Intimacy: Today, my parents kicked me out of the house because they were... - FML

By why god - 25/11/2013 06:16 - United States - Huntington Park

Spicy

Today, my parents kicked me out of the house because they were having a party. They gave me twenty bucks to go see a movie. Well, the movie ended pretty quick, but the trauma of seeing my parents in a swingers' orgy will take some time getting over. FML

I agree, your life sucks 74 990

You deserved it 6 349

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Same thing different taste

By moviewalker - 26/11/2009 06:18 - United States

Today, my parents and I went to the movies for my mom's birthday. After the movie, my mom and dad got into a fight, and left me at the movies. My cell phone was dead, and my house was about 12 miles away. They finally came and picked me up, hours later. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 893

You deserved it 3 179

By ohgodwhy - 06/04/2013 14:15 - Canada - Elliot Lake

Spicy

Today, I was watching a movie with my parents when a sex scene came on. As if that wasn't awkward enough, they started making out on the couch behind me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 63 388

You deserved it 5 713

By Syferix - 18/03/2009 22:42 - United States

Today, I was leaving to go over to a friend's and my parents suddenly ask if I'm gay. I reply that no, I'm bisexual. My mom then asks if I've ever made out with someone of the same sex and I say yes. She turns to my dad and says 'I told you so. You owe me $20'. My parents bet on my sexuality. FML

I agree, your life sucks 110 656

You deserved it 27 061

By college kid - 31/07/2010 04:39 - United States

Today, I found out that the day I moved out of my parents' house, they invited my whole family over and had a party to celebrate the fact that I was gone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 238

You deserved it 5 381

Confinement's gonna be fun

By Anonymous - 16/03/2020 23:01

Spicy

Today, I left the house to get groceries. My parents asked me where I was going and how long I would be gone for. Thinking they were just being inquisitive parents, I ignored them. I got home 20 minutes later to them having sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 822

You deserved it 2 396

By myparentsarehoes - 03/08/2009 16:33 - Canada

Spicy

Today, I was at a bar with my friends for my 19th birthday when I saw my dad grinding some chick that was not my mom. I confronted him and told him I was telling mom. He then pointed across the bar to my mom with another man. I just found out my parents are swingers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 76 326

You deserved it 5 767

Baseless assumption

By Greymoya - 24/02/2010 14:18 - United States

Spicy

Today, I was very sick, and my boyfriend was taking care of me at his parents' house. I was laying on the couch, innocently watching a movie while he rubbed my feet, when his stepmother came home from work. She freaked out, accused us of having it off on her couch, and kicked me out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 690

You deserved it 2 606

Lost

By daenerys stromboli - 28/12/2013 18:11 - Ireland - Navan

Today, my parents started fighting at a restaurant. Embarrassed, I went to the restroom to get away and stayed in there for about 15 minutes, knowing how long their fights can last. When I came back, they were gone. They'd ditched me, and left me to walk several miles back home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 041

You deserved it 4 693

Too much information, thanks

By Anonymous - 15/07/2023 18:00

Spicy

Today, I’ve had to listen to my parents discovering that they were both cheating on each other. As I left, they were screaming at each other. When I got home, not only had they calmed down, they were openly discussing whether their other partners might be interested in foursomes or swinging. Ew. FML

I agree, your life sucks 969

You deserved it 127

By alison89430 - 05/12/2016 22:35 - United States - Birmingham

Today, I went to see a movie with my parents. During a sex scene, my dad covered my eyes. I'm married and have 2 kids. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 976

You deserved it 980

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Top comments

silverhuntress 4

Monday 25 November 2013 16:06

WTF!!!!! Wow... I'm so sorry that you had to see that...

turtlemanz 8

Monday 25 November 2013 16:07

You decided to swing by at the wrong moment

Comments

AutumnReflection 7

Wednesday 27 November 2013 15:27

That is so messed up!

stasia99 5

Thursday 28 November 2013 2:33

That's awkward

israelnotjacob 20

Thursday 28 November 2013 16:00

So was the movie good? What did you go see?

colbert0987 3

Thursday 28 November 2013 18:58

what kind of Dwight Schreut family are you from

hickeyboy42 11

Thursday 28 November 2013 23:24

I would disown myself

sunnydays1999 3

Friday 29 November 2013 18:13

I would be scarred for life

sunnydays1999 3

Friday 29 November 2013 18:21

Did they at least have fun?

blayzie420 7

Friday 29 November 2013 20:27

damn...shit...that's whack.

coklara 15

Saturday 30 November 2013 8:34

Did they record it? If so, where can I watch? Lol #swag #yolo

drew_giron 4

Friday 20 December 2013 16:07

Just move out. I don't care where just move. This could have happened before and you could have sat in a semen stained couch.

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The Top

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I agree, your life sucks 12

You deserved it 18

Today, after two months of being broken up, and my ex still insisting she hadn't been cheating on me, I declared via text my intention to burn the rest of her stuff in the yard. This resulted in the guy she "hadn't been cheating on me with" kicking in my door. FML

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You deserved it 389

The Top

Today, I found the iPod touch that my mother claimed was stolen at the mall a few years ago, lying on her bed, still logged in to her Facebook. Thanks, mom. FML

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You deserved it 4 226

Today, I sharted while skiing - wearing a bib outfit and no change of clothing. FML

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You deserved it 418

Today, while having lunch with my grandparents, my grandpa's eyes glazed over, his head fell and he slumped in his chair. I started panicking and almost cried, thinking he was dead. Then he laughed and said "Just kidding. I'm fine." FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 171

You deserved it 2 697

Today, my boyfriend got drunk and had a fistfight with a dumb teenager, which was bad enough, but he also lost the fight, which was just pathetic and embarrassing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 475

You deserved it 267

Today, I had to explain to one of my friends that the cap he likes to wear makes people look at us funny in public. He thinks it's just the White Sox logo. It's styled like the baseball team's logo, but it actually says "Sex". I had to show him both side by side for him to see it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 405

You deserved it 110

Today, I was rearranging the cabinets above the washer and dryer, and the whole thing fell down on top of the washer. I had just put my clothes in the washing machine too. FML

I agree, your life sucks 725

You deserved it 98