Miscellaneous: Today, my mom stole the condoms out of my room and gave them... - FML

By dry spell - 02/07/2013 16:17 - United States - Belfair

Today, my mom stole the condoms out of my room and gave them to my little brother because I "won't be needing them anytime soon". FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 249

You deserved it 4 797

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 08/08/2019 22:00 - United States - Houston

Today, my mom barged into my room, threw 5 boxes of condoms at me, then said, "So you don't get pregnant". She still hasn't accepted the fact that I'm a lesbian. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 906

You deserved it 341

Egg mode

By KillahCam - 26/01/2010 00:15 - United States

Today, my ten year-old brother told me that his thirteen year-old friend took one of my bras and two pairs of my underwear a few weeks ago. Apparently he took them out of my room, put them on, and has been sleeping with them ever since. He's coming to give them back tomorrow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 122

You deserved it 2 603

Judgmental much!?

By Stairway2Heaven - 02/03/2009 21:03 - Canada

Today, I came home to find that my room had been ransacked. My mom comes out of nowhere and says that we need to have a talk. I freaked out thinking it was all the empty alcohol bottles under my bed. My mom holds up the birth control and says, "I always knew you were a whore." FML

I agree, your life sucks 69 661

You deserved it 19 449

By condiments - 22/02/2010 21:13 - United States

Today, I went shopping with my mother, when someone snuck a pack of condoms into our cart while our backs were turned. When we got to the register, my mom, whose wealth makes me ineligible for financial aid, noticed the condoms and she announced that she wasn't paying for the college I got accepted to next year because she doesn't want a promiscuous daughter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 147

You deserved it 3 061

By bob - 05/02/2011 12:02 - United States

Today, I saw my mom run across the house naked for a condom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 146

You deserved it 4 218

Why mother, why?

By Gee, thanks mom - 15/02/2022 14:00

Today, my mother yet again chose to put my brother's junkie of an ex-girlfriend's needs and happiness above mine, despite the fact that she's stolen thousands of dollars and anything else of value from my mom's house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 980

You deserved it 92

By NaomiMadison - 30/07/2011 05:15 - United States

Today, my little brother came into my room and hit me over the head with his baseball bat. He then dropped the bat onto my floor and ran crying into my mother's room proclaiming I stole his bat and beat him with it for fun. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 120

You deserved it 3 142

Get out

By Anonymous - 10/08/2014 17:24 - Germany - Würzburg

Today, my mother kicked me out of the house because her new boyfriend needs my room. Evidently he also needs my credit card, passport, and wallet too, because she kept all three, while tossing everything else out on the lawn. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 233

You deserved it 3 244

By Anonymous - 15/07/2009 00:37 - United States

Today, while at my boyfriend's house waiting for him to shower, his mother slams a pair of underwear on the table and tells me that if she ever finds something like that in her son's room again, she is forbidding him from seeing me. The underwear isn't mine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 813

You deserved it 2 639

By megan228 - 20/03/2009 21:16 - United States

Today, my older brother and some of his cute friends came over. When we were inside, my mom yelled to me, "I got you some bigger tampons because you leaked all over your new underwear." They all started laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 143 522

You deserved it 9 019

Next

Top comments

yoimtrollin 24

Tuesday 2 July 2013 22:35

And your little brother is what age?

rg350dx 29

Tuesday 2 July 2013 22:45

Sounds good. Bend over ;)

Comments

SuperDanielNL 23

Wednesday 3 July 2013 0:28

Get pregnant, that'll teach her, or poke holes in those condoms. On a more serious note, OP; get yourself out there if you are looking for someone and buy your own condoms and just hide them from flipped out relatives.

ebbalofstedt 9

Wednesday 3 July 2013 1:03

Haha love your mum

Cazz91 21

Wednesday 3 July 2013 1:12

"That will be $8.50 for those box of condoms please..."

BEButterfly 13

Wednesday 3 July 2013 5:03

Wow I'd say well if I get knocked up anytime soon you'll know the reason why!

jw90 18

Wednesday 3 July 2013 6:12

I wouldn't necessarily go out and start banging lots of girls to prove her wrong. Just go buy a new pack and wait for your time to come.

graceinsheepwear 33

Wednesday 3 July 2013 7:51

OP is a female.

lina_bean 5

Wednesday 3 July 2013 6:18

Ouch!!

mazor 22

Wednesday 3 July 2013 9:09

Dry spell is quite a catch, given the fml ;)

WhiteCrimson 23

Wednesday 3 July 2013 11:38

Damn your mom is open too alot of stuff... Dont go scratching in her drawers.....you might find alot of wierd stuff.

josh8215 21

Wednesday 3 July 2013 12:49

I imagined that in Aku's voice. I am now horrified.

JacobH34 10

Thursday 4 July 2013 21:35

A jar you say? Someone's confident.

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The Top

Today, as we packed for a vacation, I saw my boyfriend pack several pairs of the ugly gray socks he knows I hate. I took and threw them away before we left. One flight, cab ride, and furious argument later, I learned that one pair had an engagement ring wrapped up inside. FML

I agree, your life sucks 68

You deserved it 1 555

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I agree, your life sucks 12

You deserved it 18

The Top

Today, our art teacher told us we will have to build a giant Coca-Cola bottle made of smaller ones as our art project for next week, meant to represent the damage consumerism does to our environment. I think he doesn’t understand we will have to buy tons of Coke to get the bottles needed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 365

You deserved it 1 003

Today, my daughter found out what happens when my husband watches Mythbusters and doesn't heed the disclaimer to "Not try this at home." He feels bad about her cut face, but says he's proud he can throw a playing card that hard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 130

You deserved it 3 552

Today, I was walking on the sidewalk near my house when a car pulled out of a parking spot in front of a speeding ambulance. The ambulance swerved up onto the grass. Yes, I broke my arm after being hit by an ambulance. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 930

You deserved it 433

Today, the seat in my car broke and wouldn't move forward. I had to walk to school in the rain because I was too short to reach the pedals. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 569

You deserved it 5 939

Today, I went to work 300 miles away from where I live. I couldn't find my customer's address, so I decided to call him. I'd picked up my wireless house phone instead of my mobile. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 369

You deserved it 9 630

Today, my son said his first word. Unfortunately, that word was "cock." I've tried convincing myself that he's trying to say "clock" but I just can't do it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 246

You deserved it 7 769