Intimacy: Today, my mother and aunt got into an argument about who had...

By Anonymous - 05/08/2011 07:04 - United States

Today, my mother and aunt got into an argument about who had gotten groped more times in public. I don't know what's more disturbing, that my own mother would brag about getting groped, or that she won the argument, at 34 times. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 867

You deserved it 2 745

Thanksgiving: Turkeys and Skids
Family meals that turn absurd, because Thanksgiving is also about laughing at little disasters. More…

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Same thing different taste

Wanker

By oops - 09/02/2009 05:12 - United States

Today, I can't decide what's worse, my mom walking in on me doing the five knuckle shuffle, or the one hour talk the next day about how it's perfectly normal and even she does it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 398

You deserved it 8 868

By Anonymous - 14/09/2012 05:28 - United States - Fort Lauderdale

Today, I walked in on my mother rubbing one out. For the third time. I then had to explain to her, also for the third time, why pleasuring herself in the living room is inappropriate. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 099

You deserved it 2 790

By cantunhear - 20/12/2014 03:16 - United States - Fishkill

Today, my parents had a loud argument over who is worse in bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 235

You deserved it 2 464

Projection much, Mom?

By Anonymous - 10/12/2022 14:00 - United States - Bellevue

Today, my mother brought my sex life in front of an entire family gathering. I lost my virginity at 17 and when she found out she called me a whore. This time, she told the family I'd slept with 100 men by the time I was 18. I’m 40 and my body count is 10. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 667

You deserved it 240

TMI mom!

By Anonymous - 13/04/2022 16:00

Today, my drunk mom informed me that out of all my potential brothers and sisters she’s swallowed over the years she’s "glad" I’m the one she "accidentally drooled onto her crotch, swam up her fanny and invaded" her "virgin egg." This kind of shit is why I moved out at 16 and still have a therapist. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 548

You deserved it 154

By oliverP123 - 22/07/2011 04:11 - United States

Today, I walked in on my mom and her friends comparing the differences in their nipples. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 450

You deserved it 4 233

Me is what matters

By Anonymous - 15/08/2020 05:01

Today, my mother once again interrupted me and talked over me, as though I wasn't saying anything at all. Then she wondered why I remained quiet after she was done talking about her mother doing that. Must run in the family. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 440

You deserved it 119

By Anonymous - 10/09/2013 17:44 - Canada - Mississauga

Today, I realized that it's become a regular occurrence for my mother and me to talk about our pubic hair. I don't know which is worse, the fact that I now know that she shaves it, or the fact that we even talk about this stuff. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 162

You deserved it 13 914

Put it away!

By Need eye bleach - 05/04/2023 17:00 - United States

Today, a woman had a wardrobe malfunction right in front of me. As if that's not awkward enough, that woman was my own mother. FML

I agree, your life sucks 694

You deserved it 146

Family denial

By Anonymous - 29/07/2022 06:00

Today, after years of being guilted for never attending family gatherings, I told my aunt that seeing her son’s face is triggering for me, because he sexually assaulted me as a child and our family swept it under the rug, and acted like it never happened. She told me to grow up, and hasn’t said a word to me since. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 948

You deserved it 155

Bijaglo 3

Friday 5 August 2011 16:14

That's pretty disturbing..

icyfire617 10

Friday 5 August 2011 17:49

Today is also the day I'm staying inside. 0_o

Comments

hombrepollo 0

Friday 5 August 2011 16:30

I'll help you beat her record

androiddestroya 7

Friday 5 August 2011 20:14

what if it's a guy?

Person1233 12

Friday 5 August 2011 16:33

I'm glad to have made your mother happy.

A7X_LoVeee 10

Friday 5 August 2011 16:34

Why would she keep track of something like that?

charlie43 1

Friday 5 August 2011 16:35

must be a babe.

Zellpa 0

Friday 5 August 2011 16:44

I've been groped 61 times, beat that!

TheRealHouse 7

Saturday 6 August 2011 14:12

Actually it's been 69 times.. You just don't remember a few...

icyfire617 10

Friday 5 August 2011 17:49

Today is also the day I'm staying inside. 0_o

flee_fml 0

Friday 5 August 2011 17:50

MILF?

brainstorm23 0

Friday 5 August 2011 17:57

So im hoping your moms hot post a pic

notouchyy 6

Friday 5 August 2011 18:03

Hahaa reminds me of the movie mamma madea's like father like son "he's gropin me! hes gropin me! Somebody call the police!" wonderful movie :)

perdix 29

Friday 5 August 2011 18:26

What's worse is that your mom walked through a homeless shelter in a thong bikini, just to run up the score. There is no "mercy rule" for grope-a-thons.