Miscellaneous: Today, my friends learned that if you play "connect the dots"...

By Hoggiebear - 05/10/2011 16:08 - United States

Today, my friends learned that if you play "connect the dots" with the pimples on my back the resulting picture is a large penis. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 391

You deserved it 5 369

Winter: Snow and Funny News
Snuggle up and laugh with our winter stories, where snow isn't the only thing sliding around! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 23/03/2016 14:36 - United States - Arlington

Today, my acne reached a new low. Literally. I'm now getting bright red pimples on my penis. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 795

You deserved it 2 848

By BYUwildchild - 17/12/2010 16:23 - United States

Today, I realized that the fish-shaped birth mark on the back of my leg, that I have had all my life, is not really shaped like a fish as I had originally thought. It looks just like a penis. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 953

You deserved it 3 529

By GeneralElement - 19/02/2010 06:32 - United States

Today, in math, I was working on an assignment and this really cute girl comes over and says my name. At this point, my heart is pumping with excitement and I'm thinking she is going to ask for my number. She said, "Did you know someone drew a penis on your back?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 923

You deserved it 3 659

By imblue42 - 24/06/2015 05:16 - United States

Today, I walked into the dining room to find my mom popping pimples on my dad's back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 245

You deserved it 3 701

Subconscious

By doodler - 27/02/2014 11:59 - United States - Hurst

Today, I was doodling randomly during a meeting at work, and I noticed my drawing was beginning to look a bit like a penis. A coworker was eyeing it so I tried to make it something else by adding... oh good, now it's a penis and balls. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 098

You deserved it 13 507

By balletteacher - 08/09/2012 20:32 - United States

Today, I realized my acne looks like star constellations. I've already found the Little Dipper on my left cheek. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 236

You deserved it 2 585

By mafiaguy800 - 27/08/2019 14:00

Today, I woke up to see my four year-old brother with a sharpie, trying to play “Connect the Dots” with my acne. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 508

You deserved it 152

Clean up

By Anonymous - 19/01/2024 03:00 - United States - Cary

Today, I realized that my lack of body hygiene reached a new high when I discovered a pimple growing on my penis, which I now know is genital acne. It hurts to sit down or touch my penis in any way. The worst part is that I am only thirteen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 150

You deserved it 773

By Anonymous - 14/02/2010 14:21 - United States

Today, I realized that the "pimples" on my back weren't pimples at all. Because I was unable to see how bad they were for the last week, I never caught on to the fact the they were, in fact, ticks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 244

You deserved it 6 774

Spotted

By Bec99 - 19/04/2020 17:00

Today, the pimples on my face are finally clearing up. They seem to have migrated to my ass. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 631

You deserved it 142

cudi504 4

Wednesday 5 October 2011 22:06

How did you let them figure that out?

Sub_Zero_is_God 13

Wednesday 5 October 2011 22:08

at least you have a big dick.

Comments

mynameisTiffany 0

Thursday 6 October 2011 2:01

niceee ha, there's always proactive.

LadyLexi 0

Thursday 6 October 2011 3:32

Wow. Are you dumb 96? He's talking about the acne shaped like a penis.

SHANK_a_F00 4

Thursday 6 October 2011 3:59

I guess I forgot to write /end sarcasm. You're not the smartest person either, are you? God.

ducttapewallet 7

Thursday 6 October 2011 5:27

Are YOU dumb 96? He was making a joke GOD.

hannahcorrine 0

Thursday 6 October 2011 2:04

Wow. Are you dumb 64? He's talking about his actual dick. God.

Spyderbane 10

Thursday 6 October 2011 2:04

knowing you can't see your back, your friends thought of a way to draw a penis on you

amarieeee 4

Thursday 6 October 2011 2:05

pictures of the outline or it didn't happen!

the1nfamousflynn 0

Thursday 6 October 2011 2:09

Pimple dick lmao

Rainbow_dumpster 28

Thursday 6 October 2011 2:12

That's not attractive. Hit the Proactive.

MCRaddict 0

Thursday 6 October 2011 2:31

haha i wanna c that now

Neonnight 0

Thursday 6 October 2011 2:53

Ew perverted back

holdenthemonkey 3

Thursday 6 October 2011 3:18

Do every other one it makes a ******. Try it!

HooahGal 6

Thursday 6 October 2011 3:47

Wow, you cant think of anything better to do than play with pimples? Ydi

SugarandSpicee 6

Thursday 6 October 2011 4:25

Dude, it was his friend who did it, not OP!

SugarandSpicee 6

Thursday 6 October 2011 4:25

Dude, it was his friend who did it, not OP!

Keywords

TV shows Miscellaneous Work Awkward Coworkers Politics Transportation Embarrassing Ironic Relatable Social Media Instagram Parenting Shopping AITA Am I overreacting? Jealousy Love Kids Pranks Friends Dogs Housework Cars Porn Technology Sports Health Accident Mental health

The Top

USA, USA, USA; well, almost. Today we're not welcoming a French artist, not even an American artist, but an artist from... oh, you'll see! Are you in a hurry or something? Why can't we just sit down, have a nice cup of tea and talk about the future? ...

I agree, your life sucks 10

You deserved it 15

Today, I came out as lesbian and introduced my new girlfriend to my family. My mom angrily told me that I should have waited until my grandparents had died before coming out, and that I was "extremely disrespectful" for making this announcement. I honestly thought everyone would be fine with it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 090

You deserved it 1 168

The Top

Today, after I was away for a couple of days, my wife told me she’s been doing laundry while I was gone. I'd reminded her to clean out the lint catcher because it might catch fire. I came home to a new dryer and a smoke damaged house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 993

You deserved it 110

Today, I found out my mom has been randomly searching my room. I've asked her repeatedly to stop, but she says it's her right as a parent. In retaliation I started searching their room when they were out, and found porn mags and DVDs. I confronted mom about it. Long story short, dad's in a hotel. What have I done?! FML

I agree, your life sucks 301

You deserved it 617

Today, I was making out with my boyfriend, when the Taco Bell I'd eaten for lunch came back up for round two. Undigested rice and beans got stuck in his hair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 141

You deserved it 7 743

Today, I realized people think my boyfriend is gay because he loves romantic movies, gardening, shoe shopping, reading magazines, and bathing by himself in candlelight. After him asking me to cuddle and me to be the "big spoon," I'm starting to question it too. FML

I agree, your life sucks 465

You deserved it 1 467

Today, I let my new puppy outside for the first time. When I went to get him, I saw a man running off with him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 610

You deserved it 12 809

Today, driving some friends back from a party I said, "Did everyone see Lisa totally hanging off of Pat tonight?! It was hilarious!!". There was a long silence, then one of my friends said "...you know Lisa is in the car, right?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 186

You deserved it 103 727

Same thing different taste

Subconscious

Clean up

Spotted

Top comments

Comments