Miscellaneous: Today, my house got robbed. They left a note: "Next time, we...

By Anonymous - 18/07/2011 04:26 - United States

Today, my house got robbed. They left a note: "Next time, we steal your souls." FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 146

You deserved it 3 736

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Family meals that turn absurd, because Thanksgiving is also about laughing at little disasters. More…

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Same thing different taste

By Sarah - 17/08/2012 07:45 - Canada - Penhold

Today, my house got broken into. They just made a mess. I saw a note on the kitchen table that read "There's nothing good here. You have shitty stuff." FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 142

You deserved it 3 069

By Anonymous - 26/06/2015 16:29 - United States - Woodland

Today, my house was robbed while I was at work. The robber left a note telling me my stuff was crappy and that they found my safe under the bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 652

You deserved it 2 160

By Anonymous - 21/07/2009 17:16 - United States

Today, I left a note on the kitchen table saying to leave the door unlocked because I lost my key. I come home to find our house ransacked and robbed. Minutes later, I found my key. In my pocket. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 402

You deserved it 60 594

Neighborhood watch

By TheAnnoyedNeighbor - 03/10/2011 06:08 - United States

Today, I came back home to find that my house had been robbed, one week after my neighbors. I was walking around my neighborhood to see if anything was suspicious, and discovered that my neighbors had put up a sign, reading: "Rob the neighbors, THEY don't have a security system." FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 599

You deserved it 3 290

By Anonymous - 01/01/2011 05:29 - Canada

Today, I went out for New Year's. When I got back, I found my house had been broken into. I found a note saying, "Happy New Year, sucker." FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 024

You deserved it 2 927

By Anonymous - 17/09/2013 17:23 - United States - Bessemer

Today, I came home to find that my house had been broken into. After assessing the loss, I saw a taunting note on the fridge saying, "Locks work best when the door's SHUT." My housekeeper had apparently left the door wide open. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 614

You deserved it 4 063

By Aaron - 01/12/2011 22:00

Today, my house was broken into. How? My mom left a key under a flower pot on the porch. She also left a note on the door saying so. He stole all of my guitars. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 535

You deserved it 2 749

By racello13 - 02/11/2015 15:26 - United States - Baldwinsville

Today, I've been robbed. I came home to find my oven door missing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 460

You deserved it 1 815

By Amanda - 19/11/2010 05:14

Today, my house was broken into. Apparently, I have nothing good enough in my house to steal, so they took my cake. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 337

You deserved it 3 841

By Lindso1 - 06/07/2018 01:30

Today, I came home to find my home had been broken into. Nothing was taken, but all the drains were plugged and the water left blasting on high, with a note that said “enjoy the mess”. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 223

You deserved it 244

TheRealBruce 12

Monday 18 July 2011 12:04

well y'all better put them in a safe

macdaddymady 8

Monday 18 July 2011 12:03

man that's some scary shit, it's time to move

Comments

caliguy08 17

Friday 23 September 2016 16:09

I'm sorry but from an outside perspective... that last part was pretty funny, though all in all I am sorry your home was broken into and you had your things stolen.

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I agree, your life sucks 275

You deserved it 4 080

If you want to be the next published artist, send an email to alice [at] fmylife.com including a link to your website/blog/DA. But DON'T send your illustration right away! You need first to get in touch with me, and I'll tell you what you have to do!...

I agree, your life sucks 9

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Today, I wanted to prank my roommate. So, I thought it would be funny to take all the toilet paper out of our bathroom. She thought it would be funny to wipe with my cashmere sweater. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 265

You deserved it 53 316

Today, I told my morbidly obese teacher that he had mustard on his chin. He tried to wipe it off and I said without thinking "No, your other chin." FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 352

You deserved it 101 172

Today, my mom reached the lowest point of her midlife crisis. She convinced herself she's psychic and grounded me for something she "knows" I'm going to do. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 095

You deserved it 1 990

Today, after dating a guy for 2 months, things seemed to be going well. I offered to buy dinner and trusted he would keep in mind that I'm a college student on a budget. He picked the restaurant, ran up the bill over $100, made me pay, and dumped me right after. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 172

You deserved it 676

Today, I'm 23, but my development was starved due to my overprotective parents. My peers never accepted me, even though I tried to find someone to be friends with. To this day, I've been told I come off as creepy by more women than I have fingers on my hands. I feel like a fifteen year-old walking around in a man's body. FML

I agree, your life sucks 504

You deserved it 148

Today, I smiled at a new kid and started a conversation with him, just to be nice. He later sent me 24 messages describing how strong his love for me is. I'm scared to go to school tomorrow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 090

You deserved it 3 752

Same thing different taste

Neighborhood watch

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