Holidays: Today, my dad and brother found a Christmas present that they'd...

By Cinderstar95 - 28/12/2016 09:34 - United States - Schererville

Today, my dad and brother found a Christmas present that they'd "forgotten" to give me. Expecting a joke, I apprehensively opened it. But I still wasn't prepared to unwrap the neck of the Christmas turkey. It had been rotting in the living room for 2 days. The smell was indescribable. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 346

You deserved it 437

Thanksgiving: Turkeys and Skids
Family meals that turn absurd, because Thanksgiving is also about laughing at little disasters. More…

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 13/12/2010 02:36 - United States

Today, I woke up to an early Christmas present on my car. It was a nicely wrapped box containing a dead bird, a half eaten sandwich, and a note reading "MERRY F**KING CHRISTMAS STAN." This will probably be my only Christmas present. My name is Luke. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 057

You deserved it 2 448

By ~JESSICA~ - 11/09/2010 06:19 - United States

Today, I woke up late to an urgent voicemail from my dad telling me he left me a present in my car. Excited, I went to investigate. I then saw that his "surprise" was fresh fish he had caught. I hate fish, and now my car stinks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 898

You deserved it 3 607

By Anonymous - 13/11/2012 23:17 - United States - Killington

Today, I found a wounded turkey in our backyard. I brought it inside, put it in a cage, and tended to its wounds. I then left. When I got back home, I smelled the wonderful aroma of my mother's cooking. She had prepared a turkey, the one I'd rescued. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 897

You deserved it 5 658

By lebato97 - 09/12/2011 03:35 - United States

Today, I saw my neighbor's Christmas tree they had put up on their porch, with decorative presents under it. Being that my neighbors hate me, I figured I would take a present to piss them off. While walking back home with the present, I opened it. Inside it read "I knew you would, douche bag." FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 660

You deserved it 80 894

By anonymous - 21/12/2009 19:23 - United States

Today, my boyfriend decided to give me my Christmas present early because he's going to his grandparents' house for Christmas and won't see me. I was excited, until I unwrapped a sweater that I left there a month ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 229

You deserved it 2 992

By Julie - 25/12/2012 03:20 - United States - East Brunswick

Today, I woke up to find our Christmas tree knocked over, unwrapped presents scattered everywhere, and my mom passed out on the sofa with a bottle of booze. Merry Christmas. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 209

You deserved it 2 791

By sick of this shit - 12/03/2016 13:33 - United States - West Grove

Today, my dad opened my fridge, let rip a horrible fart into it, then closed it and said "There ya go, a little somethin' for supper." FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 950

You deserved it 1 753

By Christmasloverandstuff - 25/12/2012 17:45 - United States

Today, my extended family came over for Christmas. I forgot to get a present for my extremely sensitive aunt. I took a gift from my re-gift pile and wrapped it quickly. Little did I remember that it was the same gift she gave me last year. She noticed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 903

You deserved it 42 524

By John Nani - 25/12/2011 17:06 - United States

Today, it's Christmas Day. Normally, my family would be opening gifts right now. Instead, my mom is holding our gifts hostage until we clean the house. Apparently, "The presents aren't going anywhere." FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 325

You deserved it 29 393

By Anon - 26/12/2015 02:03 - United States

Today, I thought my mom and I could put aside our differences and open our Christmas presents. When she opened mine, she turned to my dad and said she didn't want the present, so I could give it to someone else. 'Tis the season. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 552

You deserved it 1 394

spoon69x 5

Wednesday 4 January 2017 6:35

The obvious solution would be to return the gift next year (although you may want to freeze it in the meantime or there won't be much left to give them.....)

Akitakat 31

Monday 25 December 2017 0:05

Their dad & brother... didn’t you read the fml? :)

Comments

Laphog 17

Tuesday 3 January 2017 7:04

Perhaps ....a diaper filled with Indian food? Bigfoot's **** would probably come close as well.

coolmike699 26

Tuesday 3 January 2017 7:05

Who leaves rotting meat in the living room for 2 days?

Akitakat 31

Monday 25 December 2017 0:05

Their dad & brother... didn’t you read the fml? :)

mermaidkeels 26

Tuesday 3 January 2017 7:12

If they waited for you to open the "gift", they were near by and had to endure the smell as well. They pretty much pranked themselves in the process.

Tripartita 44

Tuesday 3 January 2017 7:15

1. Brace yourself 2. Hold the rotten mess closer to your face 3. Blow as hard as you can in the direction of those bastards

LyricaSilvan 29

Tuesday 3 January 2017 8:47

Your family has some weird ideas of what constitutes an acceptable prank. Giving someone rotting meat as a "gift" is unsanitary and bizarre.

awildwhisper 30

Tuesday 3 January 2017 9:36

I hope you returned the favor and had saved them Christmas leftovers to give for New Years.

WeirdUS 29

Wednesday 4 January 2017 6:20

Regift it by hiding it in their room or in the closet or even the car especially under the seat it'll be a pain in the ass to reach and the car is going to reek for days.

spoon69x 5

Wednesday 4 January 2017 6:35

The obvious solution would be to return the gift next year (although you may want to freeze it in the meantime or there won't be much left to give them.....)