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By singleagain - 15/05/2012 01:09 - United States

Today, my boyfriend asked me to marry him, saying that the only thing he would change about me is my last name. I later told him that I wanted to keep my last name after the marriage. I'm now single again. FML
I agree, your life sucks 24 036
You deserved it 42 504
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Top comments

Bob_Cat_fml 14

This is very precisely sexist. The symbolic of giving your last name to your wife has been at first the token that she was changing family. She used to belong to her parents and then to her husband. It was treating women as objects. Last name, as well as surname, is a part of your identity, and she perfectly has the right to want to keep her identity. This absolutely doesn't mean that she doesn't truly love her boyfriend, because you know, love is not about possession and she is supposed to love him, not his name. Of course it is not the kind of sexism that will make him batter his wife, but it is still a beginning of sexism. Anyway he is a prick for leaving her, let alone the sexist thing.

zingline89 18

Well, I guess you'll be Ms. Shitstain for the rest of your life. Would it have been so bad to be Mrs. Jones?

190 65

Comments

cryandcurse 0

i used to want to keep my last name too, but them i met my fiance and realized that he'a worth the change.

113 32
MigraineurOfLife 15

Apparently, you taking his last name is required for him to be a man. The boy, that he is, can't handle it.

79 39
ICastillo 24

Damn well that's all he wanted to change and you said no. I guess he took it as a slap to the face. That sucks, maybe you guys will work it out.

60 15
greenwich1945 13

You're probably better off without him if he's going to throw a fit over something like that. But you have to see it from his point of view. His reaction was a little over the top but he probably felt very hurt and confused as to why you did not want to change your name. But you shouldn't let that sway you. You have every right to keep your maiden name if you want to.

38 30
thatgirlinoregon 21

So far, I think this is the most reasonable viewpoint presented in the comments. I happen to like my last name and, as an only (female) child, I like the idea of at least maintaining the name for myself (there are no other males on my paternal side that survived to carry the name). The idea that someone I love would disregard my wishes so easily would alienate me; while the OP's ex-fiancé might be confused as to why she'd reject his name, he could at least consider her reasons and respect them (or at least have a healthy dialogue about it). I don't believe she deserved it.

27 8
jojimugo 20

Maybe you should have offered to hyphenate his last name.

20 26
emeraldisle 30

Hyphenated last names always bothered me.

11 13
Feklfekl2222 32

Maybe she wants to carry on her own last name?

28 14
badmike89 6

I know there was more to this story, you know the part where he told you how important it is to him that you take his last name. Only saying that because I have been in the same boat. Sorry op but assuming you had that talk you deserve to be single if you didn't love him enough to want to carry on his name. Down vote away people

51 72
daltonromanowski 11

And what about her boyfriend? Did he just not love her enough to stay with her regardless of her own choice about her own name? You're pretty much saying she deserves to be treated like an object, or that she deserves to be stuck with a guy who's petty enough to break up with her because she made a choice for herself. So which is it, buddy?

39 16
deequu 20

Some people don't have that talk. I wouldn't want my boyfriends last name and yes, he is worth the change. It just doesn't roll the way it should be. That's why some people think long and hard about naming their kids, cause if they didn't, saying their name would sound like shit. And this woman is free of her own choice.

20 5
06dopey 8

its a tradition to take his last name. shoulda went with it. however he totally over reacted.

31 64
InfiniteSecret 20

Not all Traditions are good.

0 0
wbaca8 0

You should find someone A little more original anyway.... Ive read that on ifunny for crying out loud

12 7
vgc_fml 2

Seriously, why so many YDI? People are seriously saying that you don't love him because you want to keep your name? It sounds like the opposite to me. You're better off without him. Hope you find a guy who gets that you're not property.

58 19
Sir_drink_alot 20

Comment moderated for rule-breaking.

Show it anyway
15 56
sirsquab 12

That's something you bring up if he relationship is about to get serious then. I'm more concerned with my kids name tbh

10 1
deviable 9

42 - So you'd dump a woman you loved enough to marry just because she wanted to keep her maiden name? How ******* shallow.

41 11
G0v3nat0r 7

Seriously, why are there so many women saying he thinks she is an object? He clearly overreacted, there may be more to it but that seems the main reason to me.

18 12
Senseless_487 29

42, breaking up over whether or not she would take your last name is downright petty. If something like that would stop you from marrying, then what would happen when something really big happened? Would you leave her because you couldn't agree on your kids' names? There are more important things to argue over.

20 7