Health: Today, my dad got drunk and asked if I had inherited his "abnormally...

By nick - 06/03/2011 01:42 - United States

Today, my dad got drunk and asked if I had inherited his "abnormally tiny penis." FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 445

You deserved it 3 817

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Same thing different taste

By idontevencareanymore - 23/05/2014 21:25 - United States - Jarrell

Today, my mom came home drunk and crying, so I tried to comfort her and asked what was wrong. She wasted no time admitting that she'd hooked up with her ex-husband, AKA my dad, but that it'd sucked for her because he has a tiny penis. Thanks, I really needed to know that. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 207

You deserved it 4 705

By Anonymous - 23/05/2015 07:03 - United States - Tampa

Today, my dad came to my 8-year-old daughter's birthday party wearing a shirt that said "Small penis, huge dick." FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 130

You deserved it 2 529

By Illinoisgirl - 14/02/2012 14:29 - Hungary

Today, my dad got so drunk that he proposed to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 242

You deserved it 3 050

By paige - 01/04/2011 03:18 - United States

Today, my dad came home drunk and called me hot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 728

You deserved it 5 789

He's still got it

By Anonymous - 26/10/2019 00:01

Today, my dad got drunk at a party and flashed me and my friends. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 706

You deserved it 151

News to me

By Anonymous - 18/04/2020 20:00

Today, my dad told me he liked men. While he was making a drunken speech. At my wedding. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 934

You deserved it 184

By HeIsKindaRightTho - 16/09/2014 04:31 - United States - Houghton

Today, I video-chatted with my mom and showed her my new, very short haircut. My dad walked in, took one look at me and said, "I can only attribute this to penis envy," and walked out again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 336

You deserved it 4 936

By yeah why not - 06/04/2013 17:06 - Norway

Today, my dad had a little too much to drink. When he's that drunk, he likes to pepper me with a lot of random questions. He asked if I've ever tried hard drugs, and if I want to die. I answered no to both of the questions, and he demanded to know why not. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 854

You deserved it 3 004

By FML - 04/09/2015 16:27 - United States - Maricopa

Today, I took my boyfriend to a family dinner. It went well, until my dad got drunk and started telling everyone about how "midgets" are assholes and are ruining America. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 700

You deserved it 1 729

By Anonymous - 26/06/2015 17:42 - Zambia

Today, my dad drunkenly confessed that the reason he never gave me the sex talk was because he figured that I'm too weird-looking and socially awkward to ever get laid. He's right, all too right. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 201

You deserved it 2 393

ImKindaABigDeal 6

Sunday 6 March 2011 9:06

shoulda said "no I got moms abnormally large one"

cheerchika 0

Sunday 6 March 2011 9:04

hahaha. say " no and thank god" ;)

Comments

brittanyshaay 0

Monday 7 March 2011 23:45

well? did you???

RainWind 0

Tuesday 8 March 2011 1:27

I'm assuming that since this is an FML the answer is yes...

dansco 24

Tuesday 8 March 2011 3:19

#128 is correct! Otherwise you would laugh at your Dad for having a small **** ;) At least you know who to blame for the future of "is it in yet" or "where is it" jokes... Its like a **** but SMALLER lmao

kalbrek009 20

Tuesday 8 March 2011 4:23

if he does it again, tell him "sadly enough, yes...if 14" is abnormally small" then walk away....lol!

alex182011 0

Thursday 10 March 2011 4:18

thats depressing XD

bamam 0

Thursday 10 March 2011 22:54

Lol did u?

MitchellK 3

Saturday 12 March 2011 1:00

so the FML is that he answered yes?

bitheway 2

Sunday 13 March 2011 2:55

The only thing that could make this worse (other than the obvious) is if you were a chick

bitheway 2

Sunday 13 March 2011 5:15

Actually #90 micro-penis isn't inheritable and he's only abnormally small if he doesn't even reach 1" micro-penis is when it passes 1" but doesn't surpass 2"