Health: Today, my school's 6'2, 270-pound, 375-pound bench-pressing football...

By Shameful - 18/01/2012 19:57 - United States

Today, my school's 6'2, 270-pound, 375-pound bench-pressing football superstar knocked me unconscious in one hit. With a dodgeball. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 853

You deserved it 3 788

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Same thing different taste

By ricksterile - 29/10/2011 00:44 - United States

Today, we were playing dodgeball at school. I tried to duck and jump around so the idiots on the other team couldn't nail me with the ball. Mid-jump, it tore through the air and smashed straight into my ballsack, sending me curling into a fetal position on the floor. I feel like I got sterilized. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 084

You deserved it 10 851

By Anonymous - 21/08/2012 00:46 - United States - Oregon

Today, at football practice, the biggest lineman shouldered me so hard in the groin that my protective cup pushed back with enough force to crack the bone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 806

You deserved it 2 140

Unexpected item

By Highschoolsucks - 18/03/2020 23:00 - Australia - Brisbane

Today, I was hit in the head with a football during class. Spanish class. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 617

You deserved it 137

By ProtoBird - 14/04/2016 04:11 - United States - Grand Rapids

Today, I got hit so hard in the head by a dodgeball that a contact popped right out. To make matters worse, I continued to get hit as a futilely searched for it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 856

You deserved it 1 580

By FirstStringQB - 01/10/2011 22:45 - United States

Today, at football practice, a 200lb lineman ended up landing on my stomach. The weight made me shit myself. My new nickname is "Muddbutt". FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 271

You deserved it 4 743

By haileyjunkin - 22/11/2011 17:53

Today, I got hit in the face at a dodge-ball tournament. My entire mouth was bloody. The sad thing is, I wasn't even playing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 643

You deserved it 3 309

By ouch - 29/01/2010 20:19 - United States

Today, against the will of the kids in my class, we played kick ball. The first time I rolled the ball, the tallest, biggest kid kicked it as hard as he could. I caught it though, with my nuts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 243

You deserved it 5 282

By Noname - 20/02/2009 00:17 - United States

Today, in class my friend played a joke on me by pulling my seat from under me while i was about to sit. I fell and everybody laughed at me. During the next class, I did the same thing to him. He broke his arm. He was the star of the basketball team. Nobody laughed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 186

You deserved it 25 117

By sara - 17/09/2009 21:17 - United States

Today, during gym class, my teacher insisted that everyone should relieve some stress by throwing a basketball at the wall. I wound up and hurled the thing at the wall, it bounced back and hit me in the stomach. I began to vomit uncontrollably. Even my teacher laughed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 262

You deserved it 10 467

By Icci - 12/12/2009 22:54 - United States

Today, at work I was playing football with one of my camp kids in the indoor-pool. I saw a co-worker walking by and I decided to hit him with the football. The football slipped out of my hand and I hit a lady in the face, breaking her nose, and causing her to fall and get a concussion. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 696

You deserved it 37 823

loller27 6

Thursday 19 January 2012 0:28

You have to know the 5 D's of dodgeball. Dodge, duck, dip, dive, and dodge.

JMTS 0

Thursday 19 January 2012 0:28

If you can dodge a wrench, you can dodge a ball...

Comments

MrLoux 6

Friday 20 January 2012 0:05

Dont worry. You probably are better build in the pants region than him. Steroids make some things larger, and others much much smaller.

jacobsmith19 2

Friday 20 January 2012 4:08

Bitch just got knocked the **** out! (;

howie711 0

Friday 20 January 2012 4:33

Dodge, Dip, Duck, Dive and Dodge

Renegade_iR 0

Friday 20 January 2012 5:00

Want free gift cards Download "Juno wallet" app Use the code" JE173520" This will get you extra money

phresh_men17 3

Friday 20 January 2012 6:37

Dodge ball must be his passion lol

jakeacdc 0

Friday 20 January 2012 8:03

That sucks coming from a 260 pound football stat I've learned from others peoples reactions

ukrage 1

Friday 20 January 2012 14:23

Are you sure it was dodgeball and you didn't just walk into shot put practice.

RNS1997 0

Friday 20 January 2012 23:10

Can someone please tell me what OP means? I know it's a name they use for the people who write the fml's but what does it stand for? A reply would be very much appreciated.

ViperFreak 3

Saturday 21 January 2012 7:44

Original Poster. Visit Urbandictionary.

MrC922 0

Saturday 21 January 2012 16:56

#YouGotKnockedThaFuckOut (in my Chris Tucker voice)

vashthestampede 0

Sunday 22 January 2012 0:26

You should have remembered the 5 D's of dodgeball.

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The Top

Today, I deleted all of my dating apps because apparently something is wrong with me. I've been on 20 different dates this year and nothing has come out of it. I feel like I have the plague and no one wants to be near me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 330

You deserved it 149

Today, I was supposed to be working from home. Instead, I ended up taking the kids out to the park for the morning, because my wife “couldn’t even” today. When we got home, she had demolished two bottles of wine, and was masturbating to a home improvement show. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 044

You deserved it 326

The Top

Today, I went in for an audition. Since my wrist had been in a brace all week, I felt I would be fine without it for one day because I didn't want it to be a distraction. I tripped in the middle of the dance routine and crashed on top of my injured wrist. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 519

You deserved it 4 710

Today, my phone alarm went off at 3 AM. I don't remember setting it, but it turns out I'd somehow activated an old "Wake up for a meteor shower" reminder. Despite it being the wrong day by months, I got up, looked outside, and only then did my brain kick into gear and I realized it was set for the wrong date. FML

I agree, your life sucks 325

You deserved it 182

Today, I told a customer at the drive-thru I couldn't hear him as he had his music blaring too loud. The customer then drove to the window and verbally abused me for listening to my iPod at work. My "iPod" is the headset we use to take orders at the drive-thru. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 163

You deserved it 2 507

Today, my 3-year-old said, "Mommy, I can share my teddy grahams with you." I said, "Thanks, honey, you're so sweet." And I ate a few. When I popped the last one in my mouth, I said, "Oh no, all gone!" She said, "That's okay, I have more." Then pulled the next handful out of her underwear. FML

I agree, your life sucks 64 379

You deserved it 7 623

Today, was my high school's senior awards ceremony. Over 400 people were crammed in the hot auditorium. I won five awards and each time I was called up the laughter grew louder. Apparently even the back row could see my pit stains. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 617

You deserved it 5 360

Today, I'm crying in an Uber because my significant other just broke up with me. I'm crying quietly but there's no way the driver hasn't noticed at this point. I'm OK with him not saying anything, but he also hasn't changed the music. All that's playing is Pink, and not the loud, girl-power songs, but the sad, slow ones about love. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 079

You deserved it 217

Same thing different taste

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