Miscellaneous: Today, my friends learned that if you play "connect the dots"... - FML

By Hoggiebear - 05/10/2011 16:08 - United States

Today, my friends learned that if you play "connect the dots" with the pimples on my back the resulting picture is a large penis. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 391

You deserved it 5 369

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 23/03/2016 14:36 - United States - Arlington

Today, my acne reached a new low. Literally. I'm now getting bright red pimples on my penis. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 795

You deserved it 2 848

By BYUwildchild - 17/12/2010 16:23 - United States

Today, I realized that the fish-shaped birth mark on the back of my leg, that I have had all my life, is not really shaped like a fish as I had originally thought. It looks just like a penis. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 953

You deserved it 3 529

By GeneralElement - 19/02/2010 06:32 - United States

Today, in math, I was working on an assignment and this really cute girl comes over and says my name. At this point, my heart is pumping with excitement and I'm thinking she is going to ask for my number. She said, "Did you know someone drew a penis on your back?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 923

You deserved it 3 659

By imblue42 - 24/06/2015 05:16 - United States

Today, I walked into the dining room to find my mom popping pimples on my dad's back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 245

You deserved it 3 701

Subconscious

By doodler - 27/02/2014 11:59 - United States - Hurst

Today, I was doodling randomly during a meeting at work, and I noticed my drawing was beginning to look a bit like a penis. A coworker was eyeing it so I tried to make it something else by adding... oh good, now it's a penis and balls. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 098

You deserved it 13 507

By balletteacher - 08/09/2012 20:32 - United States

Today, I realized my acne looks like star constellations. I've already found the Little Dipper on my left cheek. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 236

You deserved it 2 585

By mafiaguy800 - 27/08/2019 14:00

Today, I woke up to see my four year-old brother with a sharpie, trying to play “Connect the Dots” with my acne. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 508

You deserved it 152

Clean up

By Anonymous - 19/01/2024 03:00 - United States - Cary

Today, I realized that my lack of body hygiene reached a new high when I discovered a pimple growing on my penis, which I now know is genital acne. It hurts to sit down or touch my penis in any way. The worst part is that I am only thirteen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 150

You deserved it 773

By Anonymous - 14/02/2010 14:21 - United States

Today, I realized that the "pimples" on my back weren't pimples at all. Because I was unable to see how bad they were for the last week, I never caught on to the fact the they were, in fact, ticks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 244

You deserved it 6 774

Spotted

By Bec99 - 19/04/2020 17:00

Today, the pimples on my face are finally clearing up. They seem to have migrated to my ass. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 631

You deserved it 142

Next

Top comments

cudi504 4

Wednesday 5 October 2011 22:06

How did you let them figure that out?

Sub_Zero_is_God 13

Wednesday 5 October 2011 22:08

at least you have a big dick.

Comments

professorxfm 7

Wednesday 5 October 2011 22:25

Gross!

perdix 29

Wednesday 5 October 2011 22:27

What a nice complement for the tiny one in your crotch!

metaloner19 6

Wednesday 5 October 2011 22:29

This is a first.

JayAyyEmm 0

Wednesday 5 October 2011 22:30

Least it's large, it could be small.

rocker_chick105 31

Wednesday 5 October 2011 22:32

Your friends need a hobby

BeeMaddness 0

Wednesday 5 October 2011 22:34

Ew. Back Acene is nasty

YayFlameWarz 9

Thursday 6 October 2011 15:36

So is sub-par spelling.

Btreasure 8

Wednesday 5 October 2011 22:35

Wow I've heard of 2 vaginas but never 2 penises.

Melisso 4

Wednesday 5 October 2011 22:37

Picture.

yumazing 0

Wednesday 5 October 2011 22:41

So many bad things about this post. Sorry. That sucks.

giraffemagic 0

Wednesday 5 October 2011 22:43

I guess you're the type of friend that let's them do that...haha you wouldn't have this problem if you didn't have back-ne. Like back acne...get some proactiv body wash on that!

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The Top

Today, I rushed home because my wife called to let me know she was feeling horny for the first time after getting over a bad flu. I walked in the door and surprise surprise, her sister had called round, wanting sympathy after her latest fuckbuddy dumped her. Romantic mood ruined. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 251

You deserved it 207

Today, I really wanted to spend a night of passion with my lover, so I'd arranged to meet him in a very classy hotel, gave him the room number, and waited for him in a super-sexy outfit. There was a knock at the door, so I opened it slowly and enticingly, assuming it was him. It was room service. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 402

You deserved it 11 952

The Top

Today, my boyfriend of two years broke up with me. Why? His best mate got dumped yesterday and my boyfriend thought it would be 'more fun' to be 'single lads together'. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 401

You deserved it 3 197

Today, my father cut my hair for the first time. Now, I always have to wear a cap when I go outside. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 519

You deserved it 880

Today, it was the marathon. My girlfriend, has a unique name spelling, ran and I cheered and passed her supplies at two different mile markers. I then noticed a guy I’d never met who had signs with her name at the same mile markers. She was too lazy to split up both her boyfriend’s mile markers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 863

You deserved it 94

Today, my only friend got banned from my house, all because she kissed her boyfriend in front of me. I'm 16, but apparently I can't handle seeing a kiss. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 217

You deserved it 1 602

Today, I found out that my "Dad", the man who couldn't afford to buy me a bed, despite sleeping on the floor for 3+ years, has spent well over $3000 on sex chat lines, as well as cheating us out of child payments. He doesn't understand why I refuse to talk to him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 442

You deserved it 128

Today, I was talking with my wife of five years, and I gave her a few hints about wanting kids. After our talk, she looked at me completely serious and said, "Yeah yeah, kids are great and all, but can't we just get you a dog?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 493

You deserved it 6 201