Miscellaneous: Today, my parents told me they were going out for dinner tonight....

By unloved - 23/03/2009 18:34 - United States

Today, my parents told me they were going out for dinner tonight. I jokingly responded "Sweet! I am totally having a keg party then!" My dad responded "Keg parties are only for kids who have friends." He was serious. FML

I agree, your life sucks 76 942

You deserved it 8 713

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Family meals that turn absurd, because Thanksgiving is also about laughing at little disasters. More…

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Same thing different taste

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By its_all_legit - 19/03/2009 03:47 - United States

Today, my parents, who are out of town but driving back tomorrow, called to see how I was doing. They asked if I'd thrown a party in their absence, and I said no. My dad replied, "Well I'm currently looking at pictures on Facebook of our kitchen with beer and a bong on the table." FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 464

You deserved it 127 826

By Anonymous - 08/02/2013 22:38 - United Kingdom - Romford

Today, I told my parents that I was going to hang out with some friends. My dad guffawed and said, "Ooh, look at Mary, pretending she has a social life." Thanks, Dad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 445

You deserved it 3 317

By Wino - 05/12/2009 04:08 - United States

Today, I went to the grocery store to stock up on booze for the weekend. After the cashier commented on the size my purchase, I claimed to be hosting a dinner party tonight. I'm not. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 787

You deserved it 34 547

Carded B.

By Anonymous - 20/09/2019 12:00

Today, I ordered a beer with my parents at dinner. The waitress said, "Oh, happy 22nd birthday." My parents eyes got really big, and they started to blush. They'd forgotten it was my birthday. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 338

You deserved it 191

By srs - 11/08/2018 20:30

Today, my parents yelled at me for coming home drunk from a party last night. They said I couldn't hang out with my best friend anymore as he's a "bad influence". He was the only one sober in our group and drove me home safely. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 080

You deserved it 513

Thanks everyone

By HappyBirthdayToMe - 10/04/2023 11:00 - Ireland - Waterford

Today, I'd organized a small dinner with immediate family for my birthday. I’ve since received texts from every one of them, cancelling due to varying reasons. My parents excuse is the funniest - they went out last night for a coworker’s party, and don’t want to go out again tonight. For me. Their child. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 028

You deserved it 128

Supportive

By arch maester shavayalsharashion - 26/07/2015 17:29 - United Kingdom - Surbiton

Today, I was pouring my heart out to my dad about how I'm such a loser and how I have no friends. He listened sympathetically, until his phone buzzed with a text message. He said, "Balls, the guys from work wanna get shitfaced!" and took a rain check on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 815

You deserved it 2 935

By Anonymous - 09/03/2015 12:15 - Australia - Melbourne

Today, I told my Dad I was an alcoholic and had decided to seek help. His reply, "Don't stop drinking, you are the life of the party, funny and beautiful when you drink." FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 365

You deserved it 3 523

Bully

By ninjawhat1337 - 25/05/2009 04:14 - United States

Today, I told my dad that I was going to sleep over my friend's house this weekend with a few other guys to play Dungeons and Dragons. He responded with, "Oh, back in my day, me and my pals used to pick on the kids who played Dungeons and Dragons." FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 686

You deserved it 57 257

By dog_day - 19/12/2009 06:20 - United States

Today, I was asked by my mom if I could have a joint birthday party with her dog, because it would be the dog's "Big 1-0." She was completely serious. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 415

You deserved it 2 701

amirn86 0

Monday 23 March 2009 23:26

At least he didn't object to the party!

ohhboyy 0

Monday 23 March 2009 23:32

I love how parents are so straight up to their kids

Comments

Jasper_fml 0

Monday 23 March 2009 23:41

#5 inorite. :)

zaveeshaveesh3 7

Thursday 3 November 2011 1:57

It's called a spacebar

nomadxx7 0

Monday 23 March 2009 23:47

@12 Spacebar broken?

kk_fml 0

Monday 23 March 2009 23:48

this exact story has been posted on this site so many times with a few of the details changed

njwrestler171 0

Monday 23 March 2009 23:52

ahahahahah thats an amazing response....ur dads the man

latuka 0

Monday 23 March 2009 23:52

#14 really? cuz i've read them all and none have been the EXACT with a few details CHANGED. -- i thought exact things had nothing changed. so when a few have been changed, it is no longer exact. and there a loads of inexperienced keggars who have sarcastic/assholic dads out there, so im sure its happened to more than one person in the world, so i wouldn't be surprised to see a story like this one on here again.

ajp156 1

Monday 24 May 2010 5:31

exactly

starbaby 0

Monday 23 March 2009 23:52

Parents are so straight forward its hysterical I love it! I can't wait to say messed up things to my kids when they think they are being slick

x_LC_x 0

Monday 23 March 2009 23:54

#14- I agree with you. It's getting lame.

uhnonnuhmus 0

Monday 23 March 2009 23:55

This is NOT an FML. This is probably from some ten-year-old who doesn't know how to tell a joke from a serious statement. Your dad was JOKING, you moron, so you totally deserved what you got. I wouldn't be surprised if he were serious, come to think of it. If you can't take a joke from your own FATHER, then how do you interact with non-relatives? Score- Dad: 0 (because he's funny, but has a stupid kid) You: -1 (for being a moron)