By justash12 - 25/08/2013 09:13 - United States - Kearny

Today, my boyfriend and I are on camping vacation. On my way out of the tent, I stepped in a pile of shit. When I told him, he said, "Oh, I couldn't make it to the bathroom last night." The bathroom was a minute walk from our tent. FML
I agree, your life sucks 47 809
You deserved it 3 952

justash12 tells us more.

OP here following up with some details! I can not get the image of him crouching in front of the tent and taking a shit out of my head! Yes, it was a shitty situation. No, I haven't dumped him. Shoes were on! We were at a public campground, down the shore. The bathrooms have toilets, showers, sinks, and TP.

Top comments

that's a long walk for a man who has to poop!

He was just afraid of all the bears and lions which frequent the camp at night. It's a perfectly valid excuse.

Comments

that's a long walk for a man who has to poop!

yea, sounds like a shitty situation for OP, but what can you doodoo when dootie calls

#23 CONGRATULATIONS you get the crappiest overused comment on this FML award! what are you going to do now?

wait for the thumbs down parade to begin?

He was just afraid of all the bears and lions which frequent the camp at night. It's a perfectly valid excuse.

CallMeMcFeelii 13

There's no lions at Wild Wood, but there are some people off that cast of Jersey Shore, and they're 10 times more frightening than a bear.

Oh my! you forgot to mention the tigers. (:

Tigers, lions, and bears (oh my) would be too cliche. I chose Winnie and Alex because they are pretty much harmless. Tigger is a vicious man-eater. I mean, have you seen the way he bounces? He can pounce on you without a hint of warning!

And spill your hunny pot! ): Ummmm let's not forget the vicious Liger!

Fireashes250 16

Make him use poison ivy for toilet paper next time.

Got to disagree. If she was barefoot it is much easier to wash off. Way more disgusting but still, easier to clean.

I'm sure you'll find a way to get him back. Piss in his sleeping bag? By the way, puns incoming.

perdix 29

. . . *Lowers sunglasses* . . .

DrownedMyFish 18
perdix 29

#37, no, it's, "YEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAHHHH!"

Congrats on finding the only acceptable way to use that comment. That was really funny. *Tips hat*

He ate something that didn't agree with him? Wow, sorry to hear that OP.

He needed to poop. Have you honestly never had a sudden urge? It doesn't always mean dodgy food.

I know, but he barely made it out the tent. Unless he went feral for a moment I'm hoping it was food poisoning.

Seriously, surely I'm not the only one who has honestly had such an urge it's a fecking race against time to get to the loo? Sorry, for being so disgusting but when you gotta go you GOT TO GO! Plus if he'd been sleeping and the urge came on he probably had even less time to go...

That is gross! Use his socks or something to wipe your foot/shoe and tell him the same thing.