Miscellaneous: Today, my mom publicly pole danced. In a playground. FML - FML

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By Jess - 30/05/2011 15:46 - United States

Today, my mom publicly pole danced. In a playground. FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 089

You deserved it 5 037

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Same thing different taste

Inappropriate

By Pandistoteles - 14/04/2015 21:17 - United States

Today, I took my 5-year-old daughter to the play place at McDonald's but I had to keep her busy, instead of letting her play. A mom was teaching her 3-year-old daughter how to pole dance, using the play place's poles. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 544

You deserved it 2 730

By cookie_lover_xx - 15/10/2015 06:24 - United States - Chandler

Today, my mom ended up having a midlife crisis. She decided it was finally time to get those tight leather pants that she has always wanted, and is now planning on putting a stripper pole in her room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 572

You deserved it 2 054

By dancingqueef - 22/06/2016 02:39 - United States - Kingston

Today, my mom told me to break a leg before performing in my dancing school's show. I really did break part of my leg while performing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 761

You deserved it 1 195

By DrunkenMum - 20/07/2019 12:00

Today, I’m on holiday with my mum. She got so pissed, she fell over on the dance floor at the children’s disco, then had to rely on a stranger to keep her upright so I could go get the car to take her home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 540

You deserved it 111

By FunTimes - 19/08/2019 04:00 - Canada

Today, my mom got drunk and tried to push me off a ladder. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 689

You deserved it 124

By Messiahman - 30/10/2011 01:31 - United States

Today, I was playing twister with my girlfriend at the school carnival. I jokingly squeeze her butt, only to find her mom standing right above us. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 929

You deserved it 34 067

Sips unsee juice

By Facepalm2020 - 21/06/2020 23:01

Today, my mom asked me what twerking was. When I said that it was a club dance, trying to get out of telling her what it actually was, she begged me to teach her how to do it. My mom complained to my dad, who grounded me for not teaching her to twerk her ass. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 592

You deserved it 351

By Anonymous - 26/07/2019 04:00

Today, I came out of my bedroom to find my mom doing yoga in my hallway. Naked. She doesn't seem to think there's any problem with this. It's my house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 881

You deserved it 147

By bob - 05/02/2011 12:02 - United States

Today, I saw my mom run across the house naked for a condom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 162

You deserved it 4 220

By f_n_fail - 06/12/2016 21:31 - United States

Today, I got a note from my son's kindergarten teacher. During free time yesterday, he told her, "Mommy was stripping". I was indeed stripping. Paint that is. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 194

You deserved it 728

Next

Top comments

khaya 9

Monday 30 May 2011 18:58

Well it could have been worse, she could have started to strip and then demand money.

barmeywashere 0

Monday 30 May 2011 18:58

Speechless o.o

Comments

TKrisha_fml 5

Tuesday 31 May 2011 20:50

. . . . . .

MrsCaliBudz420 0

Wednesday 1 June 2011 0:51

wow

40ozRockstar 2

Wednesday 1 June 2011 0:52

Thats awesome parenting.

rosamarie 0

Wednesday 1 June 2011 2:37

Ever since I started reading this FML and it's comments, I have had 'Stacy's Mom' in my head. I do however feel this is appropriate.

Blanca781720 5

Wednesday 1 June 2011 3:43

my 7 year old niece did the exact same thing

Nachas1021 0

Wednesday 1 June 2011 5:17

mmmmmm milf

griffindragon97 3

Wednesday 1 June 2011 5:48

well u should of joined it would of been a family thing but fyl

Yessyy 0

Wednesday 1 June 2011 7:44

don't stop Get it Get it!

DaJaFa 0

Wednesday 1 June 2011 18:37

Wow…that's embarassing… P.S. Why are people saying OP deserved this? I see things on here all the time that are voted YDI when there is no way to blame them…just wondering how/why people can turn some of these events on the OP…just a question…

MrMan27 0

Wednesday 1 June 2011 19:32

Damn I wish I was that pole

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The Top

Today, I invited the guy I've been seeing for 5 months over. We got some chicken nuggets, but didn’t eat because he stripped my clothes off and we started having sex. Out of nowhere, he said, "I can’t do this!" and left. He took the chicken nuggets with him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 931

You deserved it 503

Today, as my boyfriend was climbing into bed, I asked him for a sandwich. He sighed irritably, so I reminded him that I'm a princess. He said, "I don't like monarchists" and went to sleep on the sofa. WTF? FML

I agree, your life sucks 53

You deserved it 1 265

The Top

Today, I found my 5-year-old son prancing around in high heels and cat ears, wearing a thong as a necklace, and waving a riding crop around like a sword. He'd found the box where granny keeps her special outfits that make granddad extra happy on Friday nights. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 592

You deserved it 412

Today, my partner and I were both horny at the same time. I entertained our 3 kids while he jerked off, then he entertained them while I went and masturbated. We live together and this is the first time we’ve been horny at the same time since Christmas, because we’re both so exhausted. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 663

You deserved it 428

Today, my sister surprised me by cleaning my room and doing my laundry. She found my journal, condoms and vibrator and decided to share her findings with my family. Oh yes... she also shrunk half my wardrobe. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 159

You deserved it 5 063

Today, I've had to accept that, despite my efforts to stay in touch with the few friends I made at college, I have zero friends. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 024

You deserved it 95

Today, I asked my kids how much they loved me. My seven year-old responded, 'I'll love you forever mummy.' My sixteen year-old responded, 'Can you wind down the window, I just farted.' FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 221

You deserved it 13 825

Today, I told my boyfriend that I was going to start controlling my drinking and he told me pretty much that he didn’t think I could do it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 230

You deserved it 375