

I agree, your life sucks 689

You deserved it 358

By Anonymous - 15/10/2010 00:25 - United States

Today, as I put my 4 year-old daughter in the car seat, she dropped her crayon. She then paused and matter-of-factly said, "Mommy, I don't say 'f***' anymore when I drop things." FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 115

You deserved it 9 203

By NooOOooOO - 11/10/2017 23:15

Today, I learned how artistically talented my daughter is. Unfortunately, her favorite medium to work in is poo. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 036

You deserved it 339

Splosh

By WhosGoingToCleanThisUp - This FML is from back in 2016 but it's good stuff - United Kingdom

Today, my daughter taught me the literal meaning of "When the shit hits the fan." FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 062

You deserved it 1 844

By mom - 26/01/2014 04:29 - United States - Spring

Today, while driving home, my 3-year-old daughter told me she had to poop. I told her that she would have to wait until we got home. When we got home, she pulled down her pants and shat on the floor, because, "I'm home now." FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 934

You deserved it 10 135

MCVelvet1497 3

Thursday 28 July 2011 12:01

Oh, shit balls.

fricknugget 3

Thursday 28 July 2011 12:01

LMFAO it might be me my new one too!!:P

Comments

carsetius 8

Thursday 28 July 2011 18:51

Sucks to be you! Perhaps some needs to take some parent classes

MsMeiriona 2

Thursday 28 July 2011 18:54

so explain to her that is not a nice thing to say, not difficult...

PrimeStarscream 30

Thursday 28 July 2011 18:58

HAHAHAHA!

AnnaVictoriaMBM 8

Thursday 28 July 2011 18:59

lmfao... that's just terrific.

emories_mommy 0

Thursday 28 July 2011 19:09

and where did she get it from.? and who's letting her say it?

kingtootinpootin 3

Thursday 28 July 2011 19:13

i agrre with you 142

iilovecokee 6

Thursday 28 July 2011 19:16

They're just words your kid doesn't understand the meaning of. Kids always seem to finds words that feel good for them to articulate. It doesn't make you any worse of a parent or them any worse of a kid. But once they swear at you personally for the first time, that's when you have to scare the shit balls out of them for doing it. Or you run the risk of having that kid your neighbours, friends, cousins and strangers want to beat for being so damn disrespectful and annoying.