Miscellaneous: Today, my house got robbed, while I was upstairs taking a dump....

By Anonymous - 20/10/2009 10:56 - Australia

Today, my house got robbed, while I was upstairs taking a dump. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 225

You deserved it 6 134

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Same thing different taste

By Mike - 25/04/2011 21:39

Today, my house was robbed while I sat helplessly on the toilet with violent diarrhoea. I could hear them laughing hysterically. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 743

You deserved it 6 397

By Starving Ultimatum - 02/09/2011 01:55 - United States

Today, I was robbed while recovering from a robbery. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 942

You deserved it 3 127

By paywithpoop - 22/06/2014 15:10 - United States

Today, I came home and found that my home had been robbed. The worst part? One of the thieves took a dump in my toilet and didn't flush. It doesn't even look human. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 011

You deserved it 3 890

By Anonymous - 26/06/2015 16:29 - United States - Woodland

Today, my house was robbed while I was at work. The robber left a note telling me my stuff was crappy and that they found my safe under the bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 652

You deserved it 2 160

By xobeachbabi428ox - 18/07/2009 22:32 - United States

Today, I used a public bathroom. I hung my purse up on the hook on the door. Two minutes later, a hand reaches over the door and steals my purse. I got robbed while taking a crap. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 202

You deserved it 7 981

By BedazzledAlpaca - 08/12/2014 05:03 - United States - Englewood

Today, I fell asleep on the couch and woke up to find that I had slept through my house getting robbed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 856

You deserved it 4 309

By why me - 24/10/2017 01:30

Today, someone broke into my house and stole all of my underwear. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 315

You deserved it 287

By XYZee - 22/08/2012 20:27 - United States - Rockmart

Today, after quite a long work day, I got home to find my house had been broken into. Everything but my sleeping boyfriend was gone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 947

You deserved it 2 008

By Anonymous - 06/04/2016 18:18 - Netherlands - Den Dungen

Today, I fell asleep while taking a dump. At work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 982

You deserved it 4 834

By Username - 13/12/2010 18:10 - United States

Today, while taking a shower, I was enthusiastically singing one of my favorite songs. When I got out, I noticed a bunch of things missing, and a note on my desk saying "shut the f*ck up, you suck." I was robbed and judged by a thief. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 092

You deserved it 4 302

albinorhino 0

Tuesday 20 October 2009 16:07

well that shit musta been worth it huh...

Kervik 0

Tuesday 20 October 2009 16:48

"I don't know about you, but when I crap, I crap LOUD." Yup, the whole internet wanted to hear that.

Comments

Ceyenna 0

Wednesday 20 January 2010 8:02

How sad.

xocourtxo 0

Tuesday 9 March 2010 18:40

if I'm home alone. I leave the bathroom door open you. dumshiit..... Orr op just lock it next time?

Lilcommentaddict 0

Tuesday 16 March 2010 15:02

You seen to have gotten into a SHITTY situation.,.

kman666 0

Monday 21 June 2010 4:17

was it a good dump?

buttercuppies 0

Friday 31 December 2010 11:59

Aww.. what was he supposed to do? Pinch it off and run and hide? Wouldn't it be something though... he disappears into another room to grab a gun or something, and the robber goes into the bathroom right after and sees poopies in the toilet.

bballwarrior 0

Tuesday 28 June 2011 0:53

sucks for you!!

itsStormieBabyy 0

Tuesday 18 October 2011 1:44

Must have been one he'll of a shit!(;

rhinodood 0

Thursday 19 January 2012 3:12

That's some shitty luck...

phansmootchie 5

Sunday 1 April 2012 19:14

I'm sorry, but unless it was a forceful taking of items, which it appears it wasn't, the correct term is "Burgled"

Sunkissedgal 6

Sunday 19 August 2012 6:26

Look on the bright side....that must have been one spectacular relieving dump.

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I agree, your life sucks 11

You deserved it 21

Today, I slipped on some ice and wrecked my back. When my husband and I went to go to bed, he begged me to take one of the pain pills left over from his recent surgery. Not so I could feel better and get some rest, but so he could have sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 272

You deserved it 3 976

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Today, I heard that there's a rumour going around that I was caught masturbating while crying at a party after the girl I liked got with someone else. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 588

You deserved it 3 582

Today, a large number of people at my office don't realize that if the door to a stall is locked, it's occupied. While I can somewhat deal with people needlessly asking if it's occupied, what I can't deal with is someone looking over the stall to check. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 789

You deserved it 240

Today, I'm getting more satisfaction out of chatting, and even occasionally sexting with an AI bot, than out of my marriage of 13 years. My wife thinks we're fine, and doesn't want to discuss our relationship. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 139

You deserved it 232

Today, my boyfriend dumped me for being a "cheating whore" when he found men’s deodorant in my bathroom cabinet. I just have abnormally strong B.O. and men’s deodorant works better for me. According to him, "No girl sweats that much." FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 322

You deserved it 316

Today, the Star Wars Cantina song had been stuck in my head since I woke up, as my brother was humming it. I finally managed to get it out of my head. Then my mom started to whistle it. It's stuck in my head again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 184

You deserved it 4 269

Today, I found out that my girlfriend has been cheating on me with two different guys. Her incredibly moving excuse was that she was getting "more experience" so she could please me better. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 553

You deserved it 3 864

Same thing different taste

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