Intimacy: Today, my dad texted me, saying "My dicks so hard 4 u". I'm desperately...

By Anonymous - 01/07/2015 18:56

Today, my dad texted me, saying "My dicks so hard 4 u". I'm desperately hoping he meant to send that to his girlfriend instead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 884

You deserved it 2 490

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Same thing different taste

By ruffrider - 05/02/2009 14:09 - United States

Today, I decided to send my boyfriend a pic text of me naked. I accidentally sent it to my dad and got a text back saying, "You definitely take after your mom." FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 711

You deserved it 65 431

By sober - 12/02/2009 02:09 - United States

Today, I got a text message. It said, "I'm so drunk. What you up to, girl?" It was my dad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 79 392

You deserved it 4 328

Nice view

By Sexting Parents - 16/11/2012 02:45 - United States - Short Hills

Today, my dad asked me to send my mom a text since he was driving and I was in the passenger seat. I pulled up my mom's contact on his phone, and I found that my mom had recently sent my dad a picture of her jugs, along with the message, "We miss you." FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 862

You deserved it 2 751

Never trust the messenger

By Teamarie - 11/08/2009 15:21 - United States

Today, as I was driving my dad home, I got a text message. My dad, who doesn't want me texting while I'm driving, decided to read the text message to me. He began to repeat a message from my boyfriend recounting the amazing sex we had the night before. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 146

You deserved it 20 999

By Ren - 30/01/2009 15:50 - United States

Today, I received a text message from my older brother. It said, "Ah... I want you". I hope to god it was intended for someone else. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 474

You deserved it 2 195

By Anonymous - 02/09/2012 23:47 - United States

Today, after a visit with my mom, I started feeling sick. I meant to send her a text asking if she had gotten sick lately, but I accidentally sent a text asking if she had gotten dick lately. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 513

You deserved it 5 384

By AnnoyedByFriends - 08/08/2013 04:43

Today, my friends thought it would be fun to change my dad's name on my phone to my girlfriend's name. Guess who got an erotic text message when standing next to me while in the line to buy groceries. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 738

You deserved it 9 703

By Anonymous - 21/03/2015 08:55 - United Kingdom - Aberdeen

Today, I overheard my dickhead dad telling my girlfriend she's too good for me, then asking if she wants to settle for someone like me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 955

You deserved it 2 660

By Kaji - 14/11/2008 11:20 - France

Today, I sent a text message to my girlfriend telling her how much I wanted to make love to her tonight. I've just realized I sent it to her brother. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 542

You deserved it 24 118

By tinypenis - 04/06/2013 12:15 - United States - Jamaica

Today, while sexting my girlfriend, I accidently sent a picture to her father instead of her. He sent back a link to a penis enlargement company's website. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 821

You deserved it 71 869

colvindj 22

Thursday 2 July 2015 0:16

look at it this way, at least it wasn't a pic.

MattStro 23

Thursday 2 July 2015 0:17

Have fun trying to look him in the eyes again after this.

Comments

jqmalang 17

Thursday 2 July 2015 1:21

Yeah that's very awkward...

CaptainFluffyPaw 19

Thursday 2 July 2015 1:23

At least there wasn't a picture.

saffy66 34

Thursday 2 July 2015 1:34

Text back and say, thanks but no thanks, Dad. Then post it to one of those autocorrect fail sites. Might as well get a laugh out of it!

rockninja 21

Thursday 2 July 2015 1:34

i don't have anything to say to this!! i just hope for you OP! stay strong.

amileah13 26

Thursday 2 July 2015 1:34

Can't undo that image!

NostalgiaFreak9 41

Thursday 2 July 2015 1:35

If he meant to send it to his girlfriend, I hope I see his FML on this incident.

Jayroc 18

Thursday 2 July 2015 2:18

Dick move on his part

worldclassrager 39

Thursday 2 July 2015 2:27

What did you send back as a reply?

Big_Bear99 19

Thursday 2 July 2015 2:49

On the other hand, bribery and blackmail are wonderful things!

Bunni_Boo_Butt 7

Thursday 2 July 2015 3:00

so awkward! hope he notice it before sending to another "wrong" person...

Keywords

Friends Love Awkward Miscellaneous Cute Haircut Relatable You're fired Work Cars Parenting Kids Family Cats DIY Sex Intimacy Am I overreacting? Management Poopoo peepee Coworkers Frustration Capitalism Dogs Animals ADHD Transportation Dating Health Anxiety

The Top

Today, I demanded to know why my boyfriend takes so long in public toilets. He admitted his ex was such a nasty ho, she would drag him into public toilets whenever she wanted dick in public. So now every time he goes in one, he gets a boner and has to "get rid of it" before he can come out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 138

You deserved it 350

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex. Feeling goofy, I thought it’d be funny to try to reenact that horrible sex scene from the movie Showgirls. I threw my body back, but completely lost my balance and smashed my head on the headboard. I ended up with a bad concussion and a huge hospital bill. FML

I agree, your life sucks 839

You deserved it 2 157

The Top

Today, I decided to formally introduce my girlfriend to my parents. My dad took the opportunity to apologize for walking in on us a few days ago while we were having sex. It wasn't her. Thanks dad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 367

You deserved it 275 740

Today, my dad grounded me for two weeks for profusely swearing at my misbehaving laptop. After some arguing, he actually accepted my half-joking offer to play a game of CoD over it. His condition was that if I lost, my grounding period would double. We played. He kicked my ass. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 043

You deserved it 34 667

Today, I realized the only reason I watched the SuperBowl is because Justin Bieber tweeted about it. I don't even like football. I had no idea what was going on the whole game. All I knew was who I was cheering for, because Justin Bieber tweeted who he was cheering for. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 311

You deserved it 86 664

Today, I found out my boyfriend stacks things on me while I sleep. Apparently his record is 4 pillows, a textbook, and the cat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 441

You deserved it 59

Today, I installed a pool in my house. Unfortunately, it was in my hallway. The floors are ruined all through my house, everything smells like mildew and no one is in a hurry to fix it because of Covid lockdowns. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 196

You deserved it 613

Today, it's been a week since I realized how much work the tongue actually does during eating. It pushes food around the mouth to my teeth like a little slug. I've been so conscious of it, I haven't enjoyed eating since. FML

I agree, your life sucks 336

You deserved it 800

Same thing different taste

Nice view

Never trust the messenger

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