Kids: Today, my 5 year old daughter told me that I needed to stay 50...

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By Lolaa123 - 25/09/2011 04:03 - United States

Today, my 5 year old daughter told me that I needed to stay 50 feet away from her at all times when we were at school, mostly because I didn't hang with the cool parents. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 207

You deserved it 3 864

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Same thing different taste

Teenagers, amirite?

By JustShootMe - 02/11/2020 07:57 - Australia - Gladstone

Today, my daughter told me she would rather hang herself than hang out with me. All I did was remind her to go to bed at a reasonable time to get some sleep for an activity she likes doing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 106

You deserved it 143

By AnonymousCow - 20/09/2016 13:04 - Australia - Perth

Today, I told my daughter that she wasn't allowed to eat in her room, so she sat at the table and glared at me for 10 minutes while she ate. She's 15. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 829

You deserved it 1 905

Sweetie

By Anonymous - 25/02/2025 05:00 - Australia - Brisbane

Today, my youngest daughter was going through separation anxiety when I dropped her off at school. After ten minutes of me comforting her, the teacher said, "C'mon, you have to let Nan go now so you can join in with the class." Ummm, I'm her mum, not her grandparent. FML

I agree, your life sucks 414

You deserved it 123

Whack-a-Mole

By Anonymous - 28/09/2019 02:01

Today, I had to pick my daughter up from pre-school because she repeatedly hit another kid with a stick. Apparently, my parents have been letting her watch violent action movies again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 515

You deserved it 297

The Headmaster Ritual

By angry mama - 21/09/2019 00:01

Today, while picking my daughter up from school, I saw her being beaten by two boys while the teacher stood there doing nothing. I ran to help, but then she pushed one of the boys off her. The teacher then pulled her away, yelled at her and then yelled at me for "not raising my kid right." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 831

You deserved it 140

By Anonymous - 16/12/2010 14:35 - Taiwan

Today, I went to pick up my daughter from preschool. When I got there, I ran to give her a hug. She screamed and ran away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 475

You deserved it 4 548

By divorced - 07/03/2009 20:15 - United States

Today, I was picking up my daughter from my ex-husband's house and his new girlfriend was there. I said to my daughter that it was time to leave and she clung to his girlfriend and said, "Mommy, I don't want to leave." She wasn't talking to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 151 139

You deserved it 10 454

Quite reasonable

By Anonymous - 10/05/2025 15:00 - United States - Riverside

Today, my kids are mad I won’t let them hang out at the “cool” parents house. You know, the house with no rules. I’ve heard way too many horror stories, too many true crime documentaries, plus personal experience, to ever let that happen. I will never EVER trust adults that like to party with kids. FML

I agree, your life sucks 416

You deserved it 134

By Anonymous - 15/10/2012 10:28 - United States - Richmond

Today, I learned from my daughter's teacher that she has been wearing the same shirt for the past few weeks, ever since we had a fight about how I don't pay attention to her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 488

You deserved it 63 334

By DocShadow - 03/12/2013 17:33 - United States - New York

Today, my 4-year-old daughter stood up to a bully in the mall. I was the one who was getting bullied. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 670

You deserved it 8 855

tigerlilypop 7

Sunday 25 September 2011 9:19

Well shit, go chill with them cool parents.

xlorawrz 9

Sunday 25 September 2011 9:22

And she's only five? Imagine the teenage years.

Comments

KennyMcCrmick322 0

Friday 30 September 2011 7:55

You just got owned by a kindergardener....... Well there's always weed ;)

Oneiroi_fml 4

Thursday 15 December 2011 0:17

Sad how superficial society is becoming...

grovervac3000 15

Friday 17 February 2012 3:42

Sounds like my 15 year old brother! ;)

Lena234 8

Tuesday 18 December 2012 4:45

even the young children are now becoming obbsesed with popularity and social status?...*sighh* -__-

judea95 16

Saturday 31 August 2013 10:57

Maybe you should chill with the cool parents

doglover100 28

Sunday 23 February 2014 2:27

Since when we're there cool and uncool parents in kindergarten?

aabbbbeeeeyyy 3

Friday 20 June 2014 5:24

Your kid has some sass there

worldclassrager 39

Wednesday 9 July 2014 11:43

Have your husband pick her up maybe? Or wife?

fantasyworld 37

Tuesday 6 January 2015 3:10

Since when did kindergarteners care about having cool parents?

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The Top

Today, after more than six years of working my ass off, I finally summoned the courage to ask my boss for a raise. She just chuckled, "I'm gonna need you to eat a dick, John." and stared at me unblinking until I awkwardly left. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 700

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Today, I got a text from an unknown number that said, "Are you free tonight?" Thinking it was a friend messing around, I responded with, "Only if you're buying booze and dinner." The reply a few minutes later was, "This is Dr. Peters, your dentist. You missed your appointment today. You need to reschedule." FML

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You deserved it 477

The Top

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You deserved it 2 317

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You deserved it 501

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You deserved it 1 964

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You deserved it 4 743

Today, I tried to make mashed potatoes but then went into another room to wait on them, then forgot about them, ruining my only big pot and a full bag of potatoes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 210

You deserved it 876

Today, I went to Auto Zone because my car was having trouble starting, and I thought it was the battery. The guy checked it with their reader, and confirmed it was dying. Right after he put the battery in, my starter died. I had to get my car towed to the shop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 711

You deserved it 126