Love, Awkward, Religion and Grandparents: Today, my grandmother gave me rosary beads for my birthday. She...

By kdgirl - This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, my grandmother gave me rosary beads for my birthday. She told me I'd better start praying for a husband. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 864

You deserved it 3 226

Thanksgiving: Turkeys and Skids
Family meals that turn absurd, because Thanksgiving is also about laughing at little disasters. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Thanks, I feel better!

By anon - This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff - United States - Port Saint Lucie

Today, I told my grandma my boyfriend had cheated on me. She told me that it was my fault for not straightening my hair, and for gaining a few pounds. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 976

You deserved it 3 032

You must conform

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2016 but it's good stuff - Germany - Titisee-neustadt

Today, I'm the only grandchild who regularly visits, calls, and runs errands for my grandparents, even though I live two hours away. I'm also their biggest disappointment because I'm not married. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 542

You deserved it 1 707

Miracles

By smyp - This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff - Lithuania

Today, my wife and I decided to celebrate Christmas Eve with her side of the family. When we arrived at her parents' house, I heard her mother say that Christmas miracles don't exist since my wife brought me along. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 760

You deserved it 1 688

By in this day and age.... - 19/10/2023 16:25 - United States - Dallas

Today, the first words I heard from my "good, Christian" future mother-in-law included a salvo of curse words and a hushed rant about "them dirty Jews". I'm culturally Jewish. This bodes well. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 192

You deserved it 1 826

You snooze, you lose

By propose_you_freakin_coward - This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - Singapore - Singapore

Today, I was insulted and harassed by my sister and her boyfriend, all because I proposed yesterday. They were angry I might get married before they did. They have known each other since primary school; I met my fiancée earlier this year. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 922

You deserved it 6 856

Self defence

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I went to my grandmother's house to pick up her cat to take him to the vet. She forgot who I was and sprayed me in the face with pepper spray. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 117

You deserved it 2 483

By oh why... - 20/12/2013 14:51 - United States

Today, I got a ransom note saying, "We have kidnapped your husband and won't release him unless you postpone the wedding." The wedding is tomorrow and it was in his handwriting. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 452

You deserved it 4 490

Treat yourself

By birthday bash - This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - France

Today, it was my girlfriend's birthday. She decided that her "gift to herself" would be to leave the loser who has been holding her back for two years. Hello, my name is Ben, and I'm that loser. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 211

You deserved it 5 240

Hungover

By RedheadA - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, my husband and I woke up to see my drunk mother passed out on our couch. She was wearing nothing but socks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 652

You deserved it 3 696

By kb - 18/11/2013 06:38 - United States

Today, my mother gave me a bottle of stool softeners as a gift at my baby shower. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 678

You deserved it 4 044

bluecat_fml 0

Tuesday 21 September 2010 9:12

grandma humor, never gets old :P

aardvarkish 15

Tuesday 21 September 2010 12:25

I think I would have said, "Don't worry. My boyfriend promised to leave his wife, stop selling drugs, and then marry me."

Comments

SnipingPanda 0

Wednesday 22 September 2010 1:35

owned by you grandma haha FYL

TheManPR 0

Wednesday 22 September 2010 3:35

sounds like a cool grandma. wish mine was a lil like urs lol

TomAndroidNinja 0

Wednesday 22 September 2010 6:15

So? YDI for being sensative.

black_knight402 0

Wednesday 22 September 2010 7:03

lol 2

pinapolee 4

Wednesday 22 September 2010 7:36

lolololololol so typical of grandmas

arcadelegend 0

Wednesday 22 September 2010 8:11

that was clever. dang.

lmhpdx 0

Wednesday 22 September 2010 8:22

You must be an ugly hag, you better start praying.

SkateElement44 0

Wednesday 22 September 2010 8:58

Hey...Cathlics you know?

MeganCello 8

Saturday 6 November 2010 1:00

catholics*...

nbooze 0

Saturday 6 November 2010 3:14

veryy!!

Keywords

Awkward Miscellaneous Embarrassing Work Sleep Dating Love Annoying Am I overreacting? Parents Health Mental health Furniture Kids Gross Friends Public freakouts Fight Cops Drugs Neighbours Medication Relatable Teenagers Dogs Animals Gamers Ironic Video games Zoom

The Top

Today, on the eighth day of my diet, I met up with my study group. Everyone was snacking on junk food while I stuck to carrots. Someone put a Snickers bar on the table. "God, I want you," I thought. Turns out I was thinking out loud. The guy next to me inched his chair away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 350

You deserved it 8 250

Today, I got dressed, did my hair, carefully applied my makeup, sprayed myself with perfume, grabbed my bag and put on my coat. I got to the door, and then realised that I had nowhere to go, nothing to do and none of my friends were answering my calls. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 486

You deserved it 537

The Top

Today, I finally felt ready to make love to my boyfriend for the first time. It all went great, until I tried putting the condom on him. In the process, I managed to nick his penis not once, but three times with my nails. His eyes brimmed with tears and he completely lost his erection. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 140

You deserved it 28 445

Today, when I signed into Amazon, their top recommendation for me based on past purchases was "The Brave Little Toaster" on DVD. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 357

You deserved it 25 850

Today, I must've misinterpreted the waitress when she said, "First come, first served." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 025

You deserved it 85

Today, it's been exactly 2 years since I graduated college. I make less money in my full-time job now than I did working part-time in college. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 174

You deserved it 3 139

Today, my doctor asked me to undo my bra so he could check my breathing without the straps restricting my lungs, I got home and told my friends how awkward it was. Not one of them has had this happen to them before. We all go to the same doctor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 949

You deserved it 5 449

Today, my mom argued with me that I should have went to an emergency room a further 18 minutes away from me, during a near fatal allergic reaction, so I would've received "better care." FML

I agree, your life sucks 871

You deserved it 81