Love: Today, my boyfriend met my dad for the first time. The first...

By nacho - 24/01/2012 06:42 - United States

Today, my boyfriend met my dad for the first time. The first thing he said to him was, "You're an idiot for dating my daughter." FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 087

You deserved it 4 338

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Same thing different taste

By pdub523 - 27/01/2013 05:57 - United States - Longview

Today, I met my girlfriend's dad for the first time. His shirt said "D.A.D.D, Dads Against Daughters Dating, shoot the first one and word will spread". FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 193

You deserved it 3 814

By Anonymous - 12/04/2013 09:24 - Australia

Today, I finally invited my girlfriend over to meet my oddball parents. The first words out of my dad's mouth were, "So, you're the silly girl who agreed to date my dickhead son." It went downhill from there. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 762

You deserved it 6 945

By anon - 16/03/2015 04:10 - Canada - Mississauga

Today, I met my boyfriend's parents for the first time. I thought everything went well, until I got a text from him later saying, "Come on mom, she isn't THAT bad." FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 759

You deserved it 2 592

By Anonymous - 04/01/2014 23:13 - Canada - Hamilton

Today, my boyfriend met my parents. Within minutes, my dad managed to verbally sever his balls and reduce him to tears, "just for fun" apparently. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 700

You deserved it 5 699

By leahrb - 24/02/2016 18:55 - United States - Wilmington

Today, my boyfriend came over for the first time to meet my parents. The first words out of my dad's mouth were, "Son, I want you to suck upon my nipples of knowledge." FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 347

You deserved it 1 890

By quit fucking up my life - 23/11/2013 01:08 - United States - Kenai

Today, my dad met my boyfriend for the first time. He soon "casually" took a huge knife from the kitchen drawer and told my boyfriend that he's always wondered what it'd be like to stab someone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 658

You deserved it 4 924

By Anonymous - 29/01/2015 05:39 - United States - Mahwah

Today, I met my boyfriend's parents for the first time. Turns out his dad is the asshole customer that I complain about all the time. He recognized me too and spent the entire dinner making passive-aggressive remarks about how bad of an employee I am. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 378

You deserved it 2 930

By explanations - 14/06/2013 06:48 - United States - Des Plaines

Today, after dating for almost a year, I decided to introduce my parents to the man I was sure I'd fallen in love with. When dad saw him, his and my boyfriend's face completely dropped. I asked them what was wrong because I could feel the discomfort. Turns out, I'm dating my dad's drug dealer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 80 645

You deserved it 7 941

Great, just great

By Norwegian - 02/06/2012 16:55 - Norway

Today, I introduced my girlfriend to my dad. I thought it was a good idea at the time, at least until he took her aside for a private chat. During the chat, he told her all about my two previous marriages and advised her to "get out while you can". FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 065

You deserved it 7 478

Dad jokes, part #23556

By ashamed - 28/10/2019 02:00

Today, I finally let my parents meet a boyfriend of mine for the first time ever. My dad mentioned how he was happy to finally meet him, because for the past 4 years he'd thought I was gay. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 584

You deserved it 196

emvictoria 9

Tuesday 24 January 2012 11:33

My dad pretty much said the same thing.. But said get out while you can.. I'm sure your dad was just mucking around.. My boyfriend freaked out when my dad said it.. But 3 years later and we are still together :)

boofgall 16

Tuesday 24 January 2012 11:33

Damn Alan, I'd love to meet you. Sadly, I'm in Canada. :(

Comments

scuttlebuttz 1

Tuesday 24 January 2012 18:33

Your dad is an idiot for dating your boyfriend's daughter?

lolyeahthatsme 11

Tuesday 24 January 2012 19:18

Maybe, but your dad is the idiot who knocked up your mom.

hellbilly205 17

Tuesday 24 January 2012 19:32

If i didnt have work and i had enough money i would love to meet ya'll but im in conneticut unfourtunetly.

bignate898 0

Tuesday 24 January 2012 20:28

Sorry! Might need to leave

KiddNYC1O 20

Tuesday 24 January 2012 20:45

Abort mission!

missalice0306 19

Tuesday 24 January 2012 20:56

Today I finally met my girlfriend's dad. The first thing he said to me was, "You're an idiot for dating my daughter." FML

princessdolly 0

Tuesday 24 January 2012 21:56

That sucks bro

BrysGirl27 14

Tuesday 24 January 2012 23:26

Hahah prolly something my dad would do. Don't worry he was prolly just joking:)

tbone666 0

Tuesday 24 January 2012 23:53

Isn't the whole point of fml that it's anonymous

khaya 9

Wednesday 25 January 2012 0:37

You should have said "well then you are an even bigger idiot for having me" and then bask in the awkwardness.

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The Top

Today, we were running late because my hair got tangled in the curtains. My mother-in-law got so angry, she hacked at it, leaving me with a bald patch, then went and sat in the car as though we were still going anywhere with her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 095

You deserved it 200

Today, I put my sexiest lingerie on, lit candles, put some sensual music on, and got my bed ready to surprise my boyfriend when he came home. I positioned myself in the sexiest pose possible. He came home and didn't come in my room for twenty minutes because of a football game. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 148

You deserved it 6 979

The Top

Today, my girlfriend missed our date, so I angrily texted her, telling her if she can't make our dates then we should break up, and generally telling her off. Five minutes later I get a picture of her sleeping in a hospital bed from her mother, saying, "Shut the fuck up, she had appendicitis." FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 457

You deserved it 96 713

Today, my cat sneezed directly into my open eyeball. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 596

You deserved it 5 396

Today, my boyfriend and I were sexting, and he asked me if I would be naked and waiting for him when he got home. When he told me he was on his way, I took my clothes off and got into bed. What he didn’t tell me was he was bringing friends to pick up a desk from our place for their office. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 085

You deserved it 373

Today, I went for a job interview for a building position at a retail store. They saw on my application that I was good at math. They asked me what the circumference of a circle is. Being nervous during the interview, I accidentally said the area of a circle. I didn't get the job. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 348

You deserved it 7 366

Today, it was was my first day back at work as an esthetician. My first client refused to remove her face mask so I could perform the service. She demanded I just do her forehead, and that she’d only pay a third of the price since she’s only getting that part done. I refused and was written up by management. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 646

You deserved it 281

Today, at work, my mouse cursor kept randomly moving all over the screen, and messed up an entire day's attempted work. As I was leaving, I overheard one of my co-workers saying he'd plugged a wireless mouse adapter into my computer, and had been trolling me all day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 622

You deserved it 4 553

Same thing different taste

Great, just great

Dad jokes, part #23556

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