Animals: Today, my dog was watching me and started to have a hard-on,...

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By aXel - 13/10/2008 08:29

Today, my dog was watching me and started to have a hard-on, for half an hour. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 741

You deserved it 8 326

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Same thing different taste

By what-the-what - 29/10/2017 13:00 - United States - Mount Pleasant

Today, my mother called me at work, freaking out about my dog, so I panicked. What was wrong? He had a hard-on and she'd never seen that happen before. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 787

You deserved it 303

What are you doing?

By puppylove - 03/08/2019 16:00 - Philippines

Today, my mom caught me absentmindedly staring at my puppy's butthole. She'd also been standing there for 5 minutes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 557

You deserved it 1 985

Zoning out

By puppylove - 05/05/2020 08:00

Today, my mother found me staring at my puppy's asshole. She had apparently been standing there for 5 minutes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 446

You deserved it 1 815

By Koko - 07/04/2016 16:07 - Germany - Berlin

Today, my dog was so happy to see me that he laid down on his back and started pissing like a fountain. He pissed on everything around him, including me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 789

You deserved it 1 951

By Sam l. - 10/11/2012 06:51 - United States

Today, my dog and I were sitting on the couch. I went to the bathroom, came back, and saw him walk over the remote, which caused the TV to change to the Hustler channel, just a few moments before my girlfriend walked through the door. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 163

You deserved it 3 661

By Anonymous - 13/04/2011 02:20

Today, I watched my dog chase his tail for ten minutes, thinking "wow, dogs are easily entertained." Then I realized that I'd been watching my dog chase his tail for 10 minutes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 647

You deserved it 40 994

By Username - 02/08/2011 17:35 - United States

Today, I decided to play with my dog. I sat on the ground and whistled for him to come to me. I smiled when I saw him running at my happily. He sniffed me, turned around, lifted his leg and peed on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 481

You deserved it 5 309

By Anonymous - 27/08/2014 23:04 - United Kingdom - London

Today, I was woken up by my wife softly kissing me on the lips. Half asleep, I kissed her back, before quickly opening my eyes and realising it wasn't my wife; it was my dog. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 589

You deserved it 7 520

By FrozenAnonymus - 14/07/2016 18:05 - Czech Republic - Prague

Today, I was laying on a couch with my dog watching TV when I heard my dog fart. I looked at her, she looked at me and started waving her tail, blowing it into my direction. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 867

You deserved it 1 529

Cujo 2: Electric Boogaloo

By Kelsiiii - 11/03/2020 03:00

Today, I pretended to be dead in front of my dog to see what he would do. He started to hump me, and when I tried to get up, he growled at me until I got back down on the ground to wait until he was finished. FML

I agree, your life sucks 728

You deserved it 2 121

Tygastyle 0

Wednesday 18 February 2009 3:10

at least you didn't get the boner....right?

badmotherfucker_fml 0

Sunday 22 March 2009 3:21

watching you do what?

Comments

that_guy_you_are 0

Sunday 10 May 2009 12:34

What are you complaining about? The dog wants you.

2101 0

Wednesday 13 May 2009 4:13

lol no.3

omgarual 0

Wednesday 27 May 2009 0:24

haha, 15.

Nicolai_Tansy 0

Thursday 28 May 2009 21:38

wow. thats awkward. and nasty.

Punk_Chic 0

Tuesday 2 June 2009 8:42

wow... thats just... wow...

technobutterfly 0

Tuesday 2 June 2009 22:34

You watch your dog get a hard-on?

JordyRox 0

Monday 22 June 2009 6:41

Le ts Get It On... Aaah Yeah/ Ew Animal Rapist Lol. Jokes

NoDontKillMe 19

Tuesday 23 April 2013 1:53

Dafuq?

helpmeiamblind 0

Saturday 18 July 2009 0:08

And you had nothing better to do for 1/2 hour than watch your dog watching you? FYL cause it clearly sucks

treehuga 0

Friday 14 August 2009 20:31

hahahahahahaha #5 aqua teen hunger force ftw!

_KEDABITCH_ 0

Tuesday 18 August 2009 4:43

WTF thats sick!

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Today, I was snuggling with my boyfriend on the couch. We ended up falling asleep, and when I woke up I felt a slobberly substance running down my face. It turns out, my boyfriend drooled so much, it filled my ear and overflowed onto my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 397

You deserved it 3 954

Today, I came home early from work because I wasn’t feeling well. I overheard a phone conversation that my husband was having in the living room. “Yeah dude, I ain’t attracted to that bitch no more, she got a big back now, but she pays the bills and I got a roof over me, so it’s good, you feel me?” FML

I agree, your life sucks 615

You deserved it 99

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I agree, your life sucks 15 159

You deserved it 1 363

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I agree, your life sucks 12 869

You deserved it 68 253

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I agree, your life sucks 50 928

You deserved it 28 194

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I agree, your life sucks 1 273

You deserved it 3 897

Today, I was chewing my pen while I was paying attention to my teacher. I chewed a bit too hard, and something broke off, so I casually looked at my pen. It was unharmed. One of my front teeth had broken off. Everyone in class, including the teacher, had to see it before I could call my dentist. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 667

You deserved it 13 259

Today, I had to explain to this really intimidating girl that I wasn't giving her a dirty look, and that it was just my face at rest. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 427

You deserved it 3 018

Same thing different taste

What are you doing?

Zoning out

Cujo 2: Electric Boogaloo

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