Intimacy: Today, my girlfriend told me to Google how to last longer in...

By anonymous - 16/11/2010 22:43 - United States

Today, my girlfriend told me to Google how to last longer in bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 863

You deserved it 11 678

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Same thing different taste

By wtf - 12/07/2009 16:20 - United States

Today, I was on my girlfriend's computer. When searching on google, her browsing history popped up. The first thing was "Best positions for a small penis." FML

I agree, your life sucks 92 043

You deserved it 14 508

By wow - 08/11/2010 18:23 - United States

Today, my virgin girlfriend who wanted to lose her virginity to me got on Google, and quizzed me on how to properly put on a condom. She doesn't trust me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 157

You deserved it 8 908

Time is money

By asdfasdf - 24/01/2009 15:14 - Canada

Today, my girlfriend said she didn't want to have sex because it takes too long. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 221

You deserved it 5 969

By Anonymous - 14/03/2013 16:59 - Germany - Dortmund

Today, my girlfriend and I were going to get intimate, so I masturbated before leaving my place, hoping it would help me last longer than usual. 10 minutes in, she shoved me off and started screaming at me, convinced that I've been cheating on her and practising with someone else. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 732

You deserved it 10 557

Double life

By Anon - 14/10/2010 08:00 - United States

Today, after a small fight with my girlfriend, I started to miss her, so I typed her name into Google on a whim. Surprisingly, I find a link to a blog in which the owner describes his ongoing effort to seduce my girl. During times she told me she was alone. Thanks babe. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 842

You deserved it 3 509

By Anonymous - 11/01/2013 05:17 - United States - Pass Christian

Today, my boyfriend and I decided to try some "prolonging gel" to help him last longer between the sheets. Surprisingly, it worked, and he lasted 3 times longer than usual. I can now enjoy 4 whole minutes of sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 526

You deserved it 6 692

By CoCo - 22/11/2008 04:03 - France

Today, my girlfriend came home with new condoms: Manix Endurance containing a numbing gel designed to help me "last longer". FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 176

You deserved it 11 638

You OK, bro?

By Dante - 21/05/2024 19:00 - Portugal - Povoa de Santa Iria

Today, my sister's boyfriend asked for tips on how to please her in bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 515

You deserved it 111

Planning

By stargate25 - This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff - United States - Denver

Today, my wife sent me a Google Calendar reminder for "sex". FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 270

You deserved it 11 968

By quick blow - 16/05/2012 02:53 - United States

Today, I received an email from my girlfriend listing 10 ways to stop premature ejaculation. Subtle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 936

You deserved it 7 369

Cuuba 0

Wednesday 17 November 2010 9:36

"Hey baby, why don't you come over to myspace and twitter my yahoo so I can google all over your facebook?" haha, awe yeeah.

ERTH_fml 0

Wednesday 17 November 2010 9:04

it's called MASTURBATION! twice a day should do the trick :)

Comments

Cyrus00 41

Thursday 15 January 2015 2:43

1 in 5 men suffer from premature ejaculation. Just sayin!

chewebb 8

Sunday 12 April 2015 3:40

All men should seriously research that topic.

Amateur_Dank 17

Wednesday 3 June 2015 16:32

Yet another unrealistic standard for men.

XSPENZIVE 4

Monday 3 August 2015 20:16

Easy, just keep saying, "I think I can, I think I can, I think I can!"

Keywords

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The Top

Today, my hateful mother-in-law showed up unexpectedly. I faked taking a phone call so the bitter old hag would leave me alone. She then pulled out her phone, called my number, and glared at me as my phone rang against my ear. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 723

You deserved it 13 099

Today, I had sex with someone new for the first time after my 10 year relationship ended. The person was a friend who had been making serious sexual references toward me on and off over the year I've known him. I don't know if I'm more embarrassed that he couldn't keep it up, or that I came from anticipation anyways. FML

I agree, your life sucks 985

You deserved it 303

The Top

Today, I ran over a squirrel. I saw it twitching, so I backed over it to end its suffering. It wasn't a squirrel; it was a kitten. The children it belonged to watched as I ran over their kitten. Twice. FML

I agree, your life sucks 453

You deserved it 311

Today, my roommate's pets conspired against me. "The dog ate my homework" has apparently become too clichéd for them. The new excuses are, "My cat chewed through my laptop power cable" and "The gecko ate my pen drive." FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 657

You deserved it 4 899

Today, I met my girlfriend's sister and within a few hours we were in love. Seriously, personality-wise I’ve had more fun today just talking with her sister than I have for over a year dating my girlfriend, including the sex. We don’t want to cheat and hurt her sister. This sucks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 469

You deserved it 1 180

Today, I was driving home when I saw my boyfriend chundering on the side of the road, into an old lady's shopping basket. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 188

You deserved it 2 781

Today, at 12, I went for a run across campus.‬ Why? I'd realized my 12:30 exam was actually at 12.‬ ‪FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 468

You deserved it 1 414

Today, I was about to lose my virginity to my girlfriend. Unfortunately, she started fake-moaning like a pornstar before I even entered her, totally killing the mood and my boner. She swore she hadn't moaned, accused me of not finding her attractive enough, and angrily left. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 752

You deserved it 7 616