Miscellaneous: Today, my neighbor - whose first words to me when I moved onto...

By Anonymous - 20/02/2016 12:16 - United States - Chicago

Today, my neighbor - whose first words to me when I moved onto the block were "I don't like your face" - called the cops and claimed I'd been exposing myself in public. His lowlife buddy backed him up on his lie. I'm pretty sure I'm going to end up in deep trouble thanks to them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 261

You deserved it 1 294

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Not taking it well

By runsinthefamily - This FML is from back in 2014 but it's good stuff - United States - Aurora

Today, my neighbor called the cops on me, claiming I'd threatened him with a gun. Despite zero proof, they took me to the station and gave me hell. I guess what I've learned today is that you should never offend your crazy neighbor by breaking up with his daughter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 003

You deserved it 4 635

By inyobeddd - 02/05/2013 08:27 - United States - Los Angeles

Today, my crazy neighbor came up to me in the street and slapped me across the face, accusing me of leering through her restroom window while she showered. I'm gay. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 927

You deserved it 6 719

Nice neighborhood

By Anonymous - 11/10/2015 15:34 - United States - Lexington

Today, I awoke to the sound of my neighbors attacking my car with a baseball bat accusing me of calling the cops on them. I did call the cops on them, after they screamed at me last night, drunkenly, to call the cops for them because they thought they were being robbed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 974

You deserved it 1 791

Scruffy 'erbert

By Anonymous - 14/09/2019 00:02 - United Kingdom

Today, I was in the garden of my new house when a neighbour came over and told me to clear off or she would call the owner to tell them they were being burgled. When I told her I was the owner, she said I was clearly unsuitable to be living on this street, and to stop lying before she called the police. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 188

You deserved it 134

By Mybrotherissatan - 10/03/2016 15:59 - United States - Arrington

Today, I found out why people in my new neighborhood keep giving me weird looks. For a laugh, my brother had gone around telling them I'm a parolee, and implying that I couldn't be trusted around their children. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 629

You deserved it 1 330

Good samaritan

By tryingtohelp - 24/05/2020 20:00

Today, I heard my downstairs neighbor being beaten by her husband. I anonymously called 911, hoping to help. She must've seen me giving the cops my statement because as soon as they left, she knocked on my door and punched me square in the face while screaming, "Mind your own business bitch!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 367

You deserved it 409

By Anonymous - 13/02/2015 20:24

Today, my thundercunt of a neighbor, who's hated me since I moved in, called the cops on me. He told them he saw me shooting up on drugs. I'm diabetic and was injecting insulin, which he could only have seen by spying on me through my living room window. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 004

You deserved it 2 226

Trash

By Anonymous - 02/04/2017 16:00

Today, I confronted my lousy, loud, messy neighbors about the trash they throw in my yard. They responded by throwing my trash in their yard, then called the police to report me for vandalism and illegal dumping when I returned their trash. Guess who has a court appearance in two weeks… FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 817

You deserved it 445

By JubileeBee - 28/09/2011 10:46 - United States

Today, I found out that my seemingly innocent 80-something neighbor has been stalking every girl in the neighborhood, and considers me his girlfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 367

You deserved it 2 418

Give it back

By psycho - 16/02/2022 19:00 - United States - Hesperia

Today, I was on my patio trying to take photos of the amazing sunset. My phone slipped out of my hands and landed on my downstairs neighbor’s patio. When I asked for it back, they slammed the door in my face. I tried to climb over and get it myself. They called the cops on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 092

You deserved it 184

Idiotskillme 20

Sunday 21 February 2016 6:45

Don't worry too much, OP. They'll need some kind of proof and when they don't have it the cops won't be too happy with them.

xKrisSmoove 21

Sunday 21 February 2016 6:54

Get yourself some alibis OP, you'll need them, then you can possibly counter sue the bastards

Comments

GhostFox 33

Sunday 21 February 2016 8:00

Better get a lawyer on standby, and start getting a list of people who can vouch you wouldn't do what you're being accused of doing. Also be ready for issues at work and social matters in case word of the accusations spread. Good luck, hope that things get dropped due to lack of evidence.

anonymous198913 26

Sunday 21 February 2016 8:15

If you do end up in court (knock on wood), they can't prosecute you without proof. I recommend moving away as soon as this mess is over.

Y0UI34574RD 15

Sunday 21 February 2016 8:34

I really hope you don't live in Manitowoc county.

FitFriday 32

Sunday 21 February 2016 9:41

That was not very neighborly of him, FYL OP

techiejames 8

Sunday 21 February 2016 11:19

Camera up your house, inside and out. Hopefully you will be in the bathroom the next time you "expose" yourself

Binglebeee 16

Sunday 21 February 2016 12:17

Potentially you could turn this round into a harrassment case and also slam his friend for perverting the course of justice

XandWacky 23

Sunday 21 February 2016 16:03

Without proof, it won't go far. Then you can probably sue for defamation of character

Thunder_35 10

Sunday 21 February 2016 16:34

Sounds like some "Making a Murderer" type of shit.

shitstorm28 11

Sunday 21 February 2016 16:40

1. when dealing with guys like that, always have an alibi. Use the check in function on your Facebook in case they say you did something when you weren't around. 2. filing false police reports is a crime. prove they did it. 3. once you have proof, sue them for defamation of character.