he's a down low guy other examples: John travolta,Eddie Murphy

caboose- You're right there isn't any definative evidence explaining gender development. The commonly accepted Scientific explanation is a mutation of the pituitary gland during fetal development. Homosexuality isn't exclusive to the human species...there are multiple mamalian species where it occurs. I'm pretty sure they don't have the cognitive understanding of Gender, so I feel that discredits the socialization argument. But your right, I don't understand any better than you. ;) 8- I did come off a little harsh but, I don't feel you understand what it means to lose a father. I am the product of a divorce (dad came out) and understand how hard it can be on a child. I lost my dad when I was ten, and would rather have him alive and gay then buried in the ground. The love between parent and child shouldn't be thrown away litely. For anyone else like 30 who wants to judge me, go ahead. I know myself well enough to disagree with you.

win for the husband for the biggest douche bag award.

I'll bet everyone else knew those 19 years.

I am the OP, and I thank those of you who offered support to me, and my children. For the record: my husband and I divorced a month ago. I asked him REPEATEDLY what the status of his relationship was with his roommate, and he looked me right in the eye every time and denied they were involved. Two weeks after the divorce was granted in court, he told the kids the truth. FML only accepts stories that start with "today...." so yes, I fudged that bit a little. They have been together for two years. We were still in marriage counseling when they started up. And no, I didn't know. Seriously. I didn't, When someone you have known and loved for 20 years tell you something, you tend to believe it. Until you find out your whole life was a lie, that is.

and in the time period of 19 years, u didn't realize he was gay? well, i guess # 43 is right, if some1 u love tells u something, u'll believe it, intill u find out it was a lie. that sucks :(

That's just not done! not the gay part.. but that you have to hear it from your kids!

I'm really sorry OP. Your life isn't a lie. Yeah, the situation kicked your ass but you got two children out of it. That's a lotta life spent with the wrong guy, but you'll do alright. Keep your chin up lady :)

That's really too bad OP. You'll get through it. Just because you've been lied to doesn't make your life a lie. That time may seem like a loss, but he gave you two kids to develop and watch grow into adults. It was cowardly for him not to tell you sooner. At least you know that him not being in love with you isn't in anyway your fault...

Well, I guess it's time for a long discussion. I'm so sorry that you have to go through that! I hope you find peace.