Miscellaneous: Today, my evening was shot to hell when I found my pregnant wife... - FML

By Anonymous - 31/01/2014 22:08 - United States - Blue Earth

Today, my evening was shot to hell when I found my pregnant wife on the floor, sobbing because we'd run out of cheese sticks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 424

You deserved it 9 063

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Same thing different taste

By stupidbullcrêpe - 20/08/2012 22:06 - Brazil - Santos

Today, my pregnant wife broke down in tears over the fact that since moving to Brazil for my job, we don't have regular access to macaroni and cheese. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 140

You deserved it 6 282

Hello from the other side

By losthusband - 11/10/2020 20:01 - United States

Today, my pregnant wife and I got separated while out shopping. She ended up having meltdown and crying so hard the manager had to call me over the PA. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 173

You deserved it 205

By Anonymous - 11/12/2014 21:47 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I got to experience the horror of my wife's pregnancy. She woke me up abruptly at 5 am by throwing up all over me due to her terrible morning sickness, then ate pickles covered in mayonnaise, and later dropped to the floor sobbing when I told her we were out of dog food. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 339

You deserved it 5 290

By Scott - 15/09/2011 07:34 - United States

Today, I caught my pregnant wife trying to suck milk from her breasts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 292

You deserved it 6 419

Oooh nooooooo

By eternal - 24/06/2019 18:00

Today, while at the drive-thru at Sonic, they told me they were out of mozzarella sticks. I shed actual tears. I’m not even pregnant. FML

I agree, your life sucks 991

You deserved it 1 241

The bed is lava

By for better or for farts - 06/08/2020 23:01

Today, my very pregnant wife woke up in bed, grabbing her stomach and writhing in pain. Worried that the baby might be in distress, I asked her what was wrong. She gasped then let out what can only be described as a river of hot liquid shit all over herself and my legs. We both cried. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 408

You deserved it 207

You BASTARD!

By moosemay - 02/04/2013 15:04 - Germany

Today, suffering from severe morning sickness followed by cravings for salty food, I had stacked our fridge with yummy snacks. When finally emerging from our bathroom after retching this morning, I found out my husband had eaten all my snacks the night before. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 743

You deserved it 4 426

By Mouhahaa - 09/05/2012 03:48 - France

Today, my wife stabbed my hand with a fork, making it bleed. I'd only tried to take some fries from her plate. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 655

You deserved it 36 372

Double whammy

By Anonymous - 28/02/2023 16:00 - Argentina

Today, my wife told me she wanted a divorce and walked out. This is two days after she informed me that she is unexpectedly pregnant. FML

I agree, your life sucks 925

You deserved it 82

By lamortdeshommes - 28/06/2011 17:03 - United States

Today, I sent my boyfriend to the store to get groceries while I was at work. Instead of what I listed, he came back with hot pockets, ice cream and beer. I'm lactose intolerant and pregnant. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 946

You deserved it 8 308

Next

Top comments

mhc91 10

Saturday 1 February 2014 5:35

Then be a nice person and buy her more

Catkam623 27

Saturday 1 February 2014 5:35

For gods sake man not the cheesesticks. How could you think about your plans when such a tragedy has occurred.

Comments

brandoneyez1 25

Saturday 1 February 2014 15:26

Get used to it. Pregnancy is harder on her than you. I just had a baby, I would know.

nyx813 3

Saturday 1 February 2014 15:50

Stop bitching! It's just pregnancy hormones.

QuietSunlight22 16

Saturday 1 February 2014 15:52

Maybe you should try to be more sensitive to the fact that her body is under going many changes while she's carrying your child. Yeah it does suck, but show her some compassion and buy her some dang cheese sticks.

MexiMelt14 3

Saturday 1 February 2014 15:58

oh my gosh! poor thing

w_pony_4ever 15

Saturday 1 February 2014 16:37

Your poor wife OP! Maybe you should go buy her some...

ASBriere 8

Saturday 1 February 2014 16:41

Seriously is the funniest thing I've read in a long time. My wife was the same when we were expecting. Good luck

johannamarie 12

Saturday 1 February 2014 17:03

Then go get her more ******* cheeses sticks and stop being so dramatic.

crazycatlady1192 5

Saturday 1 February 2014 18:23

omg I cried reading this

skittyskatbrat 19

Saturday 1 February 2014 18:36

Oh, I understand! I woke up starving this morning and went to fix some peanut butter toast, the ONLY thing that sounded edible and actually sounded ******* amazing. And discovered that Hubby ate the last of the bread. Still not sure what I'll eat; roads are in rotten shape and I am not about to drive anywhere. So, yeah, trust me...I understand this one! Best solution for husband, go get the cheesesticks and pick up a beer for yourself and a bouquet for her. And remember...you have a new baby coming, and this is part of that. Smile!

grashopper8 7

Saturday 1 February 2014 18:53

Haha that's hilarious! It will be a great story to tell later. I hope you're both already laughing about it by now. Congratulations!

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Miscellaneous Relatable Embarrassing Awkward Health Love Am I overreacting? Relationship advice Work Weird AITA Dating Sleep Annoying Parents Mental health Furniture Kids Friends Gross Public freakouts Fight Neighbours Cops Drugs Medication Dogs Animals Teenagers Ironic

The Top

Today, thinking no one was home, I decided to be a little frisky with my boyfriend. I guess I was being loud and woke up my sleeping autistic brother the room over. Halfway through, he burst through the door, panicking. He thought I was having another one of my asthma attacks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 979

You deserved it 9 781

Today, my dad agreed to let me borrow the car to go rock climbing with my friends. He'd just filled it up with gas, which is how I realized halfway back home that one of my "friends" had siphoned well over half the gas straight out of the tank. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 895

You deserved it 2 259

The Top

Today, my wife and I were watching Killing Kennedy. Jokingly, I said, "Spoiler alert: he dies." She threw a book at me and won't talk to me. I think she's serious. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 422

You deserved it 7 599

Today, my anxiety was so bad that when I was riding my bike on the sidewalk and two pedestrians came walking in the opposite direction, I got so nervous about having to go between them or accidentally hitting them that I fell off my bike, into a bush. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 752

You deserved it 5 737

Today, I was so bored that I spent two hours researching the history of spoons. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 427

You deserved it 7 811

Today, I received an email asking for a Skype interview at 11 am sharp. I waited for half an hour. He never even accepted my contact request. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 874

You deserved it 940

Today, I had to drive 40-odd miles to my grown-ass son's house to kill a large spider on the wall. It had him trapped in his bedroom because his wife had already gone to work. How did I ever raise such a wuss? FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 755

You deserved it 1 659

Today, I invaded my boyfriend’s privacy by looking through his phone. I read the texts between him and his mom. I realized his mom is the worst. Then I realized I’m exactly like his mom. I told my boyfriend what I did, and called him weird for dating his mom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 181

You deserved it 2 250