Animals: Today, my brother flicked a huge bug onto my foot, making me...

By Anonymous - 06/11/2010 11:45 - Australia

Today, my brother flicked a huge bug onto my foot, making me freak out and fall into my outdoors pool. The water was so cold that I started hyperventilating. My brother left to "get help". I finally managed to get out, and found him watching TV. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 324

You deserved it 5 601

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 19/12/2012 17:19 - Australia - Perth

Today, my friend and I decided to go skinny-dipping in her pool just after we'd finished watching a scary movie. While we were in the pool, I heard something move in the bushes so I freaked out and ran onto the deck, slipping and falling flat on my back. Her dad saw the whole thing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 434

You deserved it 37 127

By Sonotsuave - 17/05/2019 01:00 - United States - Arlington

Today, I rushed home after my mom called saying our upstairs had flooded. Apparently, my little brother somehow broke the toilet while unsupervised and water overflowed everywhere. It even reached my closet, shoes, and books, and everything touching my floor in my room is now wet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 816

You deserved it 139

By Anonymous - 23/02/2013 06:28 - United States - Calhan

Today, my brother accidentally hit me in the throat. After I stopped coughing, choking, and feeling like I was going to die, he came back into my room, quietly said "I know your weakness," and left. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 570

You deserved it 3 451

Panic! In the Bathroom

By MAWZ - 19/07/2011 06:33 - United States

Today, while I was showering, my brother thought it would be funny to burst through the door pretending he was a burglar. Panicked, I went to grab the soap bar as a weapon, slipped, fell, and hit my head on the faucet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 746

You deserved it 5 160

Release the tapes!

By Anonymous - 01/07/2021 00:01

Today, for the second time in my life, I fell and got stuck between my wall and my bed wrapped in a blanket, mad. Instead of helping me, my brother just took videos. FML

I agree, your life sucks 693

You deserved it 336

By ilikeirishducks - 19/06/2009 13:51 - Italy

Today, I had a bath in the bathroom we are currently renovating. There's a big hole in the middle of the floor. When I got out of the bath, I swung one leg across the gap to get a towel from the rack. I drew back my leg and looked down to see my brother's hot friend staring up at me in horror. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 801

You deserved it 21 100

By thisisbad - 12/10/2009 14:21 - Malaysia

Today, I was in the toilet when somebody started banging on the door loudly. I panicked and immediately cleaned my self and opened the door. As I opened the door, my brother vomited all over me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 996

You deserved it 2 788

By blackchin III - 20/06/2014 21:00 - United Kingdom - Edinburgh

Today, a fly landed on my face. Before I could even react, my brother "helpfully" punched it hard enough to both kill the fly and knock me out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 682

You deserved it 4 678

By Anonymous - 18/11/2012 00:41 - United States - Grand Junction

Today, I had to take my little brother to the pool. He acted like a brat the whole time, and when I told him we were leaving, he ran away, slipped, and hit his face on the tile floor. He told my dad and step-mom I punched him. They believed him, and I'm grounded for two months. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 558

You deserved it 2 022

Help!

By Anonymous - 07/05/2012 05:25 - United States - North Bergen

Today, I went to a river near my house. They have several swing ropes that you grab and then jump into the river. As I was about to let go of the rope, my leg got tangled and I was held underwater. My mom watched and laughed for a while before she came to help me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 644

You deserved it 3 058

perdix 29

Saturday 6 November 2010 19:01

He was looking for the infomercial on how to save drowning people, but got distracted by the Shake Weight one.

illmatic2 16

Saturday 6 November 2010 19:11

Wow, that's a really COLD thing to do. But don't let it bug you to much.

Comments

wetherguy 0

Sunday 7 November 2010 3:31

let's retelk the story without fluff: I got scared of a bug and fell into a pool. FML Really? YDI

dragonaair 5

Sunday 7 November 2010 3:33

Actually, in NSW at the moment, the weather is surprisingly quite cold. Like, 15 degrees cold. I should know since I live in NSW

T1A2Z3 34

Tuesday 24 April 2018 3:27

15 degrees... cold? Are you american? If these are degrees celcius please never come to Ireland... Some years 15 degrees is our summer. That's hot...

toddo16 5

Sunday 7 November 2010 3:35

how big is this pool that you need help out?

C94Slim 7

Sunday 7 November 2010 4:09

u my friend, are the best

NickoMazingxx 0

Sunday 7 November 2010 4:13

Nice brother you have.

Saiyza 4

Sunday 7 November 2010 4:34

Don't you mean HYPOventilating? Hahahahahahaha!.......I'm sorry.

tommygun93 2

Sunday 7 November 2010 5:03

lol it IS hyperventilating =P

perlie559 0

Sunday 7 November 2010 4:34

Now that's brotherly love!!! LMAO

sassy_bunny16 0

Sunday 7 November 2010 5:51

can you say helpless?

bindingfame 0

Sunday 7 November 2010 6:43

Uhm ok wat does this have to do with the price of tea in china

megan251 0

Sunday 7 November 2010 6:54

your brother is a dick lol sorry to here that

WarByrd 0

Sunday 7 November 2010 14:53

hear*

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USA, USA, USA; well, almost. Today we're not welcoming a French artist, not even an American artist, but an artist from... oh, you'll see! Are you in a hurry or something? Why can't we just sit down, have a nice cup of tea and talk about the future? ...

I agree, your life sucks 10

You deserved it 15

Today, I walked into the living room to find my 11-year-old daughter about to kiss her "not my boyfriend" on the lips. When I asked what she thought she was doing, she peeled a piece of scotch tape off her lips and said, "It's okay! We're using protection." FML

I agree, your life sucks 74 189

You deserved it 11 246

The Top

Today, my six-year-old son told me my makeup looks like his grandmother's did in the casket. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 159

You deserved it 894

Today, my boyfriend admitted the reason he was dating me was because he has a fetish for grandmothers and apparently I look, smell, and act like one. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 349

You deserved it 5 097

Today, I was on a date with a girl I've been crushing on for a while. At one point we started talking about pets we'd had. I wanted to show my sensitive side, so I told her how I sadly had to get my beloved cat euthanized earlier that week, and had buried her in my backyard. Her response? "Ew." FML

I agree, your life sucks 396

You deserved it 126

Today, to try to have a less depressing Christmas, I've put up a small tree in my apartment and wrapped some presents for myself. I woke from a nap to the sound of my cat vomiting. What did she throw up on? The presents. FML

I agree, your life sucks 878

You deserved it 194

Today, I had a stomach bug, but despite it I swallowed a mouthful of habanero sauce on a dare. I ended up projectile vomiting on a wall outside, lost my sense of balance and fell over on the sidewalk, almost blacked out from the tightness in my chest, and had to refuse an ambulance that somebody had called. All for $5. FML

I agree, your life sucks 132

You deserved it 1 276

Today, I spent nearly half an hour clearing several inches of snow off my car. After almost suffering from hypothermia, I finished. Except the car keys were missing from my pocket, presumably buried under a foot of snow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 925

You deserved it 6 894

Same thing different taste

Panic! In the Bathroom

Release the tapes!

Help!

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