Health: Today, my mum got a new blender. Dinner was roast beef, broccoli,... - FML

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By I'maboutobarf - 31/01/2013 10:28 - Australia

Today, my mum got a new blender. Dinner was roast beef, broccoli, cauliflower, pumpkin, potatoes and water. In a cup. FML

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You deserved it 2 785

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Same thing different taste

Juicer

By alcomom - 01/07/2020 02:02

Today, I spent ages prepping, chopping, bagging and freezing lots of fruits and veggies for my mom. I also bought her a juicer and alkaline water to help combat some of her health issues. I walked into the kitchen to see her mixing her juice with vodka and rum instead of the water. FML

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You deserved it 278

All grown up

By Anonymous - 22/07/2022 00:00

Today, I made broccoli and peas with dinner. My girlfriend pouted, sulked, and refused to eat "yucky veggies", demanding fries or chips. Apparently, I'm dating a fucking toddler. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 126

You deserved it 253

By iGreen - 09/07/2011 14:34 - Canada

Today, my mom cooked her dog some potatoes, carrots, beef, rice and peas. She cooks better food for her dog than she will for our family. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 550

You deserved it 3 631

Blasted

By Fauna - 09/05/2019 04:00

Today, I started to make a protein shake to have a healthy breakfast. It exploded. Turns out, my mom lost the rubber gasket and put the blender back, so it looked ready to use. By the time I cleaned it all up, it was time for me to leave for work. I'm now eating chips from the vending machine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 761

You deserved it 174

By emeraldarcher74 - 19/11/2016 18:34 - United States - Lake Stevens

Today, my mother made me a delicious meal of gravy, stuffing, mashed and sweet potatoes, and cranberries. Overjoyed, I tried to give her a hug. Instead, I accidentally punched her in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 274

You deserved it 1 353

By WhatdyaDo - 16/03/2009 09:55 - Canada

Today, I spent a solid four hours and over one hundred dollars preparing a nice fancy meal for my new girlfriend. A delicious three pound rack of ribs with a sweet and sour marinade. Steam broccoli with melted cheese. Home made buttermilk biscuits. I serve the meal. She doesn't eat beef. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 953

You deserved it 69 356

By Jensa - 16/01/2015 21:59 - United Kingdom - Buckingham

Today, my mother kindly brought me some soup as was recovering from having my tonsils out. Spicy Mexican bean soup. Yep, very spicy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 974

You deserved it 2 561

Smooth blend

By Anonymous - 08/04/2023 16:00 - United States - Boston

Today, I was excited to try out my new blender, but when I turned it on, the lid flew off and sprayed smoothie all over my kitchen. Now I have a fruity polka dot pattern on parts of my kitchen's walls and ceiling. FML

I agree, your life sucks 618

You deserved it 356

By LameChef - 10/03/2015 18:43 - Poland

Today, after years of providing daily various home-made colourful meals for three kids and a husband, I was asked to "cook something cool, like instant hamburgers, not that lame healthy shit". FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 178

You deserved it 5 031

Healthy lifestyle goals

By Anonymous - 06/04/2023 10:00

Today, I made a healthy, delicious dinner. My girlfriend picked at it until it went cold, then stuck it in the fridge. Later, she devoured a giant bowl of sugary cereal, then complained all night that her stomach hurt. This happens a lot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 835

You deserved it 194

Next

Top comments

Catkam623 27

Thursday 31 January 2013 16:41

Hey athletes take everything in liquid form and now, so do you:)

Pleonasm 35

Thursday 31 January 2013 16:43

She is so considerate, doing the mechanical digestion part for you, so you don't have to! She is saving you time and energy!

Comments

Zebediabolical 39

Thursday 31 January 2013 18:34

Where I'm from we call that 'soup'

buckdharma 37

Thursday 31 January 2013 18:40

"goop" *

mosquito19 14

Thursday 31 January 2013 18:37

in America, we call that Vomit. you're eating vomit.

olhuma 5

Thursday 31 January 2013 19:31

That too will pass... Or you can accelerate the downfall by replacing all the bowls and silverware at home with flat plates and chopsticks...

BobbieH 19

Thursday 31 January 2013 19:42

Wow that's disgusting! FYL! But hey, you have the convince of dinner through a straw!

ksks1234 33

Thursday 31 January 2013 19:46

Thank her for the convenient, on the go meal. Then, tell her you're going to the library, dump the meal out on the side of the road, and get some real food.

cmbar831 14

Thursday 31 January 2013 20:24

My dad blends his breakfast in a blender. It contains vegetables, salad and kale, lemons, tomatoes, spices, Asian ginger, and more things that are disgusting together. :((

xXAHXx112 13

Thursday 31 January 2013 20:38

the real question is, who has pumpkin with roast beef?!

sesor 7

Thursday 31 January 2013 20:42

She's crazy. Tell her that a roast is a roast, and soup a very different meal.

zombiejohn 10

Thursday 31 January 2013 20:47

Will it blend? That's the question

The_Honey_Badger 17

Thursday 31 January 2013 21:05

Delicious.

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Today, I started at my new job. My manager, upon meeting me, hugged me and sniffed my neck, then commented that I smelled "natural" and told me how much he loves that. I have to work with this creep until god knows when. FML

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