Love: Today, my roommate brought a kitten to the apartment. I hate...

By Anonymous - 25/02/2010 00:29 - United States

Today, my roommate brought a kitten to the apartment. I hate cats, and probably sensing this, the thing clawed me right in the crotch. I of course am not going to say a thing because I happen to be in love with my roommate, but she has no clue how much I hate this thing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 985

You deserved it 28 084

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Same thing different taste

Roommate from Hell

By fishyrael - 08/08/2024 14:00 - United States - East Lansing

Today, my extremely affectionate and docile cat, whom I love like a child and has never drawn blood, scratched my roommate of one day in the face while I was at work. She claims he just went ballistic, and I don't believe she's telling me everything. What the hell did she do to my cat? It's gonna be a long lease. FML

I agree, your life sucks 438

You deserved it 126

By crazy cat lady - 03/11/2016 19:31 - Canada - Fredericton

Today, I got a cat so I'd have some company, since my roommate is always with her boyfriend. Too bad the cat likes her more. So now I get to sit and listen to her talk to her boyfriend to get to cuddle with my kitty. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 527

You deserved it 874

Getting no pussy love

By Anonymous - 03/08/2020 05:02

Today, since getting the new kitten that only I wanted, it has scratched me and peed on my socks, my side of the bed and my laptop. It loves my husband though, who was against getting a cat at all. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 301

You deserved it 428

Summer lovin'

By I wish I was making this up - 15/07/2024 09:00 - United States

Today, I found out my cat and my roommate's dog are apparently lesbians who are into what is basically bestiality to us humans. Despite both being female (and fixed), his dog tried to hump my cat, and my cat didn't resist at all. Trying to get his dog off my cat took way more effort than it should have. FML

I agree, your life sucks 347

You deserved it 112

Cats rule, boys drool

By achoooo - 07/11/2009 05:34 - United States

Today, to celebrate moving into a new apartment, my girlfriend decided she would get a kitten. She didn't know I'm allergic to cats. When I told her, she decided that she couldn't date someone who couldn't be around her cat; the one she doesn't have yet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 444

You deserved it 3 015

By Anonymous - 16/12/2009 20:53 - United Kingdom

Today, I was making out with my girlfriend in my room. About two minutes into it, my cat walks in and jumps on the bed with us. Without hesitation, my girlfriend tells me to stop, rolls over, and starts petting my cat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 587

You deserved it 6 496

Say sorry to Mr Whiskers!

By Anonymous - 10/05/2021 14:01

Today, I awoke to my cat sitting on my chest. That wouldn't be so bad if I hadn't tried to get her off. She promptly went crazy and scratched me. My fiancée, who was sleeping next to me, hit me, called me cruel, and told me to apologize to the cat. I did. FML

I agree, your life sucks 932

You deserved it 329

Summer vibes

By milksquad - 17/07/2017 14:11

Today, my roommates adopted two kittens without consulting me. We're not allowed to have pets in our apartment and I'm severely allergic to cats. Oh well, it's not like I needed to be able to breathe this summer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 306

You deserved it 345

By crazy cat lady - 03/12/2014 23:24 - United Kingdom - Coventry

Today, I learned I'm allergic to the 5-month-old kitten we got 3 days ago. It loves me, follows me everywhere and sleeps on my lap in the evenings. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 347

You deserved it 3 676

By Anonymous - 11/06/2011 22:36 - United States

Today, I was lying in bed with my cat. I must have looked at him the wrong way or something, because he hissed and savagely clawed at my face without warning. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 264

You deserved it 7 318

Seddah 3

Thursday 25 February 2010 9:43

You need to grow some balls, mate.

ActionManly 11

Thursday 25 February 2010 9:44

Pussywhipped!

Comments

pogostick_fml 2

Friday 26 February 2010 11:41

lawlren, you completely missed her point. It doesn't matter whether he hates cats or not. It matters that his roommate brought a cat to the apartment without getting his opinion and permission first. So yes, that makes her a selfish bitch. And I love how you rage on snickerdoodles for making the assumption that the roommate didn't ask him about any allergy problems, but you go ahead and make the opposite assumption AND the assumption that the OP's dislike of cats has no reason. And honestly, I don't care for cats. Oh, and I hate caterpillars. So do I have no sensitivity for animals? Here's my own little piece of advice for you, think before you open your mouth.

Sekococo 0

Friday 26 February 2010 14:15

suck it up pussy >:(

indeedlifesocks 0

Friday 26 February 2010 15:26

heres what you do. throw the cat out of the window. it'll live.

Krissy_709 0

Friday 26 February 2010 20:39

haha not kool you only use the dubbel tap if something is trying to kill you

carnagexxx 0

Friday 26 February 2010 21:23

kill the dahm thing i h8 cats man i feel ur pain

tonys_kitten 0

Friday 26 February 2010 22:44

PUSSY!

ashiiya 0

Saturday 27 February 2010 4:36

HAHA you could say that you're not exactly fond of cats. And what's wrong with cats? Yeah yeah, we have animals that we like and dislike, but don't say that it should be killed, they are adorably evil geniuses xP karma can get more painful so be careful xD