Miscellaneous: Today, my dad taught me how to swim. I had to keep doing a lot...

By Anonymous - 26/08/2011 04:55 - United States

Today, my dad taught me how to swim. I had to keep doing a lot of strange movements to keep my body floating. While doing that, two 8-year-old girls came and asked me if i needed help getting out of the water. I'm a 20 year old guy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 656

You deserved it 8 646

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Same thing different taste

By Cantswim - 20/05/2009 15:45 - United States

Today, I had to go take swimming lessons because my mom has a fear I'll drown and I'm totally afraid of swimming anyway and never get anywhere near water. My instructor? A high school classmate of mine. My fellow swimming classmates? 5 and 6 year old kids. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 573

You deserved it 9 976

By anonymous - 10/06/2009 22:50 - United States

Today, I decided to go swimming. I knew my technique would be off because I haven't swam since high school. It was when I made it only halfway across the pool that the lifeguard decided to jump in and save me. I wasn't drowning or struggling. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 731

You deserved it 4 676

Baywatch music starts

By Anonymous - 01/05/2019 12:00

Today, I nearly drowned. I was at a wave pool for the first time and stupidly swam out to the deep end. When the waves turned on, I discovered I can't swim in rough water. Despite my yelling, "Help!" and flailing around, the lifeguard paid me no attention. My friend had to save me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 069

You deserved it 622

By Anonymous - 02/06/2019 12:03

Today, I told my mom I was going swimming with friends. She told me, in front of them, not to go into the deep end unless there was an adult around because I'm not old enough to swim on my own. I'm 19. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 983

You deserved it 204

In my day…

By thanks dad - 01/08/2020 02:02

Today, we were slowly introducing my daughter to the pool to help her get over her terrible fear of water. My father-in-law scoffed, called us pussies, and tossed my daughter straight into the water. When I threw him out, he insisted he was just trying to teach her to swim "the right way." FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 229

You deserved it 285

Baywatch

By Anonymous - 02/10/2017 19:30 - United States - Stony Brook

Today, I went to the university pool. There was this cute lifeguard there, and every time I got out of the water I saw her looking at me, so I walked up to her and asked if everything was OK. She told me she thought I was going to drown. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 350

You deserved it 512

Little perv

By cplaner - 04/02/2009 12:56 - United States

Today, I was teaching swim lessons. I got felt up by a 6 year-old boy. Three times. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 755

You deserved it 5 238

By AwkwardPotato - 02/07/2013 02:37 - United States - Bakersfield

Today, my mom signed me up for a swimming class to show my sister there's nothing to be afraid of. Considering I'm 17, I assumed I'd be in an advanced class. Instead, I get to spend summer blowing bubbles in the shallow end with four-year-olds as my little sister cheers me on from the steps. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 934

You deserved it 3 758

By Anonymous - 11/06/2011 00:14 - United States

Today, I was swimming at the water park, when out of nowhere a lifeguard bombed into the pool, grabbed me, and hauled me to the surface, running his hands over my chest in the process. Apparently, the way I swim makes it look like I'm in my drowning death throes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 446

You deserved it 7 721

Bad moon rising

By Anonymous - 28/03/2024 14:00 - United States - Salem

Today, I was working my lifeguard job when I had to remind a 17 year-old boy that water is clear and that I could see him pulling his trunks down to moon his friends. Kind of want to drown myself now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 475

You deserved it 93

Catcherchick94 0

Friday 26 August 2011 12:04

Get yourself some arm floaties! Or next time don't try to practice swimming in a public pool.

marinus_fml 19

Friday 26 August 2011 12:17

Totally reminds me of Dr.Sheldon Cooper who taught himself to swim with the Internet and practiced on the floor in his apartment.

Comments

herop 0

Friday 26 August 2011 12:52

Poor you! Dont feel so bad you can still swim in your tub

leadman1989 15

Friday 26 August 2011 15:00

Yeah totally, so **** them right?

krysxkatastrophe 14

Friday 26 August 2011 13:13

It's ok, OP. I also never learned to swim. I'm a very poor swimmer and don't like being where I can't touch the ground.

texas_redneck88 10

Friday 26 August 2011 14:37

Stay in the kiddie pool then

Lawbynature 0

Friday 26 August 2011 13:26

What is daddy doing teaching you how to swim at age 20??????

TorontoChik 0

Friday 26 August 2011 13:48

The fact is he taught him right?!

TorontoChik 0

Friday 26 August 2011 13:49

The fact is he taught him right?!

texas_redneck88 10

Friday 26 August 2011 14:30

20, a damn grown ass man, and don't even know how to swim. Some people's kids...........smh

dc4 12

Friday 26 August 2011 14:45

Replied to the wrong comment :/

chef19 1

Friday 26 August 2011 14:38

20 with two 8 yr olds? So you were 12 when you had them?

HU4L188 0

Friday 26 August 2011 14:43

I dont think they were his kids 34 LOL

leadman1989 15

Friday 26 August 2011 15:02

Comprehenshun (yes spelt wrong ironically) FAIL!

BelleBelle_fml 11

Friday 26 August 2011 15:22

Re-read the FML...

THE_A_TEEN 27

Friday 26 August 2011 16:23

#34 "While doing that, two 8-year-old girls came and asked me if i needed help getting out of the water" Judging from this part of the fml, with it's slick wheels and custom paint job, I say 2 girls came up to him, or in this case randomly poped out of nowhere In this fml, ergo not his

HU4L188 0

Friday 26 August 2011 14:42

I mean this in the nicest way possible but how can you NOT know how to swim. Its like human instinct

dc4 12

Friday 26 August 2011 14:47

Not really. Thats why people take swimming lessons

HomeAl0ne 20

Tuesday 30 August 2011 2:58

So all those drownings are actually suicides! Case solved.

ltsune 3

Friday 26 August 2011 14:43

How can you possibly not know how to swim? I feel very bad for you, OP

swasticop 0

Friday 26 August 2011 14:45

Its okay OP. some people just don't spend much time around the water like others. People are going to be dicks about the fact that you're 20 and can barely swim. Im not that great of a swimmer, and I'm close to 20. I just learned to tread water like 3 months ago. Try not to let it bother you.