Work: Today, my last task for the day as a high school janitor was...

By waterproblem - 27/05/2009 23:10 - United States

Today, my last task for the day as a high school janitor was to power-wash the concrete area where the graduation ceremony will take place. Tired and bored, I drew a huge penis with the power hose. Right before I was going to wash it off, the machine broke. Graduation is tomorrow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 524

You deserved it 75 082

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Snuggle up and laugh with our winter stories, where snow isn't the only thing sliding around! More…

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Same thing different taste

By Worstjob - 03/03/2011 00:35 - United States

Today, I started my job as a high school janitor. A student decided to welcome me by taking a dump in the urinal. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 318

You deserved it 4 438

By Anonymous - 22/03/2017 17:00 - United States - Troy

Today, I saw some pretty heinous graffiti on the urinal stall at school, so I opted to scribble it out. A supervisor came in the second the pen touched the stall. Now I have detention and have to scrub the entire stall clean as a "lesson". FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 357

You deserved it 1 686

Live Laugh Love

By ihatewalmart - 29/06/2012 23:12 - United States

Today, while at work, I saw a kid empty his bladder all over the floor. His mother walked over, looked at me, said, "Yep… that just happened," and dragged him away. I'm a 30-year-old man, four credits shy of a Master's, stuck cleaning up piss at a dead-end job. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 059

You deserved it 3 210

By Crapper. - 16/09/2016 20:35 - United States - Fayetteville

Today, I'm a janitor at a middle school. Someone took a poo and placed it on the sink. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 180

You deserved it 732

The art, the artist

By waltzy777 - 26/04/2009 08:12 - United States

Today, we were having a family get together at my house. Because of this, I had to mow our lawn to make sure it looked nice. I got a little bored and decided it would be funny to cut a rather large penis into my yard. Right when I'd finished, I ran out of gas. My 83 year-old grandmother saw. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 612

You deserved it 83 051

Mystery unwanted gift

By Anonymous - 04/05/2021 07:59 - Australia - Bendigo

Today, I came back from school camp and really had to go to the toilet. I ran to the nearest one, which was by the principal's office. After I finished, I tried to flush the button. Turns out the water was turned off so it wouldn't flush. I bolted. The principal is now stuck with my unwanted present. FML

I agree, your life sucks 858

You deserved it 182

By fucker43 - 02/06/2013 06:11 - United States - Atlanta

Today, my friend made an effort to draw a penis on every page in my analysis textbook in pen. I have to return this tomorrow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 793

You deserved it 4 731

By Fingkids - 25/09/2012 01:51 - United States

Today, I fell asleep at work and woke up with penis sharpied on my face. I'm a kindergarten teacher. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 308

You deserved it 33 884

By WasteOfTime - 01/11/2009 14:36 - United Kingdom

Today, as I stopped at a traffic light, I noticed the man in the car next to me break out in laughter. I pulled over later on to see that someone had drawn a large penis on the side of my van. I then spent all my morning cleaning it off. I went outside later only to see someone had redrawn it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 358

You deserved it 3 449

By Himynameisjacob - 05/01/2010 07:18 - United States

Today, I was told that, although I was sick on the last day before break, they would still accept the 24 page essay that I had written. Tonight, as I went to print it out, I found that my dad had "cleaned up a bit" on my computer, including the documents from last semester. I have school tomorrow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 576

You deserved it 3 327

dianeface 0

Thursday 28 May 2009 9:52

Trust me, the high school kids will think its hilarious.

This_Guy 0

Thursday 28 May 2009 9:58

Just tell them that you actually did your job, but some kids drew that when you left.

Comments

Ihatecupcakes17 0

Monday 28 February 2011 0:25

This is fake. Seen one just like it with a lawn most. Why the **** am I wasting my time here?

life_sucks_screw 0

Saturday 19 March 2011 7:12

thats awesome

jademariie 0

Monday 11 April 2011 20:19

hahahaha omg.

nightheat 5

Sunday 15 May 2011 2:22

LIER!!!!! you stole this off the radio I heard the same thing you **** JK but still u stole this. :'(

MothsWings 4

Saturday 25 June 2011 3:43

That was silly of you! Just call it Senior prank.

Littlebrraatt 14

Wednesday 20 July 2011 11:00

For everyone calling OP a guy... SHE is a girl.

gccobra 0

Wednesday 10 August 2011 5:18

Holy crap rthe samething happened to me OP i drew a penis with bronzer on a basketball court and it wouldnt come off!!!!!!

Dflips 0

Wednesday 31 August 2011 6:52

I agree that it sucks cuz I woulda done the same

msbrendabella 10

Friday 16 September 2011 8:40

I don't know wuts funnier: ur fml or the fact that u r a janitor and u have an fml account haha XD

msbrendabella 10

Thursday 23 February 2012 12:55

Haha ok smart ass. When you think of a janitor what do you see? Most likely you will think of an older gentleman, right? I never said there was anything wrong with being a janitor, I was simply pointing out that it's unusual. Go troll somebody else! Your are seriously pathetic if you are trying to insult my spelling. It's not like this is some important online debate, it's a website where people submit stories of misfortune for ****'s sake! Get a life!