Intimacy: Today, my girlfriend convinced me to do some bedroom roleplay,...

By Anonymous - 03/08/2013 20:01 - Portugal

Today, my girlfriend convinced me to do some bedroom roleplay, and we decided on acting out a job interview scenario. I suggestively told her that if she wanted to get the job, she'd have to use her mouth on something else first. She called me a pig and ended the roleplay right there. FML

I agree, your life sucks 62 126

You deserved it 9 200

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Same thing different taste

Easy

By FootinMouth - 18/07/2013 21:48 - United States - Louisville

Today, my girlfriend said she wanted to get a little crazy and try some role-play. "Act like you don't want it," she said. Without thinking, I replied, "Well, that should be easy." FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 480

You deserved it 54 667

Classically Abby

By shesanexnow - 19/08/2022 22:00

Today, my girlfriend screamed that I was a "filthy, sex-crazed pig-man" because I grabbed her ass. We were in her house, alone, and she was in the middle of giving me a long, deep kiss after I'd gotten off work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 329

You deserved it 209

I can't help it

By Anonymous - 14/02/2015 17:47 - Ireland

Today, my girlfriend wanted to roleplay as a schoolgirl. I was excited, until we started and she asked me to lick her "vajayjay". I cringed so hard, my skull practically caved in. I broke down laughing while trying to explain my cringing. Now she's pissed and I'm blue-balled. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 238

You deserved it 11 935

By nick - 27/06/2016 03:44 - United States - Highland Park

Today, my girlfriend started making pig noises during sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 472

You deserved it 2 108

By jigglypluff - 19/11/2014 05:27 - United States - Omaha

Today, my wife and I decided to try out role playing. She ended up having an anxiety attack when I said she wasn't turning in her homework. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 277

You deserved it 4 944

By Dontworryaboutit - 28/12/2009 10:16 - United States

Today, I tried to get my girlfriend of nine months to have oral sex with me. She was eating a hot dog. She then said, "If you ask me again, this is what I'll do to you." She then bit the hot dog in half. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 450

You deserved it 38 949

By Anonymous - 30/12/2015 15:21 - Canada - Aurora

Today, my girlfriend gave me my first ever blowjob. It felt like she was skinning my dick alive with her teeth. I had to pretend to finish myself off in the bathroom and tell her it was because I didn't want her to have to swallow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 161

You deserved it 5 568

By sn-511 - 01/03/2013 22:54 - Italy - Naples

Today, I was making out with my girlfriend, and after a while, she moved her hand down to my crotch. She felt my erection, then got up and yelled at me, calling me a horny pig for "assuming we were going to have sex." FML

I agree, your life sucks 69 035

You deserved it 5 994

Nun the wiser

By Anonymous - 11/07/2021 16:01

Today, my girlfriend offered to roleplay as a sexy nun, then dumped me, claiming my saying yes meant I was attacking her catholic faith and that I’m a sick, depraved criminal. She was the one who offered. I’m not remotely interested in roleplay, I only agreed cause I thought it was her kink. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 688

You deserved it 131

By too good - 24/10/2014 10:54 - United Kingdom - Dartford

Today, my boyfriend and I tried roleplaying a teacher-student during sex. We're both studying to be actors, so we ended up going into a really deep, emotional storyline that didn't end in sex at all. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 033

You deserved it 14 566

ILoveMyArm 15

Sunday 4 August 2013 2:54

She doesn't seem very qualified for the job...

bondgirl69 5

Sunday 4 August 2013 2:57

She might be into more freakier stuff like answering boring questions

Comments

chosha_fml 26

Monday 5 August 2013 5:48

Next time just ask if she has any special skills not listed on her resume that she'd like to demonstrate. No harassment there to upset her.

sematariux 7

Monday 5 August 2013 6:42

26, LOL... You made my night

superman3212 8

Monday 5 August 2013 21:37

oink oink WERRRRRT..

seahawksfan900 11

Friday 9 August 2013 3:58

Well atleast she didn't blow it...

cxex 23

Sunday 18 August 2013 17:52

You made a sexist comment, she got angry about it and yet it's HER fault? Right.

SneezyBear 27

Monday 19 August 2013 4:55

Yes, because suggesting to your partner in a roleplay to give you head is TOTALLY sexist. I really don't understand some people...

coytle 0

Monday 19 August 2013 18:17

What he failed to mention is that his girlfriend never asked to do bedroom roleplay. She had an interview and to prepare she asked him to help roleplay an interview. His mind jumped to sex and all he heard was roleplay. . Or not. I wouldnt doubt it though.

SneezyBear 27

Tuesday 20 August 2013 3:27

"Today, my girlfriend convinced me to do some bedroom roleplay". I'ma repeat that again, cuz you clearly missed it the first time you read it. "Today, my girlfriend CONVINCED me to do some BEDROOM roleplay." You either fail at reading comprehension or are a judgemental idiot, thinking he MUST have concluded it was sexual when it 'really' wasn't - tell me, how do you know this, hmm? Is it because he's a man? Are you sexist as WELL as stupid?

PizzaDeliveryGrl 19

Monday 4 November 2013 4:45

He said his girlfriend CONVINCED him to do BEDROOM. ROLEPLAY. I am very sorry (LOL nope) but I have never heard of a job interview being held in a bedroom. And if that has ever happened, well, that's the wrong type of job to be investing any thought in.