Transportation: Today, my roommate and I were walking to a bar and a group of...

By Anonymous - 09/05/2009 13:53 - United States

Today, my roommate and I were walking to a bar and a group of guys shouted out at us "Hey, it's like we're on Animal Planet, I see a zebra and a gorilla." My roommate was wearing a zebra print shirt. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 574

You deserved it 5 129

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Same thing different taste

By kaleigh - 31/05/2011 17:01 - United States

Today, as I was walking out of a restaurant with my boyfriend, I saw some guys checking me out. One of them walked up to my boyfriend and said, "Dude, you and your girlfriend have matching moustaches!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 803

You deserved it 10 197

By arse-face - 28/06/2013 23:22 - Ireland - Caher

Today, a group of friends and I went out to a fancy club together. The doorman checked us out and let everyone in. Everyone except me, that is. The doorman's reason: "Her face looks like a baboon's arse." My "friends" all went in anyway, leaving me to walk all the way home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 998

You deserved it 4 866

By foojew93 - 09/08/2009 17:41 - United States

Today, I was walking at a section of the zoo where you are in the cage, and the monkeys are climbing outside of the cage. I was having a great time until I looked up and one of the monkeys urinated all over my face. Not only did everyone see, but there was no way for me to shower for six hours. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 313

You deserved it 3 833

By Anonymous - 15/05/2012 03:52 - United States

Today, I walked in on my dad introducing his stuffed gorilla to his cat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 942

You deserved it 2 919

Mystery

By mugged - 01/06/2010 23:41 - United States

Today, I got mugged by someone wearing a bear suit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 266

You deserved it 4 713

Animal union

By Anonymous - 01/02/2023 10:00 - United States - San Diego

Today, I went to the zoo to see all of my favorite animals. When I got there, I realized they must've all been on strike or something, and refused to come out of their enclosures. FML

I agree, your life sucks 585

You deserved it 279

By Anonymous - 12/07/2011 01:12 - United States

Today, I met a really nice guy. He was funny, handsome, and we were both into each other. He told me his name, and when I replied with mine, it came out sounding like "I'm a bear." FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 954

You deserved it 16 364

Look!

By dinosaurboy - 06/02/2010 20:01 - United States

Today, my mom and I went to the mall to look for some boxer briefs. While looking, I saw two girls I knew from school, so I went over to say hello. At least, that was my plan, but my mom screamed, "Look! These have dinosaurs on them!" They left the store giggling. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 693

You deserved it 5 464

By confused - 07/04/2013 14:51 - Australia - Glen Waverley

Today, I was at University when a giant mascot started walking in my direction. As they walked past, they whispered my name seductively. I still don't know who it was. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 670

You deserved it 5 333

By campus pussy - 22/03/2014 21:08 - United States - Ross

Today, I woke up, ate breakfast, and left my dorm room, only to see about half a dozen people and my roommate shuffling around in the hall. Their zombie outfits and limping were so realistic that I freaked out and ran back inside, screaming. They think it was the greatest prank ever. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 022

You deserved it 11 436

jazminbliss 2

Saturday 9 May 2009 20:14

then shout back "yeah and I see a bunch of asses"

Exhumed91 0

Saturday 9 May 2009 20:18

You should have asked them if they want to do it like they do on the discovery channel

Comments

shaBAMalex 0

Saturday 9 May 2009 21:12

what the hell is with all of the racist comments? seriously, guys.

PTERONOPHOBIA 0

Saturday 9 May 2009 21:14

lol @ the racism brigade. You do realize that gorillas are a dark colour right? OMG LIKE BLACK PEOPLE!

FBIWarning 0

Saturday 9 May 2009 21:17

#22 = win

ohhhhshizzz 0

Saturday 9 May 2009 21:18

#32: Don't be a troll, you are stooping very low. And there are many things I wanna say right now. But! I will stay nice and just kindly tell you to: shut the **** up, you racist bitch. *Things are so easy when you don't yell and say things nicely.